The Return of The Physicist
by devilbk
Summary: Sheldon returns to Pasadena after a summer away. He's ready to make some dramatic changes in his life and at least one person won't be happy about those changes. While not a Shenny story per se, this is certainly not a "Happily Shamy After" fantasy.
1. Chapter 1

**1**

On July 20th, after having not heard from him for a few weeks, Leonard Hofstadter received a registered letter from his roommate Sheldon Cooper. Sheldon had suddenly departed their apartment in Pasadena, California two months earlier, ultimately landing in Galveston, Texas after their neighbor, Penny, had finally consented to marry Leonard.

_Dear Leonard,_

_Per our Roommate Agreement I am giving you 30 days notice to vacate Apartment 4A at 2311 North Los Robles Avenue. I will be returning on or about August 25__th__ and by that point will have made arrangements for my new roommate to move in. Should space requirements limit the property you are able to actually move to Apartment 4B I would be happy to recommend a storage facility. I expect to find Apartment 4A clean and habitable upon my return. Thank you._

_Sheldon Lee Cooper_

Leonard showed the letter to his fiancée.

"Well, I was kinda hoping that Sheldon would be willing to let me move in here with you guys or move himself into my place. But, it _is_ his apartment and if he wants to stay and bring in another roommate I guess it is his right."

"Who do you think his new roommate will be?"

"I think we both know someone who wants to be that roommate, Leonard. I was hoping he'd do it eventually but he's moving forward a lot quicker than I thought it ever would."

"I guess being away helped him clear his head. Our Sheldon is growing up."

"Should we say something to Amy?"

"Well, you know Sheldon. He won't say anything to her. She'll have to drag it out of him and by then they'll both be collecting Social Security."

"Amy will be so happy."

"And we still have another month here."

Toward the end of August Leonard and Penny received emails informing them that Sheldon would in fact return to Pasadena on the 25th. That day Sheldon walked into 2311 North Los Robles for the first time in over three months. He slowly walked up the stairs and unlocked the door to Apartment 4A. He was very surprised with what he found awaiting him.

The entire apartment had been rearranged. Excepting the big brown couch, Leonard's furniture and property was gone and in its place, if Sheldon recalled correctly and he always did, was Amy Farrah Fowler's furniture. And standing in the middle of the living room wearing a big smile was Amy Farrah Fowler herself.

"Surprise!"

Amy opened her arms wide expecting that Sheldon would at least hug his new roomie after not having seen her in over three months. Sheldon just stood there.

"Amy, why are your things in my apartment."

"Sheldon, I'm your new roommate. Of course my things would be here."

"Amy, I believe I would be aware if you were my new roommate."

"Sheldon, when Leonard and Penny told me that you'd asked Leonard to move out because you'd be arranging for your new roommate I just knew that you meant me and I moved my things in as soon as he moved his stuff across the hall."

"Amy, if I intended you to be my roommate I would have communicated that to you."

"Perhaps you thought you would live alone for a time and then ask me to move in. To be quite honest, Sheldon, I don't see the point in waiting for something that is inevitable."

"Amy, while I've been away I have been reevaluating many things in my life, my work, my goals, my relationships and, in general, my place in the world. In addition, certain needs have made themselves known."

"I knew it was just a matter of time. Give me some sugar, Sheldon."

"Amy, you misunderstand. I will be returning to the university, having reached a satisfactory agreement which will allow me to expand my areas of study beyond String Theory. I will not only be devoting more time to my work, but certain familial responsibilities have come to the fore."

"He means me. I'm Shelly's sister, Missy."

Standing in the doorway was Sheldon's twin sister and she was holding her 9-month old baby.

"Sheldon, I don't understand."

Missy responded, "My damned hubby walked out on us. Got a job offer to work in Alaska and just split. I'm tired of living in Galveston and decided we need a new start. Sheldon offered me a place for us to live and I'm taking him up on it."

"But, Sheldon…"

"I'm sorry Amy, but my commitment to my sister supersedes any misbegotten ideas you have about us living together. I'd appreciate it if you arranged to have your things removed from my home as soon as possible. Missy's things will be arriving in three days."

"Sheldon, what if I help Missy find her own place and I stay?"

"Amy, Missy has as yet not found employment and will need to balance that employment with child care responsibilities. She will be living here. That's final. Until you remove your things Missy, the baby and I will stay in a hotel. If your things are not gone by the time her things arrive I will be forced to bill you for our hotel stay and any storage costs."

"Sheldon, I don't understand."

"Amy, you jumped to a conclusion without any investigation. You could have simply waited and asked me whether I wished to cohabitate with you but you didn't. You assumed that when I returned from my travels that I would accede to all of the demands you made before I departed. I made other plans."

"What about our relationship agreement?"

"Circumstances will no longer allow me to let you continue entertaining your relationship fantasies. I consider that agreement null and void. If you wish to pursue a friendship and nothing beyond a friendship I would likely be amenable to that."

"But Sheldon…"

"The matter is closed. I suggest that your energy would be better spent removing yourself and your property from the Cooper apartment. Missy, please feel free to rest in my bedroom while I arrange for our temporary lodging and speak with our neighbors."


	2. Chapter 2

**2**

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

Penny opened her door, saw Sheldon and immediately gave him a big hug that he accepted without complaint.

"Welcome home, sweetie!"

"Thank you, Penny, May I come in?"

"Sure."

Penny closed the door behind them.

Sheldon looked around. Between Penny's things and Leonard's things and the general chaos there didn't seem to be any available floor space in Apartment 4B.

"Is Leonard here?"

"He's at work, sweetie."

"How can you tell? There could be a small army hiding in here and you would never find them in this mess."

"Sheldon, I know you're probably upset. I told Amy that she should wait until you got back but she got so excited when she thought that you were going to let her move in…"

"Penny, I never had any intention of allowing Amy Farrah Fowler to move into Apartment 4A and I have demanded that she depart."

"She probably didn't like hearing that."

"I suspect that Amy will be pouting and complaining for some time but the occupancy plans for Apartment 4A do not include her."

"Sheldon, what's going on?"

"My sister Missy's husband left her and their baby to work the oil fields in Alaska. Initially it was to be temporary but last month he sent Missy an email telling her that he had no intention of returning and that he did not wish her to join him. A divorce is in progress. When I received the news I returned to Galveston from my travels and I ultimately invited Missy to return to Pasadena with me and bring my nephew with her."

"Sheldon, I'm a little surprised. I didn't think you were a big fan of children."

"And you would have been correct. However, in the short time that I was home, my nephew and I inexplicably bonded. I quite enjoy his presence and he seems to like me a great deal. I even shared my room with him as we seem to be on the same sleep schedule."

"Wow. That's big. So, you and Amy…"

"Friends perhaps. Nothing more."

"I'm betting she's not happy about that at all."

"I'm sorry for that but my responsibilities to my family and my need to reorganize my research and get back on track to get a Nobel must take precedence over Amy's relationship fantasies. Speaking of which, how are things going with you and Leonard."

"You lived with him for over ten years. What do you think?"

"I think that if you've hidden his body somewhere in here it will begin to smell soon."

"Sheldon."

"Penny, for some reason you believe that your future happiness is connected to a relationship and eventual marriage with Leonard Hofstadter. You know full well that I disagree with that conclusion and always have. However, you have decided to commit to a life with him and I have decided to move on."

"Okay. So what can I do for ya?"

"Since Amy has filled my home with her things making it impossible for Missy, the baby and myself to become settled we will be staying at a hotel until she departs. I would appreciate it if you did not encourage or support any schemes of Amy's that entail her remaining in Apartment 4A."

"But Sheldon, she gave up her apartment. She has nowhere else to go."

"Penny, she did those things of her own volition with no discussion with or encouragement from me. There is no roommate contract in place and I am not responsible for her actions in any way and should not have to adjust my habitation paradigm to deal with them. She is welcome to place her property in storage until she finds a place to live. But she will not be staying with me and Missy. The baby is dealing with enough upheaval and Amy does not do well around children at all. She is always formulating experiments to be performed upon them or observing them like she does her monkeys. I won't permit her to do that with my nephew."

"Additionally, I note that Leonard's couch remains in my apartment. I assume that is for one of two reasons. Either there is just not enough room for it in here and you have decided to gift me with it or you believe that the social intercourse that was taking place in Apartment 4A will continue unabated."

"Well, it's kinda both. We have no more room in here and we were hoping that we would still be able to hang out across the hall with you guys."

"I must remind you how I feel about gifts and in addition I'm very sorry to inform you that Missy's soon-to-be-delivered furniture includes complete living room and dining room sets. There will no space for the couch so you will either need to make room in here or arrange for its immediate removal from the building. Additionally, though there may be occasional situations when the group will be invited to join us across the hall, Apartment 4A can no longer function as the social hub for our group. There is an infant present now and adjustments will need to be made."

"Okay, Sheldon. I get what you're saying. I promise I'll stay out of the Amy situation and we'll make arrangements to move the couch ASAP. Now when do I get to meet the baby? And see Missy of course."

"They are currently napping in my bedroom if they can sleep trough Amy's stomping about while throwing her hissy fit. We will stop over before we go to the hotel."

"Would you like a ride to the hotel?"

"That would be very nice. Thank you. We'll be over shortly."


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

Sheldon went back over to his apartment. A few minutes later there was another knock at Penny's door."

"Hi, Ames. What's up?"

"Sheldon has likely informed you what is up, bestie. I need to enlist your assistance."

"What for?"

"Sheldon, for some reason, listens to you. I will need you to help me convince Sheldon and his sister that Apartment 4A is an inappropriate residence for her and her infant and that they would be happier elsewhere."

"I'm sorry, Amy, but I promised Sheldon that I wouldn't do that. Besides, I think that Sheldon is doing a the right thing."

"The right thing! The right thing would be consummating our relationship not ending it. I've invested years of my time and heart in Sheldon. I have a plan for our happiness."

"Sorry, Amy, but apparently Sheldon made his own plans over the summer."

"Penny, you are my bestie and I demand you choose to support me over Sheldon."

"Nope." Penny replied, making sure to pop the p. "Sheldon has been my friend for a long time, longer than I've known you. I think that what he's doing for his sister and nephew is important and means a lot to him and I'm going to do whatever I can to help him with that. If you prefer to sabotage it then maybe you need to think about your relationship with Sheldon. I've supported you for a long time, Amy, but I think that right now maybe you're just being selfish."

"Of course I'm being selfish. I've put up with Sheldon's silliness for a very long time. I deserve the relationship with Sheldon that I want. I deserve to live with him. I deserve his sweet loving. Not some little, leaky, screaming baby. And that baby will probably not even be close to as brilliant as I am."

"Amy, do what think you need to do but please understand this, while I prefer not to be in the middle of you and Sheldon on something, on this I will come down on Sheldon's side every time."

"Penny, I will require a temporary residence. Sheldon has made it clear that he will not return to the apartment as long as I am there. I am to theoretically make arrangements to have my property temporarily placed in storage."

"Well, I guess you can stay here for a couple of days. We'll need to move the couch over here because ours isn't big enough and you are for damn sure not sharing our bed with us. You bite."

"That will be acceptable."


	4. Chapter 4

**4**

Later that day when Leonard came home from work he opened the door to 4B and saw his old couch in the middle of the living room with Amy Farrah Fowler sitting in Sheldon's spot. Penny did not seem to be around.

"Hello, Amy. Want to catch me up?"

"Sheldon did indeed return from Texas today but with his sister Missy and her baby in tow. Apparently they will be living with him and I have been asked to remove myself from the premises."

"Doesn't entirely answer my question. And where's Penny?"

"Sheldon determined that he, Missy and the baby would stay in a hotel until I remove my property from 4A. Penny drove them over a couple of hours ago."

"And my old couch is in the middle of our living room and our other furniture is in a pile because…"

"Sheldon wanted it removed in favor of Missy's furniture which will soon arrive. And Penny offered to allow me to sleep on it temporarily until matters are resolved."

"I don't understand. What matters?"

"I intend to live with Sheldon in Apartment 4A. I will do whatever is necessary to achieve that goal."

"I guess I understand. And Penny is going to help you with this?"

"Unfortunately no. And I don't really understand why. She has apparently chosen to support your ex-roommate over her bestie."

"I'm sure there's more to it than that. This is probably just a big misunderstanding."

"If only that were the case. Can I at least count on your support in my efforts?"

"Sure, Amy. I've always thought that you and Sheldon were meant to be together like me and Penny."

"Thank you, Leonard."


	5. Chapter 5

**5**

_At the hotel_

It took a while to get them settled, but finally the baby and Sheldon were napping. Missy came out to the suite living room and sat down next to Penny.

"That is one incredibly cute baby, sweetie."

"Which one?"

"The, um, smaller one of course."

"Yeah, that's what I figured. Can I ask you a question, Penny?"

"Sure."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"A buncha things. How about why Leonard?"

"We've been together a long time and I love him."

"Are you in love with him?"

"I said I love him, didn't I?" Penny answered defensively.

"Y'all know there's a difference."

"Yeah, I know. It's just that things have been so awful for me. I failed as an actress. I have no job and no future. Leonard is the only good thing left in my life. I don't want to lose him."

"Yeah, well based on my experience with him, what I know about Leonard and what Sheldon's told me about you two I think that maybe _good_ doesn't mean what you think it means. I think maybe the word you're lookin' for is _safe_."

"Maybe you're not in such a good position to judge, Missy."

"Okay, I guess I deserve that. I obviously made a bad choice in husbands. But I don't regret having my baby. Not at all. Just who I had it with. I think that kinda puts me in a good position to help you."

"But I _want_ to marry Leonard!"

"Do you? Do you really? How's livin' with him workin' out?"

"Not so great. The apartment is wall-to-wall Leonard. The bathroom is filled with all of his allergy crap and other drugs. I need to keep my stuff in the bedroom and carry it in with me in a bucket to the bathroom. He also expects me to do all of the shopping and cleaning and cooking. And he never wants to go anywhere."

"And?"

"I've been doing it. It was easier when most of his stuff was still across the hall. But now his crap is all over the place and I discovered something."

"What's that?"

"That Sheldon was the only one who was cleaning up in 4A. Leonard only made it look like he was cleaning up after himself. He's is an even bigger slob than I am. And that's saying something."

"Penny, I'm gonna say something that I will deny if you repeat it."

"Okay?"

"You're livin' with the wrong rocket scientist."

"They're physicists, Missy, not rocket scientists."

"That's not the point."

"Want to try making it then?"

"Okay. For seven years my brother's been diligently writing to MeeMaw every two weeks and every two weeks those letters have mainly been about you. Even after he started whatever he was doing with that Amy the letters were still about you."

"We do lots of stuff together."

"Penny, me and momma and Meemaw know Sheldon pretty darn well. We can read between the lines. My brother is in love with you."

"Missy, I love Sheldon. I really do. But he's not in love with me. He barely tolerates me."

"You're wrong."

"It's irrelevant. I'm engaged to Leonard. We're going to be married. And Sheldon belongs with Amy."

"Sheldon doesn't belong with Amy. He doesn't believe that and neither do I. He's better off being alone than being with her."

"Missy, you just met her. She's really sweet."

"I'm sorry, Penny, but that ain't my read. Sheldon and I got really close in the past few months. Closer than we've ever been. Even when he wasn't in Texas we talked every single day. We talked about everything that's been going on. He even let me look at his log of daily interactions and stuff. From what I read, Amy's been making Sheldon do lots of things he didn't want to do and y'all have been helping her. You and his other supposed friends."

"Wow. He doesn't let anyone look at his personal stuff ever."

"He had a reason. He was confused. He needed help. And he wasn't getting it here."

"I don't understand."

"Sheldon watched what was goin' on between you 'n' Leonard. He never believed that you two were meant for each other. He was really thrown when you agreed to marry him. He started thinking that maybe that's what he was supposed to do with Amy."

"I think a few of us thought that. Including Amy."

"He doesn't love her, Penny. He doesn't love her and he's not in love with her."

"I'm not sure he really knows that."

"Sheldon may not be as in touch with his feelings as most people, but real true love is kind of hard to miss. He just got accustomed to Amy being in his life. Just like he's accustomed to that awful windbreaker he wears all the time."

"Okay?"

"So anyway, we talked a lot. And over the last few weeks we made some decisions. He decided to end the relationship agreement he had with Amy. If he can he wants to remain friends and only friends with her. Marryin' Amy would be doing what she wants, not what he wants. I think maybe the same kind of thing is going on with you."

"Missy, you've been here for like five minutes. I'm not sure you're in a position to judge."

"Penny, you've met three Coopers. You should know by now that judging is what us Coopers do."

"Fair point."

"I guess I'm throwing a lot of stuff at you. It's only because I'm not sure Sheldon will say anything to you about this."

"I've never known Sheldon to keep his trap shut."

"He kind of decided that his own house is such a wreck at the moment that he really shouldn't say anything until he's in a better position. Me, I'm not so circumspect. I want my brother to be happy. At the very least I know that Amy will never make him happy. I don't believe she's even interested in making anyone other than herself happy. I will not allow him to re-enter a supposedly romantic relationship with her."

"_And_ you're also going to find a job and take care of a baby."

"Sure am."


	6. Chapter 6

**6**

The following morning Sheldon got up early and rode the bus to CalTech. He needed to make some arrangements for his formal return to work. He was in his office making notes on his whiteboard he heard a knock at his door. When he opened it he found his boss, Dr. Gabelhauser. He invited him in.

"Good morning, Dr. Gabelhauser."

"Good morning, Dr. Cooper. I heard you were in the building and I wanted to welcome you back."

"Thank you. I am satisfied to return to work. In fact, I intended to come by your office later to go over a few things."

"I have some questions for you too. Would now be a good time for us to speak?"

"Certainly. May I begin?"

"Fine."

"I realize that there has been some concern about my disappointing progress on String Theory."

"Dr. Cooper, I believe the disappointment is primarily yours. The university is quite satisfied with you progress. Honestly, we only expect progress towards a proof from you. It may be many years before an absolute proof is found."

"Dr. Gabelhauser, I've always considered finding that proof to be my mission. To realize that I may never see it is profoundly disappointing."

"Be that as it may, we would be more than happy to see you continue your work with us."

"And I intend to do so with the same diligence as I always have. However, continuing to work towards an answer I may never know puts me in a difficult position. I believe that I am capable of great discoveries and do not wish to only devote myself to something wherein the most I can hope for is the discovery of minor clues."

"What do you propose?"

"I wish to expand my areas of study until I can find an additional area of concentration that will enable me to make the kind of progress in the field that I think we both believe I am capable."

"I'm not certain that there are enough hours in the day for even you to do that much work, Dr. Cooper."

"That is why I propose to hire my current assistant and soon-to-be-Dr. Alex Jensen to work with me on this."

"I must admit we were having some trouble finding a place for Ms. Jensen. We do very much want her to remain with us. We just currently have no position available."

"You may be aware that I I am the recipient of some additional funding which would allow me to hire Dr. Jensen and replace her as my assistant with someone else to work for us both."

"To be honest, I was wondering what you might do with Mrs. Latham's latest donation. Do you know why she switched her funding to you and away from Dr. Hofstadter?"

"I can't say but I would posit that it may have something to do with Hofstadter's recent betrothal."

"I suspected that could be it. It's one of the problems that can come up when our faculty members satisfy the personal requests of donors. I can't imagine what Mrs. Latham might ask of you."

"Oh she was quite clear. Mrs. Latham requested that I make my funding requests in writing and never speak with her or see her again. I am quite happy to abide by those conditions."

"Well, then I suggest you speak with Ms. Jensen and get her to finish her dissertation as quickly as she can."

"I expect to discuss the matter with her shortly. I believe there are some other matters that need to be discussed, tenure among them."

"Ah, yes. Dr. Cooper, you must be aware that you were the leading candidate to receive tenure before your departure."

"I would concur. However, I would like to temporarily withdraw my candidacy until my work paradigm is more settled."

"Well, thank you for considering that action. I wish it didn't raise more problems than it solves, though."

"How so?"

"Well, Dr. Koothrapali has spent more time recently working for you than doing his own work so he really is not ready. Kripke, well, the prospect of dealing with Dr. Kripke in perpetuity is disturbing on a number of levels. And Dr. Hofstadter…"

"What about Dr. Hofstadter?"

"There has been some scuttlebutt about his having something to do with why your monopole expedition failed. Additionally, Joyce Kim, our former grad student who turned out to be a North Korean spy, began blogging about her exploits on the Internet recently. She said some very disturbing things about Dr. Hofstadter. The government has threatened to revoke his security clearance and conduct a formal investigation. I've had to spend a great deal of time recently with them discussing this. Even the prospect of an investigation is quite worrisome. The board thinks it would be quite inappropriate to reward him with tenure at this time."

"I cannot speak to the veracity of Joyce Kim's blog. However I can understand how the university might have a problem at this point."

"Can I convince you to reconsider your decision? Even with your recent confusion, you are one of the best people in your field. The university would be very happy to grant you tenure, even now."

"I must say I'm surprised."

"Please give it some serious thought. The position would enable you to move into the vacant office suite which would support your staffing expansion."

"That's quite true. It could also help with another matter."

"What would that be?"

"My sister has come to live with me and she has an infant son. I have committed to assist her with her child care which would entail bringing the child to work with me a couple of days a week. I was worried that the daily traffic in my office might make that difficult. Having the suite would ease matters."

"Dr. Cooper, I must say that I never would have considered you as a caregiver. The thought that you voluntarily took on such a responsibility raises your profile in my estimation. It makes me think that I was initially even more correct in offering you tenure."

"Dr. Gabelhauser, one cannot be more correct. You can either be correct or incorrect. But I take your meaning in the spirit it was given. I will render you my decision by the time I leave today. Will that be acceptable?"

"That will be fine. Is there anything else we need to discuss?"

"I don't believe so. I expect to be back full-time on Monday morning."

"Good. Despite our differences we've missed having you around, Dr. Cooper."

"Thank you, Dr. Gabelhauser. Good day."


	7. Chapter 7

**7**

_Later that morning in Sheldon's office _

Alex Jensen knocked on Dr. Sheldon Cooper's open office door.

"Hello, Alex. I'm happy you are able to meet with me on such short notice. Please come in and have a seat."

"Hello, Dr. Cooper. It's very nice to see you back."

"Thank you."

"I was sorry to hear that you are having some trouble with your work. To be honest, I may be having similar issues."

"If you mean finally realizing that it is unlikely that you can achieve your life's goal within the space of your lifetime, then yes, we share a problem. That is one of the reasons I asked you to meet with me."

"Okay?"

"The university requires I continue my present course of work with String Theory even though it would likely never reach the fruition I desire. As I have accepted funding to support that work I am committed to continuing. However…"

"However?"

"That does not mean I am required to limit myself to that area of endeavor. I am a genius and quite capable of multitasking. I was hoping that with your help the two of us would be able find an area that would satisfy us intellectually and also allow us both to move forward in our field."

"You want me to come back and work for you?"

"Work _with_ me. We would share in this enterprise. And you could also be able to help me deal with my String Theory commitments. I have arranged for adequate funding to support a full-time position for you."

"And my studies?"

"Alex, I am one of your academic advisors. You satisfied most of the requirements for your doctorate long ago. Your dissertation is all that remains and I have perused your online notes. Take a week. Finish it. Come back and work with me."

"I need to think about it."

"I understand. There are some new wrinkles that you should be aware of."

"If one of those wrinkles is that Dr. Fowler then no deal."

"I do not intend Dr. Fowler to be involved in my professional pursuits in any way. No, there is something else. My sister, Melissa, and her infant son are now living with me. As an enticement for Melissa to move to Pasadena and share my apartment I committed to assisting her with child care. This is not a hollow promise as I very much enjoy the child's presence in my life. I suspect that his care will entail him accompanying me to work a couple of days a week. I will need to arrange space in my office for a crib and changing station. And also a mini-fridge and microwave for his food. Do you have any objection to dealing with my nephew on occasion? I will not expect you to participate in his care except for minor or occasional assistance."

"Dr. Cooper, I've changed my mind."

"You'd prefer not working with me?"

"No. I no longer need to think it over. I'd be happy to work with you."

"Very good. Now go finish that dissertation so that we may begin our work in earnest after next week."

"Would you like me to make arrangements for the additional items to be brought to your office?"

"Actually, Alex, those tasks… answering the phone, making appointments, doing my errands, etc.… will no longer be part of your portfolio. You will be my associate and your responsibilities will be academic and intellectual. We will be hiring an assistant to take care of those other things. I have someone in mind. Additionally it is likely that we will be moving to other quarters. I will see you in a week's time. I expect that most of this will be settled by then."

"Thank you, Dr. Cooper. See you soon."

"And when you return please address me as Sheldon."


	8. Chapter 8

**8**

_Meanwhile at the hotel, soon after Sheldon took the bus to CalTech_

There's a knock at the door. Missy opens it to find Amy Farrah Fowler, her right hand outstretched in greeting. Missy ignores the gesture.

"Hi. Um, we didn't actually officially meet yesterday. I'm Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. I'm Sheldon's girlfriend. He's probably told you a great deal about me."

"Not at first. But when I asked him about some of the stuff in his Daily Interraction Log he filled in some of the blanks."

"I refuse to believe Sheldon permitted you to read his Daily Interaction Log. He never let me read it and he respects my opinion much more than he respects yours."

"Yeah, that sounds about right. Or at least it used to."

"I don't understand."

"I know that all of you folks have weird family situations and y'all don't act normal when a family crisis comes up. Us Coopers aren't like that. When one of us is in trouble we circle the wagons. We don't throw the one in trouble to the wolves like y'all did. Yeah, I was going through crap in my marriage and had a brand new baby, but I could still see my little brother was in world of trouble. All the Coopers zoomed in right away to help Shelly. I mean, we couldn't fix his troubles with the science-y stuff. He'll have to figure that out on his own eventually. But we could make sure he felt safe and loved. So we did that for him until he could stand on his own two feet again."

"I could have done that for him."

"Sorry to be the one to tell you, but you're one of the big reasons he ran away in the first place. I would think that someone with as big a brain as you have would have figured that out by now."

"You are quite wrong, Sheldon left because he was having an academic difficulty exacerbated by changes in Leonard and Penny's evolving relationship and habitation paradigm."

"Yeah. And you were pressurin' him to do a whole bunch of stuff he didn't want to do. My brother can be very stubborn. I know that. Again, if you know him at all, you know that he likes to come around to an idea on his own. If you pressure him he just shuts down."

"He was gradually adjusting to the progress our relationship required."

"Why?"

"Because I requested it of him."

"When."

"When we signed our relationship agreement."

"So you've been pressurin' him to be more physical almost from the moment it began?"

"You're making me sound like something I am not."

"Am I?"

"I love Sheldon and I'm the best girlfriend he will ever have."

"Yeah, well so far you're the only one he's ever had."

"My point."

"It's not a good thing."

"Are you implying that Sheldon should have additional girlfriends?"

"What I'm out and out sayin' is that Sheldon should have _other_ girlfriends. Girlfriends that are not you."

"I fail to understand how you could possibly have formed a negative opinion of me since we have only just met."

"I formed a negative opinion of you and everyone else who were supposedly Shelly's friends when I found my brother sittin' outside my front door cryin' three months ago. It was two days before he'd say anything. After a week we could get him to hold together long enough for a phone call to let you people think he was okay but that was about it."

"I had no idea. Why didn't you tell us any of this? We could have helped."

"I can't believe you still don't get it. You're the reason he was like that. All of you. You broke him. You were his friends and you didn't just let this happen to him. You actively did it to him. You and Leonard. And Penny but Penny's in almost as bad a shape as Sheldon and she's trying to cover it with her drinking."

"Wait! You are completely wrong on that account. Penny is deeply and hopelessly in love with Leonard. She is happier than I've ever seen her. I fully expect to be the Maid of Honor at my bestie's wedding."

"Yup. You are hopelessly deluded. I can see there's no point in talkin' to you at all. So I'm just gonna lay it all out there. You are not good for my brother. You are not his girlfriend and I will die before I let you be. I can take care of and protect two babies just as easy as one so don't try me."

"Sheldon loves me."

"I'd be happy to put that on your tombstone. By the way, how the hell did you know where we were? Sheldon said he wasn't tellin' anyone but Penny where we were stayin'."

"I, um, have an app on my phone."

"That does what?"

"It keeps track of where my friends are through their cell phones."

"And exactly how many friends are you currently keeping track of?"

"T-t-t-t-two."

"I wonder if I can guess which two people you fuckin' lojacked."

"I just like to know where they are in case they need me."

"Give me your phone."

"What?"

"Give me your phone. I won't say it again."

Amy handed Missy her phone. Missy put it on the floor and, appreciating that she was wearing her boots, stomped the phone into pieces."

"Missy, why did you do that?"

"Stop stalkin' Sheldon. And for that matter stop stalkin' Penny too. It's creepy. Now get the hell out."

"I would appreciate it if you did not share this conversation with Sheldon or Penny."

"We're not friends, sugar. I will share it with whomever I damn well please."


	9. Chapter 9

**9**

_Three days later_

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Leonard and Penny._

"Hi, sweetie. What's up?"

"Penny, do you know where Amy Farrah Fowler might be?"

"Well, at the moment she's in my bathroom where she's been for the last hour. What's up?"

"I asked her to remove her property from Apartment 4A by this point in time. Not only has she not done that but there is now a monkey gamboling about in there."

"Sheldon, I'm trying to stay out of this. You need to speak to Amy. I'll get her."

"Thank you, Penny. Once I've finished with Amy I need to speak with you about an important matter."

"Sure, sweetie."

At that moment Amy Farrah Fowler came out to the living room.

"Hello, Sheldon."

"Amy, I made a request of you that you have not satisfied."

"I do not believe it was a reasonable request. I do not believe that it makes any sense for me to move my property from Apartment 4A when I know that it will eventually return there when we decide to cohabitate and marry. I believe that it makes more sense for you to make other arrangements for Missy and her child. In that way all of our lives can return to a semblance of normalcy, the homeostasis that you adore so."

"Amy, there was a time when I believed your obliviousness to the desires and needs of others to be quite charming. I no longer believe that. You are an incredibly selfish woman who demands that she get her own way and be the center of attention at all times. I will no longer permit you to do that in regard to me. I informed you that our relationship has been terminated. You apparently have concluded otherwise. Here is what will now happen. I have engaged a storage company that will shortly arrive and remove your property from my apartment. You have one hour to remove your monkey before I call the appropriate authorities and have him removed and potentially euthanized. I will then have the apartment fumigated while Missy's furniture remains in the moving truck downstairs. As I can recall your credit card number the costs for all of these tasks has been charged to you."

"But Sheldon, this makes no sense. I'm your perfect match. We belong together."

"Amy Farrah Fowler, though I am grateful that through our relationship agreement my mind has been opened to the possibility that I may someday pair bond with someone, I can assure you that person will not be you."

From her bedroom Penny called out "The monkey can't stay here. Leonard is probably allergic."

"I suggest you remove the monkey before the storage company arrives. I plan to open all of the apartment windows at that point and if he were to escape…"

At that Sheldon turned and went downstairs to await the movers.

Amy turned to Penny.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"I'd start by dealing with the monkey. After that I suggest you start looking for a place to live."

"Leonard said I could stay with you as long as I need to."

"Yeah, that's not going to work, Amy. There's barely enough room here for me and Leonard. You have until tomorrow. If you're not gone by then I'll find a new place to live and _you_ can marry Leonard."

"That's a hollow threat, Penny. You have no job, no money and nowhere else to go."

"Actually, Amy, I have two friends across the hall and I love children. I'm going downstairs to speak with Sheldon. I suggest you make some arrangements for your damn monkey."

"His name is Ricky."

"I don't care."

At that Penny headed downstairs. She found Sheldon sitting on the stairs near the front door.

"Hello again, Penny."

"Hi sweetie. I thought you might like some company."

"That's very nice of you. I missed you very much while I was away."

"I missed you too, sweetie."

"Have you found a new source of employment yet?"

"Not really. Leonard keeps saying I don't need to work anymore."

"How do you feel about that?"

"Kind of useless."

"I may have an answer to that."

"Really?"

"I need a new assistant."

"What happened to Alex? She was doing a pretty good job, wasn't she?"

"Alex did an excellent job. That is why she and I will be doing some work together and that will hopefully expand into a new theoretical enterprise for the two of us. We will both need an assistant to help us out with a number of more mundane tasks."

"So?"

"I'd like you to be that assistant."

"You're kidding. You realize that I know almost nothing about what you do?"

"I do."

"So why me?"

"Can you answer phones and take messages?"

"Yes."

"Can you make photocopies?"

"Sure."

"Can you organize materials according to instructions?"

"Of course I can."

"Can you keep people from bothering us?"

"Probably."

"You are capable of doing the job. Add to that your awareness of my various _idiosyncrasies_ and how to respond to them and you will be the perfect assistant."

"I'll ask again. Why me?"

"Because I think you need a challenge. Because I believe you need to rebuild your confidence. The Penny I know would not be sitting in her apartment waiting for her fiancée to tell her what he thinks she should do. The Penny I know would be grabbing the world by its horns, wrestling it to the ground and showing it who is in charge."

"I'm not so sure that Penny exists any more Sheldon."

"I disagree and I'm going to give her every opportunity to return."

"So what are the specifics on this job?"

"To start it will be halftime, mornings from 8:30 till 12:30. I suspect it will become full-time very quickly once Alex joins us. I will pay you $18 per hour. I assume that by now Leonard has added you to his health insurance policy. If not I will make arrangements to insure you. I will warn you in advance that there may be some limited child care involved as my nephew will accompany me to work one or two days a week."

"Okay. I guess we have a deal."

"Do you need to discuss this with Leonard?"

"The last time Leonard got involved I lost the job. Remember?"

"Indeed. And you rewarded him for that by agreeing to marry him. Not the first time that you rewarded his bad behavior, as I recall."

"Can we not go into that now?"

"As you wish. One additional request. Are you willing to drive me to the university on the days that you work?"

"Sure. And if this goes full-time I'll drive you home too."

"Thank you. We will commence Monday. I suspect that Leonard will not take kindly to my offer to hire you."

"I think I can handle Leonard. All I have to do is ask him the right way."

"You mean dangle the prospect of coitus in front of him."

"Well. Yeah."

"Penny, you really need to think more deeply about what it is you're doing regarding Leonard."

"Yeah. I know. But every time I bring something like that up he just pours me a big glass of wine and we end up…"

"I'm well aware of where you end up."

"God, Sheldon."

"Yes, the deity is often invoked."

"Yeah, anyway I'm heading back upstairs to make sure that Amy hasn't convinced Leonard to let a monkey live with us."

Ten minutes later a sulking Amy Farrah Fowler came downstairs carrying a cage holding her monkey, Ricky.

"I still fail to understand why you are doing this to me Sheldon. I'm the best girlfriend you will ever have."

"Be that as it may, Amy, you overstepped and made unwarranted assumptions about me and a life that I have no desire to be part of. Here is the address and phone number for the storage facility where your property may be found. As I do not know when or if we will meet again I bid you farewell."

"Sheldon, you said you wanted to be friends."

"I have been informed that friends make an effort to at least listen to their friend's desires. You have made no such effort. In fact, you have often attempted to thwart my desires. Perhaps you need to spend some time learning about what friendship is."

"Sheldon, I believe that you are the one who is misguided here."

"You are free to believe whatever you wish to believe. You are just not free to impose those beliefs and wishes upon others as you have with myself. Goodbye, Amy Farrah Fowler."


	10. Chapter 10

**10**

That night, following the removal of Amy Farrah Fowler's property, the fumigation of the apartment, and the moving in and arrangement of Missy's things, there was a knock on the door.

"Hello, Leonard."

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Sheldon?"

"Currently I am organizing Missy's furnishings so that this apartment is habitable in thirty minutes time when she and the baby arrive."

"You know what I mean, Sheldon."

"Leonard, I have done a number of things since my return to Pasadena. You will need to be more specific."

"Why did you offer my fiancée a job?"

"I offered Penny a position because I had one available and I was aware she had none."

"Penny doesn't need to work. She's going to be my wife."

"Is that a paid position?"

"Of course not."

"Then what is Penny to do for money?"

"If Penny needs anything she can ask me for money."

"And you will give it to her?"

"If I think it's an appropriate request, yes."

"And you understand what kind of a position this puts Penny in?"

"Penny and I are in love and are going to be married. That is how things like that work."

"I think you are mistaken, Leonard. However the point is moot. The position has been offered and accepted. Penny begins work Monday. And I would thank you for not getting involved in her work like you did last time."

"If I deem it necessary I will get involved, Sheldon."

"Leonard, please listen to what I say to you and attempt to understand. If you interfere with my work, my office or my employees I will go to Gabelhauser and Seibert and tell them some stories about you and your work."

"Yeah, and what if I ask Penny to work with me instead?"

"Leonard, I am well aware of the limitations of your funding. You are barely keeping your lab running. You cannot afford new equipment. You have been forced to increase your course load and you can't find any grad students willing to assist you because they are concerned that even though you advertise your engagement to Penny you have previously advertised your eagerness for expanding your sexual horizons. The female grad students see you as a _lech_ and the male grad students see you as a _dweeb_. And the elderly female donors you previously flirted with to secure funding are well aware of your pending nuptials. In fact, by now you have likely been informed that Mrs. Latham has decided to fund my work instead of yours. I cannot imagine why. Oddly, it is her funding that allows me to hire both Alex and Penny full-time. To sum up, you cannot afford to hire Penny or anyone. I can."

"Things will change for me when I'm given tenure, Sheldon. I'm certain that I'm the leading candidate. That comes with a big raise that will allow me and Penny to get a house with a picket fence and get started on our family."

"Leonard, your imagination is quite fertile."

"You've changed since you went away, Sheldon. And not for the better."

"Well, Leonard, I believe you once said that I was one lab accident away from becoming a super-villain. Yes, I was aware of you saying that. In response I can only say _Mwah-ha-ha_."

"This isn't over, Sheldon."

"I'm well aware of that, Leonard. But I know the endgame. You don't."


	11. Chapter 11

**11**

Penny did not enjoy her weekend. Though she had hoped to spend it getting ready for her return to the working world and reviewing her work wardrobe, she instead had to spend much of it mollifying a sullen Leonard.

"I don't want you working for Sheldon. I prefer that you not work at all."

"Leonard, I am bored out of my mind sitting at home all the time."

"You have yet to read any of the science books I set aside for you. Once I have tenure you'll need to be able to entertain and converse appropriately with my colleagues. And you should also be checking the course catalogs I brought home for classes to take. If you start now you could have your degree in two or three years. Sooner if you also go to summer school."

"Because I'm stupid, right? Because you don't want people to know that your fiancée is a dumb hick from Nebraska."

"That's not it."

"Sheldon doesn't seem to think I'm stupid. And I figure I'll pick up all sorts of science-y stuff working for him. Is that the problem?"

"No. I just don't want you working. I want you to take care of our home and our kids."

"Well right now we don't have any kids and we haven't even talked about when we will. By the way, in case you're at all interested my answer would be not yet."

"We'll need to get started soon because I want a big family."

"Yeah, that's not gonna happen, Leonard. There's no way I'm spending the next ten years pregnant."

"You'll see. Once we get started you won't want to stop."

"And you know this how?"

"I know you."

"And you think I want a big family?"

"Of course."

"Well, that discussion is going to be tabled for a while. A long while. I'll be staying on the pill and you will continue using condoms. There is no negotiating the matter."

"Penny, I don't get it. You have no acting career any more. There is absolutely no reason for us to not start working on our family right away."

"There's a big reason, Leonard. I. Don't. Want. To. Period."

"I guess I'll just have to be a little more patient. But once we have the wedding out of the way… And by the way, how do you expect to put your dream wedding together and work full time?"

"What dream wedding would that be, Leonard?"

"Haven't you been planning a big dream wedding since you were a little girl?"

"Um, no."

"I thought all little girls did that?"

"Yeah, some of my friends did that. I thought it was silly. They all saw getting married as their goal in life. I had other things in mind. I don't want a big to-do Leonard. We can't afford it and my family can't afford it. You are barely paying the rent and our other bills. We haven't had a night out since forever. Part of the reason that I accepted the job with Sheldon was so we'd have some money for stuff we've been doing without."

"If we really need something we can ask my mother."

"No to that. I can work and I will work. Sheldon is going to pay me a good salary and also offered to provide health insurance, something you haven't bothered to follow up on."

"There's a bunch of paperwork involved, Penny. I'll get around to it."

"Don't bother. I bet Sheldon has me set up by the end of my first day."

"I still object to you working for him. He's changed. Since he came back he's been different. Look at what he did to poor Amy."

"Leonard, Amy did that to herself. Sheldon went and manned up and put his family first. Maybe you could learn a lesson from him about what family really means."

"I know what family means. I watched _That '70's Show_ and _Happy Days_."

"Well, I know you sure as hell didn't learn it from _your _family."

"One good thing about you working with Sheldon is that we'll be able to have lunch together every day."

"Maybe."

"What do you mean maybe? Sheldon always eats lunch with me and Howard and Raj. We'll just get a bigger table."

"Don't start planning out my workday for me, Leonard. I'll see what's going on when I get there. And I wouldn't be expecting Sheldon to go back to the Sheldonian schedule either. He has additional responsibilities now."

"Like what."

"He's helping Missy with the baby."

"Yeah. I'll believe that when I see it. I predict that Missy will run back to Texas within a month."

"I wouldn't bet on that."

"Sheldon will drive her crazy just like he drove me crazy and just like he drove Amy crazy."

"Y'know Leonard, sometimes you can be a real asshole. I'm going across the hall. Why don't you, hmmm, I don't know, try cleaning up some of your shit."


	12. Chapter 12

**12**

Penny slammed the door to 4B behind her and then knocked on Sheldon and Missy's door. Missy opened it.

"Hi sweetie. Seekin' a little shelter from the hobbit?"

"You heard that, huh."

"Couldn't help it. And the slammin' door kinda made the point."

"I'm sorry. I hope I didn't wake the baby."

"Nah. He's a pretty sound sleeper. See?"

Penny looked over to see Sheldon in his spot on Missy's couch, rocking the sleeping baby in his arms.

"Oh my God. Those two look so sweet together."

"I know, right. Would you like a cup of tea, Penny?"

"Well, since I know that it's non-optional, sure."

"Hello, Sheldon."

"Hello Penny. I'm sorry if my offer of employment has caused any discord between you and Leonard."

"Um, no you're not."

"You're correct. I suspected that Leonard would take issue with any situation you became involved in that he couldn't control."

"I think you might be exaggerating a bit, Sheldon."

"I don't believe that I am. Don't you recall how he behaved while the two of you weren't even dating? Even though he involved himself in a succession of relationships with other women he always took the time and effort to undermine any that you became involved in."

"Yeah, he did kinda do that, didn't he?"

"And when you finally got a leading role in that silly movie, did he not help get you fired?"

"Yeah, he did that too."

"Why do you think he did those things, Penny? And please don't say he did them out of love for you."

"Sheldon, why are you so interested in what's going on between me and Leonard. I'd think with all the stuff going on with you that your big brain would be pretty busy."

"You have been my friend for a long time, Penny. I care very deeply for you. I do not wish you to be unhappy."

"I'm not unhappy, Sheldon."

"Penny, I have a dictionary over here," Missy called over from the kitchen. "I'm pretty sure that happy is another one of those words that you might be confused about."

"C'mon, Missy. You have other things you should be thinking about too. Like what are you going to do for a job?"

"Funny you should ask. I happen to have an interview scheduled for Monday morning. Shelly, I know it's your first day back and all, but would you mind takin' the baby for the morning? My interview is at the university so I can ride over with you and pick up the baby after."

"I don't anticipate that will be a problem. You can theoretically ride back here with Penny after lunch, if that's alright with her."

"I don't have a problem. I assume you have a car seat."

"We do. I apologize for imposing on you for the ride. Junior is driving Missy's car here from Galveston and he was apparently waylaid in Reno. We expect him sometime next week."

"So I get to meet yet another Cooper, huh?"

"Yes. But you should be wary. Junior fancies himself as a bit of a ladies man. He will likely attempt to woo you away from Leonard."

"He likely won't be successful."

"You might be surprised. Junior has a particular way of accomplishing the task. It tends to involve beating the competition to a pulp. In Leonard's case that will not be difficult. I suspect Leonard would do most of the work himself."

"I would appreciate it if you two made sure that Junior knows I am not available."

"I will inform him thusly. However, Junior has other issues with Leonard that have little to do with you and have had years to percolate."

"I don't understand."

"Junior does not understand what happened to me in the Arctic all those years ago, but he does know that Leonard was responsible. He also believes that Leonard is at least partly responsible for my recent troubles."

"And you haven't done anything to convince him otherwise?"

"Shelly asked him to forget about it. He may not have a memory like Shelly's, but Junior doesn't forget stuff like this. He may forget to go to work or where he parked his truck but he won't forget when someone has done something' to hurt his little brother."

"Junior considers harming me to be his personal province."

"Shelly, Junior hasn't done a thing to you in years and years."

"You are forgetting the noogie episode of 2012, Missy."

"Fine. But Penny, I suggest you tell Leonard to make himself scarce while Junior's here."

"I'm sure that Leonard can handle Junior."

"Ooh this will be fun."

"So you have an interview at the university?"

"Way to change the subject, Penny. But yeah, I'm interviewin' for a manager position at one of the campus cafeterias on Monday. Not the one in the Physics Department."

"I guess I should have assumed there were other places to eat on campus besides where you guys eat."

"Oh there are quite a number of alternate eating places."

"That you have never sampled. Have you, Sheldon?"

"I've been meaning to inspect the various facilities but who has the time?"

"Well, if _I'm_ gonna be runnin' one of 'em I expect you will make the time."

"As long as it passes inspection…"

"Sheldon Lee Cooper, did I not make sure that _Fuddruckers_ passed your inspection and served you your food according to your specifications?"

"You did."

"So you can expect the same at any establishment that I am in charge of."

"Alright."

"Good."

"I assume that you'll be dining with Leonard, Penny."

"I have breakfast with Leonard and I have dinner with Leonard. I think I'll have lunch with whomever I damn well please."

"Good for you, Penny."

"I guess I should head back home. Hopefully he's calmed back down by now. Thanks for the tea."

"Penny, you know that you are always welcome here."

"I know that, Sheldon."

"I'm not sure that you do. Never consider it an imposition to come over. Never. Am I correct, Missy?"

"My brother speaks for me, Penny. You are always welcome here. You are the only one of Shelly's friends that will always be welcome here. The _only_ one."

"Well, thank you, I guess," Penny responded confusedly. "Good night."

Penny closed the door quietly behind her. "That baby sure is a sound sleeper," she said out loud as she crossed the hall back to 4B. "I sure hope Leonard is asleep. I'm really not looking forward to what I'll have to do if he's not."

_Back in 4A._

"Shelly, this is gonna take some time."

"I'm not so certain it will, Missy."

"I really think Penny needs some professional help. The poor thing is depressed as hell and doesn't even realize what's really going on."

"Penny seems as she always has. Perhaps a bit more tired."

"Sheldon, I haven't seen that girl in over five years. Are you sure Leonard isn't a vampire because something has sucked all the life out of her."

"I will stipulate that you may have a better perspective on any change that has befallen Penny. I still believe we can bring her back from the abyss. I believe that things will escalate rather quickly once Penny begins working again. Leonard is fairly predictable."

"I don't know. If he's around when Junior shows up…"

"Penny will want to protect Leonard. I know."

"It's going to get messy. And I suspect we aren't done with your girlfriend."

"She is no longer my girlfriend, Missy."

"I know that and you know that. I'm pretty sure Dr. Fowler doesn't know that."

"I have plans for Dr. Fowler. In any case, it is now time for bed. Can you take the baby? I believe my arm has fallen asleep."

"Sure, Shelly. And thank you again for everything you are doing."

"Missy, you are my sister. I am doing what a brother should do."

"Shelly, you know damned well that just a few months ago you wouldn't be doing any of this."

"You are quite likely correct. I have evolved in the past few months. And I wish to help Penny to do the same. She has been a good friend to me over the years and she is in need, even if she doesn't recognize it."

"We're going to come out on top, Sheldon. And Penny will be there with us. I'm sure of it."

"I hope you're right, Missy. And I'm certain that you are correct that it will get messy."


	13. Chapter 13

**13**

_Monday morning_

Penny got up early to get ready for her first day of work. Since it had been a long time since she'd really been a morning person, she got up extra early, started her coffee, went out for a quick jog around the block, picked up a bear claw and returned to the apartment. The coffee she'd started before she left was ready. She opened the refrigerator to get the milk for her coffee and couldn't find it.

"Leonard, where's my milk?"

"I threw it out."

"Leonard, I know it wasn't spoiled. I just bought it Saturday."

"I decided that it made more sense if our apartment didn't have anything in it that disagreed with me."

"You're kidding, right?"

"No. I concluded that there is a pretty good likelihood that our children could be lactose intolerant so I thought it made more sense if we got used to not having any dairy around at all."

"First of all, we've had the discussion about children. And besides, there's just as good a chance that any kids we might have would be like me, able to eat and drink pretty much anything."

"Well, it would be unfair to any of them that are intolerant and to me if stuff we couldn't have was waved in our faces all the time."

"Yeah, I think I see what you're doing, Leonard. I'm going over to Missy and Sheldon's for some milk. Have a nice day at work."

"I'll see you for lunch, right?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. Don't count on it."

Penny left her apartment carrying her bag and coffee and knocked on the door to 4A.

Missy opened the door, holding the baby. Penny could see Sheldon running around the apartment gathering items in preparation for the trip to CalTech. "Mornin' sweetie."

"Good morning, Missy. I sure hope you guys have milk."

"Of course we have milk, Penny. I see you've decided to resume your career of crime."

"Sheldon, I'll have you know I bought milk on Saturday. Leonard threw it out. It seems he's just decided that our whole apartment and maybe life is going to be lactose intolerant. And our future kids too, whether they are or not."

"Missy, it's begun."

"Sure has."

"What are you two talking about?"

"Leonard is marking his territory, like a cat. He wants to make sure you know that you are his. That his needs are primary."

"Gee, I thought he was just being a jerk."

"Penny, you are welcome to our milk. In fact, if you like you are welcome to join us for breakfast each workday morning. You are aware of the meal schedule. Please feel free to join us."

"That's really nice of you, Sheldon, but I wouldn't want to impose."

"Sweetie, it's not an imposition. Havin' an extra pair of hands here in the a.m. will help us get ourselves and the baby ready for work. Look at it as a perk of workin' for my brother."

"Okay. But at least let me do the cooking sometimes."

"Penny does make very good French Toast. At least it smelled good."

"Okay. So you're on for Wednesday, Penny."

"Okay."

"It will also spare you from Leonard's morning sputem expulsion."

"Don't remind me. For someone who's so damn careful about what goes into his body he still has a lot of really disgusting stuff coming out of it."

"Penny, not in front of the baby."

"That's not what I meant. Hmmm, maybe it was…"

"Anyway, are we almost ready to go?" asked Missy.

"All set."

Penny looked over to see Sheldon wearing a Babybjorn with the baby tucked in and both of them smiling. "Oh my God," she thought, "that has got to be the cutest thing I've ever seen." Thinking quickly she pulled out her phone and took a picture. All three took a moment to look at it.

"Please forward that to my phone, Penny?"

"Me too, Sweetie."

As they all began to head out the door Penny realized what adding a child to the process meant. Sheldon had the baby and one bag with food and cleaning supplies. Missy had her own bag filled with diapers and clothing plus the car seat. Penny had her stuff plus Sheldon's messenger bag and yet another bag of assorted baby stuff. She could only imagine what might happen if the baby wasn't being cooperative. Then she thought "Have I even heard this baby cry yet?" She quickly banished the thought from her head. "Don't wanna jinx it."

As they were heading down the stairs Leonard sped by without saying a word or offering any assistance. Penny momentarily thought of tripping him.

Sheldon stopped for a moment.

"Penny, I know what you're thinking. Put all the negativity out of your mind. You are embarking upon a new venture and I'm certain that the prospect of you being successful at it terrifies Leonard."

"Sheldon I'm sure you're wrong. Leonard is just in a hurry for some reason." Though, in her heart she knew that Sheldon was probably right.


	14. Chapter 14

**14**

When they arrived Penny started heading towards Sheldon's office when he stopped her.

"Penny, Gabelhauser arranged for me to move to larger quarters. Follow me to our new office suite."

Sheldon led her to a suite and opened the door. It was dark. Penny saw a large desk and some comfortable chairs.

"Sheldon, I think this office is actually smaller than your old office. And darker. I can't see how three of us will fit in here."

Sheldon moved further into the dark office, turned on some more lights and opened the three doors that suddenly became visible revealing three windowed offices that allowed sunlight to pour into the outer office.

"Okay, this is definitely bigger. Sheldon, how the heck did you wrangle this?"

"Penny, that is information you may not wish to have at the moment."

"Sheldon, what the heck is going on?"

"Missy?"

"Penny, trust me, you don't want to know this until you absolutely have to."

"It will be announced later this afternoon."

"What's gonna be announced, Sheldon? I'm not moving another inch until you tell me."

"That I have been awarded tenure."

"Sheldon, that's great. I was afraid when I saw the smaller office that you might have been demoted because of what went on over the summer. But tenure, wow."

"But, Penny…"

"Give her a minute, Sheldon…"

Sheldon and Missy watched Penny as she slowly came to a realization.

"Oh crap!"

"She got it."

"That means Leonard didn't get tenure. Crap. He was so absolutely sure. He figured the Hawking thing would have sealed the deal."

"Gabelhauser offered me tenure and I accepted a few days ago. He did not wish to make the formal announcement or inform the faculty and staff until I was fully back. There will be a small reception at 3. Apparently it is non-optional for me. Penny, if you wish you may go console Leonard and we can commence your employment tomorrow."

"No, Sheldon, I said I would work for you and work begins today. Besides, you said Leonard won't know about it until this afternoon. I'll just need to be at home when he gets there and prepare for a lot of crying."

"Penny, this is not a great tragedy. There's no need for you to cry."

"Oh, I don't expect to be the one crying. Though I guess I'll also need to stop by _Victoria's Secret_ on the way home. Um, Sheldon, I couldn't get an advance, could I?"

"Penny, if I am to understand what you are asking of me; you would like to get an advance on your paycheck which you have yet to earn, essentially a loan, so that you may purchase new lingerie to be used to distract your likely disconsolate fiancée from the fact that I received tenure and he did not with the prospect of coitus."

"Yup. That's about the size of it."

"Penny, Penny, Penny," Sheldon said as he gave Penny $200."

"Let us now get settled so Missy can go to her interview and we can find the baby's spot. Penny, this front area is yours during office hours. The office in the center will be yours for major projects and also store the baby's things. The office on the left will be Alex's and I will be in the main office on the right. I even have my own personal lavatory. Nobody's allowed in my lavatory. There is a crib and changing table in my office."

Penny looked shocked. "Sheldon, you are actually going to change the baby in your office? This I have to see."

"I was hoping that his meal schedule could be adjusted so that he doesn't evacuate his bowels until after he leaves for the day, but I suspect that may not be possible. I have already changed him a handful of times. I have a shipment of wipes, gloves, surgical masks, nose plugs, diapers and scented candles being delivered later today. I do hope the supply I brought from home is adequate until then."

Missy put her hand on Sheldon's arm. "Shelly, you'll be fine. Put the baby in the crib. Move the crib a little bit into the sun for warmth and let the baby go to sleep."

"But how do you know that is his spot?"

"Trust me. He's had a crazy morning. He rode in Penny's car. He met, Jesus save us, that guy Kripke. He will be asleep five minutes after you put him in the crib."

"Alright."

Missy unbuckled the Babybjorn and Sheldon gently placed the baby in the crib. Luckily Penny saw the moment coming and made sure to capture in on her phone camera.

"Okay, I'm goin' clear across campus to the Humanities Building. I'll call and let you know when I'm headed back, okay?"

"That'll be fine, sweetie. You go knock 'em dead!"

"Penny, how will they possibly hire Missy if she kills them. And the authorities will then be after her. What are you thinking?"

"Sheldon. It's an expression. Y'know, like "break a leg" or "merde" before a performance."

"Penny, those are theatrical superstitions. I know of no superstition or statement derived from one that is appropriate for a job interview."

"So I faked one. I just wanted Missy to go over there confidently."

"You should have said that. Remember, Missy is from Texas. When you tell someone from Texas to knock something dead, something tends to die."

"I'm sure Missy will be fine."

Missy headed out and sure enough, the baby was asleep in side of five minutes.

"Looks like Missy found his spot, alright."

"I'm not fully convinced. There is a possibility that there is another spot that would be conducive to his acquisition of sleep in even less time. Further investigation is merited."

"You could try just talking to him Sheldon. I know it's put me to sleep on a few occasions."

"Penny, I'm not certain you should speak to me thusly in a work paradigm."

"You're right, Sheldon. I apologize."

"Raj had some difficulty adjusting at first, but he and I developed a workday rapport over time. I'm certain we will do the same. And I accept there will be occasional missteps like just now. In fact it is preferable that those missteps happen when we are alone."

"Sheldon, I promise that if I misstep I will only do it to you."

"Um, with me, Penny."

"Sure."

"Once we are settled, there is some employment, payroll and insurance paperwork for you to fill out in your top desk drawer. I have pre-filled-in the information that I am aware of to save to you time. You may wish to review it but I am fairly certain that I have everything entered correctly."

"Thank you, Sheldon. That was very thoughtful of you. A little bit creepy but still very thoughtful."

"Please review it nonetheless. You have an appointment with Mrs. Davis in Human Resources at 1:30. If the paperwork is to your and her approval and you turn it in to her at that time, you will receive your first paycheck next Tuesday."

"That would be great."

"Now, I believe we are alright in terms of office supplies. You will find them in that cabinet across from your desk. Gabelhauser's secretary will be by at some point today to tell you how to get things we may still require. You will not want to have lunch with her, at least not yet. I believe it is better that you meet the various people in the department before you hear the gossip about them. And you should remember that your fiancée, your boss, and two of your friends are amongst those who get gossiped about. And considering our little situation, you should prepare to be the subject of some of the gossip."

"Sheldon, I thought this was a university. The way you're describing it makes it sound just like high school."

"Not having attended high school I'll have to take your work on that."

Penny unpacked most of the stuff they'd brought to the office as it was intended to stay there. Sheldon set up a group of brand new white boards in his office. As they were both starting to settle down the phone rang. First they both looked over at the sleeping baby to see if he woke up. He didn't. Then Sheldon looked toward Penny and after a couple of seconds she got it and picked up the phone.

"Good morning. Dr. Cooper's office. This is Penny."

Penny looked over at Sheldon and saw a little smile.

"I got the job!"

"Sheldon, it's Missy. She got the job."

"Please put Missy on speaker, Penny."

"Missy, I'm putting you on speaker. Congratulations."

"Yes. Congratulations, Missy."

"Thanks guys. Listen, I need to be here until around 3. Can y'all come over for lunch so I can feed the baby? My treat. Shelly, I inspected. It'll be okay for you to eat here. In fact, I think once you see this place you may never want to eat anywhere else again."

"Oh, I doubt that. But I am willing to visit this once. We will see you at noon."

"Okey-doke."

"Oh, I'm sorry Penny. I spoke without confirming that you wish to join us. Would you prefer to join Leonard for lunch?"

"Um, actually no. If I see him I'd have to tell him what I know about the tenure and stuff and I have a feeling there won't be any eating and lots of yelling and probably crying. Since I'm probably gonna get that tonight anyway why don't I just let it wait until then?"

"An eminently sensible plan. It will take us approximately 11 minutes to walk over there. We should prepare. I suspect we will be returning with the baby. Will you be able to remain at work until Missy has completed her business?"

"Sure. But I don't think it's a good idea for me to go to your reception."

"I agree. Additionally those affairs are usually quite boring. And the cake they serve tends to be a bit stale."

"You already know I'm proud of and happy for you and again I'd rather avoid the crying until I have to deal with it."

"Again, quite sensible. Let us proceed to lunch."


	15. Chapter 15

**15**

When Penny and Sheldon arrived at the Humanities cafeteria they were amazed. It was quite a bit larger than the one in the Physics Building and very modern. And instead of serving traditional cafeteria fare there were booths representing a variety of local restaurants, including The Cheesecake Factory, and serving their fare.

"Sheldon, almost all of the booths are Sheldon-approved restaurants."

Sheldon was dumbstruck.

"Look, there's Missy over at that table."

They wandered over to the table and Missy gestured for Sheldon to give her the baby who was just waking up. Missy looked like she was preparing to breastfeed him.

"Missy, I don't think you should expose yourself like that in public."

"Shelly, it's not against the rules. And besides, look around. There are at least three other women in here feedin' their little ones."

"Well I will sit on the same side of the table as you to block anyone from watching and so I do not have to watch myself."

"Shelly, this is a perfectly natural thing. I don't get why you still get embarrassed by it."

"Missy, Sheldon is doing pretty well if you ask me. He's still here. I figured he'd run out of the room."

"Okay I won't push it. Anyway, since I know time is limited I took the liberty of orderin' for you. I already ate."

"How did you know what I would like? Sheldon asked.

"Oh I took a guess. I think you'll like it. Now we usually don't have table service but bein' the new boss has its perks."

A young man approached them with a tray of food. Penny received a chicken Caesar salad and Sheldon got a barbecue bacon cheeseburger with barbecue sauce, bacon and cheese on the side. Each of them also got French fries and lemonade.

"Missy, I believe this may become my regular Monday lunch place."

"Thought you might like it."

"So when are you starting, Missy?"

"I kind of already have. The previous manager quit suddenly and they really need me."

"Missy, how will we manage child care? We can't impose on Penny. After all she has work to do for me."

"I know. Luckily, there's a child care center here in this building and I already signed us up. Unfortunately there's no space in the mornings yet but we're all set for the afternoons starting tomorrow. I can take breaks to feed him. We'll start mornings next week."

"Missy, I was looking forward to him spending time with me, um, us."

"Shelly, if you really want, I can leave him with you a couple of days a week. Is that okay?"

"That will be acceptable. And of course I will still need to inspect their facility."

"Of course. I already gave them a heads up."

Penny felt her phone vibrate. There was a text from Leonard.

**WANTED 2 SURPRISE U 4 LUNCH & SHELDON'S OFFICE IS EMPTY. WHERE R U? – L**

"Leonard's looking for me."

"How surprising." Sheldon responded with a possible hint of sarcasm.

**HAVING LUNCH AT HUMANITIES AT MISSY'S NEW WORK. - P**

"I'm not gonna say anything about the new office yet."

"Wise move."

**OK. I'LL COME OVER THERE. - L**

"He wants to come over."

"Tell him it's a working lunch. We're reviewing your duties."

"Good idea."

**WE'RE WORKING, LEONARD. CU 2NITE. - P**

**K – L**

"Unbelievable. I can tell from his text that he's sulking."

"Penny, Leonard is almost always sulking when you are not present."

"Awwww."

"I did not intend that comment to reflect well upon him."

"Well, it did anyway."

"Missy, are you satisfied with the conditions of your employment?"

"Sure am. They're payin' me more'n twice what I was gettin' at _Fuddruckers_. Of course, there's no tips here."

"That means you will be able to fully button up your blouse."

"Shelly, I wear my clothes this way because I like to, not because it gets me bigger tips. Except Penny and I both know that it also does do that. Don't we sweetie."

"Ummmm."

"Penny, do not act alarmed, but Leonard is over at the entrance to the cafeteria trying to not be observed. He must have run over here. He is utilizing his inhaler."

"I can't believe he's spying on me."

"Penny, are you truly surprised? There is a strong possibility that unattached males may be present here. Leonard's insecurities have come to the fore. He is likely here to, what was the term Missy taught me, to cock block."

"Sheldon, I already agreed to marry him. He can quit the jealousy crap."

"Penny, if he didn't quit the jealousy crap as you say when he was dating Leslie, or Stephanie, or Priya, why would Leonard do so now?"

"Fair point. But he really has to get past it. I made a commitment."

"Leonard has made multiple commitments. It has never stopped him from seeking to sample other wares. Especially yours."

"Sheldon, can we please drop it?"

"Alright. It looks as though he is sneaking away in any case."

"Good."

"Penny, we will need to leave shortly if you are to finish reviewing your paperwork and meet with Mrs. Davis."

"Okay, Sheldon. And speaking of that paperwork, how did you know exactly how much I weighed this morning to the ounce?"

"I am a physicist, Penny. I know everything."

"Yeah, and you didn't have to mention my tattoo, especially since you only know about one of them."

"You have not seen fit to share the other with me and I have no independent corroboration that it indeed exists."

"Oh, Cookie Monster exists all right. Just ask your ex-roommate."

"Penny, must I? It would only start another tiresome argument."

"Okay, just forget that I said that."

"If only I could."


	16. Chapter 16

**16**

On their way back over to the Physics Building with the baby after lunch, Penny decided to bring up something that she was curious about.

"Sheldon, please forgive me if I'm asking something inappropriate, but we're not in the office right now so I figure I can ask, what exactly did you do all summer? I mean, I know you were at home for part of it, but I get the feeling you also did other stuff"

"Penny, I appreciate that you are not asking me this where we could be overheard by colleagues or friends, for I'm not certain I want my summer of exploration to be spoken of by others quite yet."

"Summer of exploration?"

"It's a working title. A placeholder. I'm certain I'll think of something better for inclusion in my memoirs."

"Right."

"In any case, I began my sojourn, as you surmised, at home in Galveston. When I left Pasadena I was very confused. Nothing was as it should have been and I was uncertain how to react or proceed. Adding to that Amy seemed to be taking advantage of my situation to press for an advancement of our relationship paradigm and possible cohabitation. I needed to return home to my family. By the time I arrived I was spent. And then I discovered my mother had dragged MeeMaw with her to some kind of church retreat. I don't even remember how I got to Missy's doorstep but when she found me I could not even explain myself."

"The next thing I knew, Mommy was making fried chicken and then later singing me "Soft Kitty." That night I had the best REM cycle I'd had in months. And over time I slowly regained my strength. One evening, about 2 weeks after I got home Missy just asked me "What happened?" I told her everything. I then showed her my daily notes and we discussed them. Well, discussed would be the polite term. Missy became quite agitated. She said some very impolite things about Amy's actions and, when we reviewed them, Leonard's. To be quite honest, you did not fare well in those discussions either. It was quite interesting to hear Missy's perspective since you know that she is much more socially adept than I. And I soon found I was able to gain some perspective also."

"Sounds intense."

"I suppose it was. A great benefit came from it though."

"Yeah?"

"As you know, though we are twins, Missy and I are not very similar at all and we have, for the most part not been terribly close and followed our own paths. My situation has allowed Missy and I to not only become a better brother and sister but to actually become friends. I am very grateful for that."

"Missy kind of said the same thing to me. I'm really happy for you guys."

"In any case. Once I had regained my strength and stamina I decided to recharge my intellectual batteries, as it were. Since my own area of concentration was in flux, and as I have always had standing offers of employment from a number of institutions and think tanks around the country, I decided to visit as many as I could and discuss my situation with as many colleagues as I could so that I could formulate a plan of action based on as much information as possible. And happily I was able to travel to almost all of my destinations by train."

"That all sounds very sensible, Sheldon."

"It should. It was _my_ plan. I was able to follow this plan for approximately nine weeks when Missy told me about, I'm sorry I won't even use his name, her husband's email. I immediately cancelled the remainder of my itinerary and returned to help care for her and my nephew and help her formulate her own plan of action."

"Wow, Sheldon, I gotta say that I am really proud of you. You did exactly the right thing. The whole time. And I'm gonna ask you something though I pretty much think I know the answer."

"Then why ask?"

"Because I think I need to hear you say it. You don't think any of us could have helped you the way you needed to be helped, do you?"

"I'm sorry to say no. In reviewing the situation with Missy, we were able to conclude that my friends in Pasadena were actually making the situation worse for me."

"I think I understand, Sheldon. I'm so very sorry that I contributed to what happened."

"It wasn't your fault, Penny. It wasn't really any individual's fault, though a great deal of my discomfort was due to Amy Farrah Fowler. I believe that we have assembled a group of friends who are, by and large, quite dysfunctional as a group. We have all placed the comfort level of our group above the comfort of any individual in it. The group pressed me to be with Amy so I was with Amy. The group pressed for you to be back together with Leonard. You are back together with Leonard. Raj is being influenced to move things along with Emily. And soon they too will be aligned. I do not wish to be part of a collective of couples, Penny. While I am willing to attempt to take others into account as I determine the direction of my life I will not allow others determine that direction. The group seemed to be much more invested in my relationship with Amy than I was. And Amy was determined to have me make a commitment I have no interest in making. Missy helped me see that I need to be in control of my future and for now that future does not include a romantic relationship of any kind until other things are more settled."

"So you think that once you're in better shape at work you might get back together with Amy?"

"No. We want different things. Amy seems to view me as a project whose completion will result in her lifelong happiness. I have no desire to take on that responsibility. And I have no interest in Amy physically despite the number of examples of physical closeness she demanded of me. I feel nothing but friendship for Amy and, at the moment, precious little of that. I am open to someday possibly falling in love and having a physical relationship with a woman. Just not now and not Amy Farrah Fowler."

"One more question, since we're almost at the building. Is Missy here to help you or are you helping Missy?"

"Both. I'll admit that I seriously considered not ever returning. I was prepared to send Leonard the PDFs for packing my belongings on a number of occasions but Missy convinced me that a Cooper does not just accept defeat and that I should come back and rebuild my life as I wish it to be. And she kindly offered to come back with me and aid me in that endeavor. Concurrently, I offered Missy the opportunity to rebuild her life as a single mother with my assistance and support. We are going to help and support each other."

"So, Sheldon, will me and Leonard be part of your new life."

"Penny, you will always be a part of my life. A very, very important part."

A tear started to fall from Penny's eye. But she did notice that Sheldon pointedly did not include Leonard in his reaponse.

"I'm gonna hug you Sheldon. Just a warning. I'm gonna hug you really tight."

"Penny, please be careful of the baby."

_A/N: I rarely write about process but this chapter was a bitch to write and I'm still not sure I got it right._

_While I'm here I want to thank you all for your reviews and follows. I'm especially happy to see a lot of screen names that I've not seen before. Welcome to The Big Bang Theory Multiverse. I hope you enjoy your stay._


	17. Chapter 17

**17**

Just before three Missy returned to Sheldon's office. She and Penny organized the baby's things for the trip back to North Los Robles. Luckily, most of what they brought that morning would remain in the office.

"Sheldon, are you okay with me leaving now?"

"Penny, you have already worked over two hours longer than we initially expected you would. Additionally, with this reception I am required to attend I suspect little additional work would be done today in any case. I will find my own way home, likely with Koothrapali or by bus."

"Don't wanna ride with a pouting Leonard, huh?"

"Not particularly."

"I guess I understand."

"So you will return home and prepare to distract Leonard from his complaining."

"That's what I do."

"Penny, if you require respite…"

"Sheldon, I suspect you won't see me again until breakfast. I'll text you if I think you'll need your noise-cancelling headphones."

"Penny, Penny, Penny."

"Bye, Shelly. Give me a call when you leave and let me know how you're gettin' home. I'll order your Thai food for ya. If Raj is driving you can pick it up. If you take the bus I'll have it delivered."

"That will be acceptable. Have a safe journey home."

Once Penny, Missy and the baby were on the road Missy decided to find a way to broach a sensitive subject.

"So, Penny, did you look at all those insurance options they offered?"

"Sure did. I haven't had any insurance in years and was lucky enough to not really need it much. Now I guess I don't have to be so worried about getting sick."

"But it's a lot more than that. I get to insure the baby and make sure that he gets checked up regular. And I get to do the same for myself. As soon as it's all set up I'm goin' in for a full check up. The baby too. You should think about that."

"Well, since it's mostly free, I guess I should."

"Penny, you probably saw that more than just basic doctor and hospital visits are covered, right."

"Yeah, I kind of glossed over that. I mean, besides a regular doctor and a gynecologist, what else would I need?"

"Well, one of the things I'm gonna consider is maybe seein' a therapist. With the baby's dad splittin' and me movin' and a new job and, to be honest, livin' with my brother, I'm gonna need someone to talk to about stuff."

"You have me."

"And I appreciate that. I really do. I hope we get to become good, good friends, Penny. But sometimes I think I need to speak to someone who's not in the middle of the same bunch of people I am. Someone who can maybe help with some perspective? You know what I mean?"

"Yeah. I guess I do. Sometimes I give one of my friends advice and five minutes later I'm getting complaints from a another one of my friends about what I said."

"Yeah, that can really suck. Did you ever think about seein' someone, Penny?"

"Me see a therapist? Why? My life is going pretty good right now."

"Really? You're about to spend your night screwin' Leonard silly not because you want to but because you need to distract him from his friend getting' somethin' he really wants. Does that sound pretty good?"

"When you put it that way, not so much."

"And Penny, I've only been here for a few days, but almost every time I've seen you you've had a drink in your hand. I'm thinkin' that maybe you aren't as happy as you'd like to think you are."

"Yeah, well things have been a little stressful."

"Sweetie, you're comin' off three months without my brother around. I love him to pieces but he can be a handful. I know it. You've had space and time with your fiancée, who you say you love, but you're still not exactly happy. Am I right?"

"Kinda."

"How do you expect to fix that? As you get closer to a wedding things are only gonna get more stressful. And now that you've got a new job and you and Leonard are together in that tiny apartment… Sweetie, you're gonna need some help. I know Leonard sees a shrink. Why shouldn't you?"

"Maybe I should ask Leonard to set me up with his guy."

"No. No. No. No. NO! You do _not_ go to the same shrink. I know that much. You find your own. You check around, figure out who's available in our network and you go interview them. When you find someone you think you can work with you set it up. I'll help you because I'll be doin' the very same thing."

"I don't know."

"Sweetie, we've known each other for a while but we don't really _know_ each other. Between the first time I met you and now somethin' changed."

"A lot changed, Missy. It's been years. There's Leonard. And other stuff."

"Yeah. I know. But another thing I know is that you are not happy. Oh you know how to act happy and you know how to make other people happy, especially Leonard, but you, you're just passing."

"I don't know."

"Sweetie, just join me on this little search. And let's make it our secret, okay?"

"You're probably right about that. If Leonard finds out I'm thinking about therapy he'll take over the whole thing and take it personally at the same time."

"You know him better than I do."

"So how do we start this?"

"I've got my own appointment with Human Resources tomorrow. I'll ask. And we'll take it from there. Okay?"

"Sure. But we still have to hit _Victoria's Secret_ on the way home, okay?"

"I'm not sure I want to take the baby into a place like that."

"It's okay. I can run in pretty quick and find something Leonard will like for all of the five minutes I'll be wearing it."

"Penny!"

"Missy, we both know what's going to happen."

"Yeah, we do. I guess we'll need to stop at the liquor store too."

"You read my mind."


	18. Chapter 18

**18**

_A few hours later, in apartment 4B_

Leonard shambled into the apartment, a very dour look on his face. Penny immediately came over to him to give him a kiss hello.

"Hi, sweetie."

"Do you know what happened today? Do you? Of course you do. You work for him."

"A lot of things happened today, sweetie. It was my first day of work."

"Yeah well the university gave Sheldon tenure. Sheldon Fucking Cooper! After pretty much going nuts they went and rewarded him. Maybe that's what I oughtta do."

"Sweetie, Sheldon has been at the university longer than you and he's worked very hard for a very long time. He deserves to be recognized."

"And I don't? I went to the freaking Arctic with him. What a nightmare! And I spent four freaking months on a boat for Stephen Hawking. That should have guaranteed me tenure. Hell, they should have made me the head of the department!"

"Leonard, sweetie, you'll have your chance. There'll be other opportunities."

"Not for at least another year. And that means I won't be getting a raise. We'll be stuck in this place for another year at least. This was supposed to be temporary."

"I thought you liked living here with me."

"I love living with you. I'd just rather it be in a bigger place. And away from him. He was really selfish not letting us have the bigger apartment. That's so typical of him. So what was going on with you and him at lunch, anyway? I saw you."

"We were doing exactly what I said I was doing. And don't think I didn't see you skulking around at the cafeteria. What the hell's the deal with following me around anyway?"

"I wanted to make sure you were doing okay. I got worried when I saw Sheldon's empty old office. So now he's probably got a better office too, doesn't he?"

"Kinda?"

"So what did they do, set him up sharing a big office with Alex and you're out in the hallway?"

"Um, not exactly."

"So?"

"Leonard, are you sure you want to talk about this? I wanted to celebrate my first day of work. I made us a special dinner, cheeseless lasagna, and I picked up a special wine and I have a surprise for you a little later…"

"Tell me about Sheldon's new office, Penny."

"Okay, fine. Sheldon has an office suite with a reception area and three individual offices. It's pretty nice."

"See! That should have been my office."

"Leonard, he got moved there mainly because he had me and Alex working with him plus the baby. He needed more space."

"I could have needed more space."

"Leonard, you think maybe you're acting a little childish?"

"You're taking his side. You're engaged to me and you're taking his side."

"Leonard, there aren't sides here. Sheldon got a promotion and you didn't. Big deal. It happens. There was this one time at The Cheesecake Factory…"

"I don't need to hear about The Cheesecake Factory."

"So are you just going to pout like a little baby all night?"

"If that's what I feel like doing, yes."

"And I'm supposed to just sit here and watch."

"Yes, that's exactly what you're supposed to do. And be supportive. And then later, you get to put me in a better mood."

"What?" Penny glared at Leonard.

"What do you mean what?"

"You know, I _did_ have plans for us later but maybe I should reschedule them. It looks like maybe you should prepare to _stay_ in the mood you're in."

"What?"

"If I want to see a baby pouting I'd rather go across the hall to see Missy and the baby."

"And Sheldon."

"He's not home yet."

"He will be."

"Good night, Leonard. I'll see you later. Maybe."

"What does that mean?"

"Oh, figure it out. If you can't maybe that's another reason you didn't get tenure."


	19. Chapter 19

**19**

Missy opened the door after Penny knocked.

"Penny, I didn't think we'd be seein' you tonight."

"Hi Missy. Yeah. Well, there's someone else who won't be seeing me tonight. Any of me."

"Sweetie, are you okay?"

"Yes. No. I don't know. I really don't."

"You know what I have to do now."

"Yeah. Peppermint tea, please."

Penny and Missy continued talking while Missy prepared the tea.

"I should be happy, shouldn't I? I'm engaged to a nice guy. I finally have a decent job."

"And?"

"Is this just an older, more mature version of happy? Because it kinda sucks."

"Penny, we've talked about this. A coupla times. You keep insisting things are good. Your own word."

"Yeah. Maybe you should probably stop listening to me."

"What do you want to do? Do you want to get drunk? I'll go out with you once Shelly gets home. I don't think he'll let us drink here."

"Probably not. Missy what am I going to do?"

"Penny, you know us Coopers are a blunt people. Now, I'm not a doctor. But you, girl, are depressed. And I'm not talkin' "Boohoo, I didn't get asked to the prom" depressed. I'm talkin' worse. Depression that won't let you do anything to fix your situation. Time and a chocolate sundae won't fix that. I think you find yourself a therapist right quick and you and them figure what else you do after that. Sheldon and I will do whatever we can to help. I promise."

"Okay. Should I tell Leonard that I'm doing this?"

"That's your call. But do you think he'll help or hinder your decision?"

"You're right. I'll tell him once I'm all set up."

"Penny, there's somethin' else I'm gonna say. You're definitely not gonna like it."

"Shoot."

"What are you holding in your right hand and what are you holding in your left?"

Penny was suddenly aware that she had a goblet of wine in one hand and the half-filled bottle in the other.

"Shit."

"I hate to say it but I think you might have a drinking problem."

"Part of me wants to argue with you and say it's just been a stressful day but I'd be lying. This could be any day. Every day. What's happening to me?"

Penny began to cry and Missy swept her up in her arms.

"There. There."

Through the tears Penny thought, "Of course they react to someone in tears the same way. They're twins raised by the very same mother."

Just then Sheldon came through the door with dinner.

"Koothrapali's car stank of McNuggets…" Sheldon immediately saw Missy comforting a weeping Penny."

"Penny. What's wrong?"

"Shelly, I'll fill you in later. For now just go brew another pot of peppermint tea. Okay?"

Penny looked Missy in the eye. She whispered "Thank you. I don't think I could deal with him on this right now."

"It's okay sweetie. I'll take care of my brother. Do you want to stay over here tonight?"

"I'd like that. The couch'll be fine."

"I've got a big bed. How about we share? We can talk all night if you like."

"But what about the baby?"

"It's a blessing that that baby could sleep through the apocalypse. No need to worry. I'll probably just need to feed him sometime during the night, but you've already seen that show."

"Okay."

"Shelly, Penny's staying over. She's gonna need one of your super-hero shirts to sleep in."

"She'll stretch it in odd places."

"Sheldon, Penny is your guest."

"Oh, all right."

"I'll buy you a new one, Sheldon. I'll take you to the comic shop on Wednesday and get you a new one."

"Oh, I hadn't even thought about new comic book day. Has Stuart reopened his comic book shop?"

"He did. He was closed for a couple of months doing renovations but he found some guy to partner with him on the store so between the insurance money and the new partner the store is better than ever. And he did a bunch of publicity about reopening and he's actually doing better business. At least Raj told me he was."

"That is gratifying to hear. I like Stuart's store. I accept your offer. Do you have a particular hero's emblem you'd like to wear?"

"You have to ask?"

"Penny, I have no Wonder Woman shirts."

"Flash, Sheldon. I'd like to wear Flash."

"Alright."

"Wait. Sheldon, never mind. Missy, can you go across the hall with me so I can grab some clothes for tomorrow? I'd rather not deal with any more of Leonard's crap alone."

"Sure."

Sheldon looked in on the baby while Missy and Penny went across the hall. Leonard looked up as they entered.

"About time you got back. Oh, hello Missy. Can you excuse us? Penny and I need to talk."

"Not in the mood, Leonard. I'm staying with Missy tonight. I'm a little tired of your _me, me, me_ act tonight and I'm _really_ not in the mood anymore to reward it. I'm just getting some clothes for work tomorrow."

Penny headed into the bedroom with Missy following. Leonard stood in the doorway.

"Penny, it's just a little misunderstanding. I promise I'll stop. You can stay here tonight."

"Fine. So where will you be staying, Leonard?"

"Here, with you, like every night."

"Wrong answer. Missy, I think I have what I need. Let's go."

"Penny. It's just a misunderstanding."

"Good night, Leonard."

After they got out the door, Penny sighed with relief.

"You okay?"

"Not really. I'm just a little surprised that the first thought I had when I just saw Leonard wasn't _Here's my supportive fiancée who I've decided to spend my life with_ but it was _Oh my God, what have I done?_"

"Yeah, well we've been through part of that. I'm not sure we should continue talkin' about this in front of my brother. At least not yet."

"Yeah, I get that. But tomorrow we start on my therapy project."

"Yup."

As they returned to 4A, Sheldon called over from the kitchen.

"Penny, an appropriate Flash t-shirt is on Missy's dresser. If you are still staying the night, your assigned bathroom time is 6:45."

"Thank you, Sheldon. I hope I'm not inconveniencing either of you."

"You are not. It has been a long day and we have much to do tomorrow. I'm going to retire now. Good night, Penny. Good night, Missy."

"Good night, Sheldon," Penny and Missy replied in unison.

"So, Penny, what do you want to do now?"

"Y'know, I'm kind of pooped myself. It's been a really long day. I'm gonna turn in. You?"

"I gotta do a couple of things for the baby and then I'll join ya. If you're still up we can talk a little more."

"Okay."

After Missy finished up she went into her room to find Penny fast asleep in the large bed. She changed and crawled in with her. Penny slept through the 2am feeding.

Penny opened her eyes early the next morning and found herself tangled in the covers with Missy. She was having some trouble extricating herself when Missy started to stir.

"Mornin'."

"Um, Missy, nothing happened, did it?"

"Don't get your panties in a bunch, Penny. Looks like we're just a couple of cuddlers and that's what we did. Me, I kinda liked it. You feelin' better?"

"Well, I slept pretty good so, yeah."

"So we confirmed that we're not sleepwalking lesbians. I guess it's probably time to get up. You know how my brother gets if the bathroom schedule gets thrown off."

"Yeah, I got less than a minute to get in there. See you in a bit."


	20. Chapter 20

**20**

_At CalTech_

Penny was settling in at her desk the next morning when she looked up and found Amy Farrah Fowler staring at her.

"Oh. Hi Amy."

"Sheldon didn't inform me that he would be employing you Penny."

"Yeah, I guess he's been busy, Amy."

"I would like to speak with him. Is he in?"

"Sorry, Amy. He in a big meeting with President Seibert. Seems there's some kind of crisis. He hasn't clued me in as to what it might be."

"Alright then. I shall await his return in his office."

"Sorry, Amy. You'll have to wait out here. The baby's sleeping in Sheldon's office."

"That seems rather inefficient. Why does Sheldon not require Missy to take advantage of childcare available elsewhere? I was certain that his sibling's progeny would cause problems for Sheldon."

"Amy, the baby is sleeping in Sheldon's office because Sheldon wants him there. He's over at the childcare center this afternoon and most mornings but Sheldon wants him to be here at least a couple of days a week. That's not Missy imposing. That's Sheldon insisting."

"I find that difficult to believe. Sheldon has never evidenced any interest in infants of any kind with the exception of koalas. As I have only previously seen the infant for a moment I would like to look in on it to see what might fascinate Sheldon so."

"Okay. But please be quiet."

Penny tiptoed into Sheldon's office and Amy followed, not making any effort to mute her footsteps.

Amy leaned over the crib and the baby immediately woke up and started crying. Not a little, either. Out and out bawling. Penny quickly picked him up and began to comfort him but it was to no avail. He kept crying. Amy backed away from the crib and towards Sheldon's desk. Even though her attention was on the crying baby, out of the corner of her eye Penny saw Amy turn her back to her and begin to pick up Sheldon's stapler.

"Put it back, Amy."

"I was just…"

"Put. It. Back."

"But Penny…"

"If you lick anything on Sheldon's desk or in this office I will rip your tongue out of your mouth. Put the stapler down."

"You didn't seem to have an issue with my behavior before."

"And that's my bad. I think maybe you should either make an appointment to see Sheldon and leave or just leave, Amy."

"Sheldon and I are in a relationship, just as you and Leonard are, Penny. You should respect that."

"According to Sheldon that is no longer the case. Now please leave so I can take care of the baby."

"So you are actually more of a wet nurse than an assistant, eh, Penny?"

"Amy, what exactly are you doing here?"

"I have been quite clear that I am unwilling to allow Sheldon to toss aside our relationship like a dirty sock. I came to give him an ultimatum."

"Yeah, well that's between you and Sheldon. Now either make an appointment or leave."

"I choose to depart. I will telephone Sheldon later. You may tell him I came by."

"Oh, I'll tell him all right."

"Penny, as my _bestie_ I presume you will exhibit the appropriate discretion."

"Yeah. Whatever."

The moment Amy Farrah Fowler exited the office suite the baby calmed down. Inside of five minutes he was asleep again.

"Wow. This kid does not like Amy."

Penny replaced the baby in his crib and went back out to her desk just as Sheldon returned.

"Penny, is everything alright?"

"It is now. Amy dropped by."

"And?"

"Funniest thing. You know how the baby almost never cries."

"Indeed. I've found it most surprising and gratifying."

"Well, apparently that changes when Amy's around."

"Really?"

"I know. As soon as he saw her he started up. And loud. Soon as she left it was like she was never here. Quiet as an angel."

"Why was Amy here?"

"To see you. I told her to make an appointment but she said she'd call."

"I see no reason to speak with her. I was quite clear. Anything else?"

"Nothing critical. So what's with the big emergency meeting?"

"I'm not permitted to discuss it yet. Some men will be here shortly to see me. I will use Alex's office so as not to disturb the baby."

"Okay. Is it related to the meeting?"

"It is and I am permitted to say no more. However, you may wish to consider staying with Missy and I again this evening."

"What's going on, Sheldon?"

Just then two men in black suits appeared. Sheldon acknowledged their presence and gestured to them to follow him. He looked quite serious.

"Gentlemen. Please accompany me."

Sheldon closed the door behind him.

"Wow," Penny thought, "whatever is going on must be big."

Just then Leonard suddenly appeared in front of her holding bodega flowers and candy.

Nervously, he began "Um, hi Penny. I came by to apologize for last night. It was really self-centered of me. You wanted to celebrate your first day of work and I kept talking about my problems. I'm sorry."

"Thank you, Leonard."

"So, these are the new offices. Pretty nice."

"We're getting used to them. Things should settle down next week when Alex gets here."

"So, you and Alex working together, huh?"

"I don't see any problems between me and Alex. I like Alex."

"Okay. I just thought…"

"What did you think, Leonard?"

"Um, so where's Sheldon? I haven't really had a chance to congratulate him on the tenure thing and the new office."

"Sheldon's meeting back there with a couple of guys in suits. He wouldn't tell me what about."

Leonard looked nervous.

"Um, I've gotta go. See you tonight. Bye."

Leonard looked scared. Penny started to get worried.


	21. Chapter 21

**21**

Once seated in Alex's future office, the FBI agents began interviewing Sheldon.

"Dr. Cooper, I presume you understand why we are meeting with you."

"You are seeking to confirm certain information found on the blog of a former North Korean intelligence agent with whom I am passingly familiar."

"Yes. Please tell us about any encounters you had with Joyce Kim."

"There was but one encounter. One evening I became aware that my roommate, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, was engaging in coitus…"

"Coitus?"

"Sexual congress."

"Oh. Please continue."

"Leonard was engaging in coitus with someone without the prior notice specified in our Roommate Agreement."

"Roommate Agreement?"

"A contract binding two unrelated individuals sharing an apartment, in this case my apartment."

"Please go on."

"I knocked on Leonard's bedroom door and entered whereupon I found him and a woman he later identified as Joyce Kim _in flagrante delicto_. Finding offense, I assume, at my presence, Ms. Kim then scampered away in her underthings."

"And that is your only encounter with Ms. Kim."

"My only in-person encounter, yes."

"Were you ever aware of there being any _quid pro quo_ involved in Dr. Hofstadter and Ms. Kim's encounter?"

"I am only acquainted with such things as I have witnessed them in the relationships of others. I can only assume that there must have been some sort of arrangement because otherwise I cannot understand the attraction of Joyce Kim to Dr. Hofstadter."

"Is he not your longtime roommate and friend?"

"He was indeed my longtime roommate until only recently. As to our friendship, I believe the two of us define the term differently."

"Dr. Cooper, we could never actually prove that Dr. Hofstadter removed classified materials, for example a sample of top-secret rocket fuel, from his lab. It was subsequently discovered that the fuel leaves no trace once ignited."

"That could prove quite useful."

"It has. However, we are reasonably certain he did remove the fuel and subsequently blew up your elevator. We are unwilling to accept this as mere coincidence."

"I really can't speak to that. All that I am aware of is that a home experiment went horribly awry and we were unable to completely remove it from the premises in time. I hope you won't be saying anything to our landlord."

"We have no reason to. There is no proof. However, now that Ms. Kim is blogging about the situation it has become quite a problem for the government, the university and ultimately Dr. Hofstadter. He was apparently making arrangements to share top secret materials with a foreign national in exchange for, what was that word you used, ah yes, coitus."

"Over the years that I have lived with Dr, Hofstadter I have learned that he is an adequate scientist not terribly interested in expanding the boundaries of his discipline. However, he has always been interested in expanding his carnal horizons. And many scientists deal with foreign nationals like Ms. Kim as a regular part of their process. We have a number of foreign nationals in our student body. I have scientist friend who receives all of her funding from a foreign national."

"Who would that be?"

"Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, an eminent neurobiologist, receives her funding from a Saudi Arabian prince named Faisal."

"Faisal? You're sure?"

"That is his name. Is there a problem?"

"Not your concern, Dr. Cooper."

"Dr. Cooper, you understand that you may not share anything we discuss with anyone."

"I am."

"Thank you for you assistance. If we have further questions we'll be in touch."


	22. Chapter 22

**22**

After about an hour Alex's office door opened and Sheldon escorted the two suited men to the suite entrance.

"If you require any further information I will be happy to supply it."

"Thank you Dr. Cooper. We appreciate your cooperation in this matter."

After the men left Sheldon looked at Penny like he wanted to say something.

"Sheldon, what's going on?"

Sheldon closed and locked the door to the suite.

"Penny, what I am about to tell you is confidential and a bit alarming."

"Okay?"

"Do you know of Leonard's carnal dalliance with a Joyce Kim?"

"Yeah, she was a grad student that Leonard almost had coitus with before we met."

"Thank you for using the correct terminology for the office environment, Penny. But there is a bit more to the story. A short time after that encounter Joyce Kim was revealed to be a North Korean spy seeking a sample of a top-secret rocket fuel that Leonard was in possession of. My interruption of their potential coitus subverted her plan and she returned to North Korea in disgrace."

"That's the same rocket fuel that blew up the elevator, right?"

"Essentially, yes."

"So what's the deal now? It's like, what, ten years later."

"Indeed. Apparently Joyce Kim found her way out of North Korea and recently began blogging about her exploits hoping to secure a publishing deal. Leonard's name came up in her blog. That alarmed the FBI who in turn alarmed the President of the university."

"So what's going on? Leonard didn't do anything wrong, did he?"

"Joyce Kim's assertion that Leonard was willing to share a top secret item with her in exchange for coitus has the university and a number of government agencies that provide funding for research here quite worried. The FBI has interviewed everyone who was present at the time and will be interviewing Leonard shortly."

"Sheldon, what's gonna happen to him?"

"Leonard's security clearance could be in peril. However, if Leonard's continued presence here threatens any of the university's funding Leonard could be dismissed. I suspect he may at least be temporarily suspended from his duties until a determination is made. Or he could receive a mere slap on the wrist."

"Sheldon, I think I need to go to Leonard."

"Penny, the FBI agents who just left my office were on their way to see him now. I doubt you will be able to see him for quite a while."

"What am I supposed to do?"

"Continue as you have. I will be informed of what is officially happening as soon as it happens. I will immediately pass along to you whatever information I can."

"Thank you, Sheldon."

_Meanwhile, across campus at the Humanities cafeteria_

Missy saw Amy Farrah Fowler march into her cafeteria.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I am here to demand that you cease objecting to my union with your brother and interfering with my happiness. I have secured a new apartment just a few blocks from 2311 North Los Robles. I would be willing to sign it over to you and even pay your rent for a time until you are able to handle it yourself or you ultimately decide to return home to Texas."

"Not gonna happen."

"I can see what you are doing, Missy. You are attempting to make Sheldon the primary caregiver for your progeny and surround him with women more comely than I in an effort to deflect his affection from me."

"Amy, I don't need to deflect Sheldon's attentions from you. He simply doesn't care about you any more."

"I am a more appropriate match for Sheldon than any other women he has met or will meet."

"Amy, love is not some kind of silly equation. Just because it works on paper doesn't mean it works in real life. I get that you really want Sheldon for some reason. But you need to understand that it isn't mutual and that nagging Sheldon to commit to you won't make it mutual. It only makes you look needy and creepy. There's someone special out there for Sheldon, someone that really gets his motor running and accepts him for who he is, and that someone just isn't you."

"Sheldon's work at CalTech is unfocused. His roommate is moving on with his life. There is no longer anything for Sheldon in Pasadena except me. I'm certain he returned for me. He knows that I can make him into the successful scientist and man he is destined to be. That proves that Sheldon loves me."

"He wasn't going to come back to Pasadena at all, Amy. He was gonna walk away. He had offers from universities and think tanks all over the world. I convinced him to come back here and face his shitstorm of a life and take control of it. To make it work _for_ him instead of against him. To help him get what he really wants. I promised that I would be here for him as long as he needs me. And there _are_ gonna be some changes. Some of you folks ain't gonna like 'em. Some of you ain't gonna like 'em one bit. And I'm not goin' anywhere. I have a good job. I have a nice place to live. My brother and I are closer than we've been since the womb. My baby loves him and he loves my baby. We _are_ a family. And you have no place in it. Besides, accordin' to Shelly don't you have a fiancée somewhere in the Middle East?"

"His name is Faisal and he resides in Saudi Arabia. And we have a business arrangement for my research."

"Oh is _that_ what they call it now?"

"What are you implying?"

"I'm not implying. I'm inferring. I knew that Word-a-Day Calendar would come in handy!"

"There is nothing untoward between myself and Faisal. Our betrothal is just a business necessity."

"Girl, your whole deal is untoward. And sooner or later it's gonna blow up in your face. And that ain't gonna happen anywhere near Shelly."

"So you are saying that if I sever ties with Faisal my relationship with Sheldon may proceed?"

"I said nothin' of the kind. I am never givin' you the okay to be with my brother. I don't even want you in the same room with him without a witness."

"Then I see no further point to this discussion."

"I coulda told you that. I did tell you that. Now get the hell out of my cafeteria."


	23. Chapter 23

**23**

After work, Penny drove home. She asked Raj to give Sheldon, Missy and the baby a ride home. She was worried about Leonard. A little after six Leonard strode into their apartment.

"Hi honey. I'm home."

"Hi, sweetie. Are you okay?"

Leonard answered nervously. "Sure. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well I saw those FBI men going all over the building today. I know Sheldon was nervous."

"Maybe Sheldon has something to be nervous about. I spoke to them for a while today and we're meeting again tomorrow. I'm pretty sure that this is all just a big misunderstanding. Everything will be worked out."

"Leonard, I remember you telling me about Joyce Kim."

"Penny, I can't talk about anything the FBI asked me about. Not even to you."

"Aren't you worried?"

"Why should I be? It's just a misunderstanding."

"But Leonard, I remember you telling me that you took the rocket fuel and you _were_ going to show it to her."

"But Sheldon interrupted us and I didn't. So no harm. No foul. It's like it never happened."

"It blew up the elevator. I've been climbing stairs for years because of it."

"Climbing stairs is good exercise."

"Leonard, what's going to happen with your job?"

"Nothing. I'll be fine. You'll see. And next year I'll finally get tenure and we'll move to our own house in the suburbs and we'll have the life we dreamed of."

"That you dreamed of," Penny said _sotto voce_.

"What was that?" asked Leonard.

"Nothing. Never mind. What do you want for dinner?"

"Hmmmm. It's Tuesday. How about going to The Cheesecake Factory without Sheldon?"

"Fine."


	24. Chapter 24

**24**

_The next day_

"Hello. Dr. Cooper's office. This is Penny."

"Penny?"

"Hello?"

"It's Wil Wheaton. I just heard about Sheldon getting tenure and I called to congratulate him. Are you working for him now?"

"Yup."

"Oh yeah, I also heard about you and Leonard getting engaged. Congratulations."

"Thanks, Wil. Um, Sheldon is out of the office. Can I tell him you called?"

"Sure. Listen, I'd like to take you guys to lunch to celebrate. What do you think?"

"Sounds great. I'll run it by Sheldon and Leonard and let you know when would be good."

"Great. Um, while I have you there's another thing."

"Yeah?"

"I'm still sorry the whole thing with that gorilla movie happened. I'm sure you'll get another shot."

"Not doing the acting thing any more, Wil. I'm getting married and I'm working for Sheldon. That's about it."

"Penny, you're talented. You shouldn't waste that."

"Lots of people out here are talented. I gave it a shot and it didn't happen for me. I'm moving on."

"Penny, you're making a mistake. Listen, you know I'm doing a show on the SyFy Channel?"

"Sheldon mentioned it. I'm sorry I haven't had a chance to watch yet. I DVR'd all the episodes."

"Well, the suits said I need to find a co-host for the next series of shows. A girl co-host. I looked at the _Fun with Flags_ thing you did with Sheldon. I want you to come in for an audition next week."

"Wil, I'm through with all that. Besides, I have a full-time job now."

"Penny, we shoot the show at night. I've got other stuff going on too so rehearsals are in the late afternoons and evenings. If you get the job, and I can pretty much guarantee you have a good shot at getting it, we'll work around your schedule. Besides, I can't imagine Sheldon standing in your way. Leonard, yes. But not Sheldon."

"Okay. I'll do the audition and we'll see after that. Is there a script?"

"Not really. The producers are looking for chemistry and the ability to improvise. And to look good doing it."

"Well, I guess I can pull that off. Send me the information and I'll see you next week."

"Okay. See you then."

"Hmmm. That was interesting," Penny thought. "Well, no reason to say anything to Leonard unless it turns into a thing. Besides, he's got enough to think about."


	25. Chapter 25

**25**

The week proceeded and Penny got more settled in her duties. She started learning her way around the CalTech computer system, requisitioned a few things for the office and did as much as she could to prepare for Alex's arrival. She was surprised that things weren't very busy but figured that would change once Alex got back. Leonard continued to have meetings that he wouldn't talk about with Penny. Penny gleaned as much information as she could from Sheldon. Apparently the FBI put their investigation on hold when they found out that Joyce Kim was requesting asylum in the U.S. As part of that process they would be interviewing her and decided to postpone any further action until after those interviews took place. The following week promised to be more action-packed. Alex would be coming back to work. Sheldon and Missy's older brother would be arriving with Missy's car. And at some point Penny would be auditioning for Wil Wheaton's show. She hadn't mentioned that to anyone but Sheldon, partly because she thought she might need to leave early to deal with it and partly because she really didn't think it would go anywhere.

Penny was sitting at her desk Monday morning when Alex arrived carrying a box of office stuff. Alex was followed by another woman, also carrying a box.

"Hi. Penny, right?"

"That's me. Hi Alex. I guess Sheldon didn't tell you that he hired me to work for you guys. Is that okay?"

"Sure it's okay. I wasn't sure we were even going to have an assistant yet. And I guess I'm a little surprised it's you considering our history."

"We have a history?"

"Leonard."

"Oh, that. Leonard and I got engaged a couple of months ago. Anything that happened with you two is ancient history."

"Nothing happened, Penny. I promise. I made a mistake."

Standing behind Alex, her friend coughed.

"Oops. Sorry. Penny, this is my friend, Nora. Nora, this is Sheldon's and my assistant, Penny. You guys have something in common. Penny's an actress, too."

"Hi, Penny. Nice to meet you."

"Yeah. Nice to meet you too, Nora. Though I'm kind of not really doing the acting thing any more. Had my last bad experience and I'm walking away."

"Yeah, I know what that's like. I've got a few horror stories myself."

"I bet you don't have anything to match my last experience. I got fired off a movie where I was playing a go-go dancer that got turned into a gorilla."

"Believe it or not I auditioned for that movie. But I turned it down when they said I'd have to do most of it naked. I thought maybe it was a little _too_ gratuitous."

"The whole thing was gratuitous. But I only had to be naked under the ape hair so I was okay with it. And the director was a real ass. So you had a problem with the nudity?"

Alex and Nora looked at each other and laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"It's funny I guess. When I first met Nora she wasn't wearing anything."

"I don't understand."

"Okay. Sometimes to deal with pressure and stuff I go and take a life drawing class. I'm not a great artist but I can draw and it's nice to use my non-science muscles once in a while to clear my head. There's this Saturday class at Pasadena City College that's open to the public so I went in a few weeks ago and Nora was the nude model."

"Yeah, acting doesn't exactly pay the bills so I bartend and model for art classes on the side. The money isn't bad and you get to meet lots of interesting people."

"So the two of us got to talking after class and we hit it off. We've kind of been inseparable ever since. I couldn't have finished my dissertation without Nora making sure I ate and slept and kept going with it."

"Wait a second. Are you guys together?"

"Yup."

"Alex, I'm not judging or anything but I thought you were…"

"Straight. Yeah, me too. Guess it just took meeting the right girl."

"Wow. Just wow."

"Is this a problem for you, Penny?"

"No. Not at all. Not me. And I know Sheldon won't care. He probably won't even notice."

"So anyway, which office is mine?"

"You've got the one on the left. The stuff from your old office is in there. I didn't know how you wanted it organized so I didn't unpack it. When you're ready I'll be happy to give you a hand."

"I think we have it covered, Penny. Do I have any messages? And where's Sheldon? And his little nephew. I have to say I'm really curious to see him and this baby."

"Oh my God, he's like a different person with him. He's sweet and affectionate and very un-Sheldon-y. Right now he's across campus squaring away things at the Child Care Center with Missy. Oh, you probably don't know that Sheldon's sister just got a job managing the Humanities Building cafeteria."

"She's his twin, right?"

"Yeah, but they're completely different, almost opposites."

The phone began ringing.

"Good morning. Dr. Cooper and Dr. Jensen's office. This is Penny"

"Penny, it's Wil."

"Hi Wil, what's up?"

"Listen, I thought I'd be able to give you more notice but I need you here at the studio ASAP. The Syfy honchos are coming in and they want to see how I work with a co-host this afternoon."

"Wil, I haven't even auditioned for the job yet."

"Penny, I'm really stuck. Please?"

"Fine. I'll get there as soon as I can. You owe me."

"I have a feeling you'll like the payback, Penny."

"Bye, Wil."

Penny got up and went back to Alex's office where she and Nora were starting to unpack.

"Alex, something's come up. I need to leave for a couple of hours."

"Is something wrong, Penny?"

"No. Not really. I kinda told this guy I'd audition for this thing as a favor and he needs me to come over now."

"Who's the guy?"

"Wil Wheaton. From _Star Trek_."

Nora's eyes lit up.

"You know Wil Wheaton?"

"Yeah, kinda through Sheldon but he was also in the stupid gorilla movie."

"Y'know, I heard through the grapevine that he was looking for a co-host for his new Syfy show but that he had a really specific type in mind."

"Like I said, I'm doing him a favor. I don't expect this to go anywhere. But, can you do me a favor? It's okay to tell Sheldon why I'm away because he already knows about this. Please don't tell anyone else. Especially not Leonard. He wants me to stop even thinking about acting."

"No problem. We won't say a thing. We'll tell people you're off campus doing something for Sheldon if they ask."

"That'll work. Thanks, guys. I owe you."

"Good luck, Penny."

Penny grabbed her stuff and ran out the door.

"Alex, I have a feeling Penny has this gig even if she doesn't know it."

"That would be nice. Penny could use some good stuff in her life."

"I thought she said she just got engaged."

"Yeah. You haven't met who she's engaged to yet."

Coincidentally, few minutes later Leonard wandered into the office.

"Oh. Hi Alex. I dropped by to surprise Penny for lunch. Do you know where she is?"

"Sorry, Dr. Hof…Leonard. Penny had to go off-campus to take care of something for Sheldon. She should be back in a couple of hours."

"Oh, okay. Say, who's your friend?" Leonard asked as he cocked his eyebrows and smiled."

"Oh. Leonard, this is my friend Nora. She's helping me move my stuff in. Nora, this is Dr. Leonard Hofstadter. He's engaged to my assistant, Penny."

Still grinning, Leonard asked "So Nora, are you also a scientist?"

"No. I'm an actress. And a bartender. And a model. And whatever pays the bills."

"Wow. My fiancée used to be an actress but she gave it up to be with me and have a family."

"She must really love you to do that."

"I presented the case to her and it made sense. And I love her."

"So anyway, Leonard, I have a lot of unpacking to do. I'll tell Penny you came by."

"Thanks, Alex. I'll stop back later. Nice meeting you, Nora. I hope we get to see each other again."

Nora looked at Alex dumbfounded.

"_That's_ the kind of guy you were attracted to?"

"I have no excuse. Big, big mistake."

"You think? And what was with that thing he did with his eyebrows?"

"Oh, that. He thinks it's sexy. He figures when he does that women can't help but want to fuck him."

"And that actually works?"

"Apparently it worked with Penny. She's gonna marry him."

"And he still does that to other women?"

"I guess he figures he already got Penny. He wants to see whether he can do better on the side."

"What an ass!"

"Yeah. And I kinda feel sorry for Penny."

"Maybe she just needs a couple of friends to set her straight, so to speak."

"Yeah, Nora. I wouldn't be expecting Penny to decide to come play for our team."

"Too bad."

"Hey!"

"No need to worry, Alex. It's just such a waste. Penny seems like a really nice person and that Leonard is obviously an ass. She doesn't deserve that."

"Nobody does."

_A/N: To the reviewer who believes that Leonard has never done anything wrong, that he's only motivated by his deep love for Penny and that Sheldon probably belongs in jail. You're reading the wrong damn story._

_To those of you who've followed, favorited and reviewed, thank you. I hope you enjoyed the return of a couple of my favorites this chapter. You should all know that we're a bit more than halfway through. Those in the U.S., enjoy your holiday weekend. I'll likely be posting throughout. _


	26. Chapter 26

**26**

Amy Farrah Fowler was working diligently in her lab when she received a phone call. She recognized the number as that of her new landlord.

"Hello. This is Dr. Fowler."

"Dr. Fowler, I'm calling for Mr. Lewis. You signed a lease and gave him a check to cover your rent and security deposit a few days ago."

"That is correct. I plan to move my things in tomorrow."

"Our bank has informed us that your account has been frozen and the funds are unavailable. Unless we receive a bank check for the funds by the end of business today we will be forced to release the apartment to another potential tenant."

"I'm sure there must be some kind of error. I'll contact my bank immediately and make sure it's straightened out."

"As I said, you have till the end of the day. Goodbye."

Amy immediately dialed the bank.

"I'm sorry Dr. Fowler. This is beyond our control. The government has ordered that all of your accounts be frozen, both business and personal accounts. They are the only ones who can release your funds."

"This is a horrible inconvenience. I believe this is a mistake on your part and I will be seeking appropriate redress."

"Proceed as you wish, Dr. Fowler. Good day."

As Amy considered her next action, the director of the lab came into her office.

"Dr. Fowler, there are representatives from the FBI in my office. They wish to speak with you."

"Thank you. I assume they are here to apologize for the confusion they've caused by freezing my bank accounts."

"I believe it may be more serious than that, Dr. Fowler. I would go speak to them immediately if I were you."

"Oh, I intend to. Thank you for informing me."

Amy marched down to the director's office and, upon entering, glared at the two men in gray suits she found waiting.

"I assume you are here to clear up the confusion you've caused by interfering with my funds."

"Please be seated Dr. Fowler."

"I am very busy. Please say what you must so I can get on with my day. I have a great deal to do."

"Dr. Fowler, please be seated. Speaking with us is what your day will now be about. If you don't speak with us voluntarily we will be forced to take other action. Public action."

Amy sat down, but still felt extremely inconvenienced.

"Dr. Fowler, it has come to our attention that you are engaged to and receive funding from a foreign national. Is this accurate?"

"It's not illegal."

"Please answer the question."

"I receive my funding from a Saudi prince named Faisal. And yes, in order to guarantee that funding I agreed to become engaged to Faisal."

"And you receive all of your funding from this Faisal. Money to run your lab? To purchase equipment? Your salary?"

"Yes."

"And you have set up bank accounts for these funds?"

"I have."

"Are you the only one able to draw funds from these accounts?"

"Of course."

"Have you ever drawn funds from these accounts not connected to your research?"

"Periodically Faisal has requested that I send funds to others that he is funding. I am not aware of what those others are researching nor am I interested. It is likely not as important as my own work."

"Dr. Fowler, are you aware that your fiancée Faisal has been known to provide funding to organizations that promote and fund terrorism."

"That's about politics. I'm a scientist. I do not concern myself with something as mundane as politics."

"Dr. Fowler, I'm sure you understand that it is illegal to provide funds to terrorists."

"As I said, I am a scientist. These other matters do not concern me. I have spoken with you and apprised you of the situation. Now please release the funds to my bank accounts immediately."

"Dr. Fowler, we have tracked some of the checks you sent, as you now inform us, at your fiancée Faisal's request. They went to some organizations we believe are fronts for terrorism and anti-American activities."

"I was not aware of that. If you provide me a list of such organizations I will discuss the matter with Faisal. I'm certain he will be able to straighten it out. Now please release my funds."

"Dr. Fowler, the funds will not be released. All of Faisal's bank accounts in the United States are now frozen. I doubt this will be resolved anytime soon. We believe that Faisal has been using your research to launder funds and in turn provide funding to enemies of the United States. We will need to speak with you more extensively. Under the Patriot Act we could arrest you now. However, we are convinced you are just ignorant of the realities involved and suggest you engage an attorney to accompany you for our next session. Please do not take this matter lightly. You could very possibly find yourself in prison."

"This is all about politics. As I said they are not my concern. I am doing very important research and I am certain my superiors will be very upset if you interfere with it."

"Dr. Fowler, at the moment your lab and computers are being analyzed by our forensic specialists. We suggest you not leave Pasadena. We understand that you are temporarily residing with your mother. We encourage you to remain there until you hear from us again. We'll be back in touch in a few days. Thank you for your time."

"But what am I supposed to do for money? I was supposed to be moving into a new apartment tomorrow."

"We are aware that your landlord has contacted you about that. Unless you have another legal source of funding, we suggest you kiss that apartment goodbye until things are either straightened out or our investigation determines you are not involved."

"I must insist that my funds be returned to me."

"Dr. Fowler, you are welcome to seek redress. It will be expensive and take a long time and you will likely not be successful but you are welcome to try."

Amy left the director's office disappointed. When she reached her lab she found the director of the facility and two security guards awaiting her.

"Dr. Fowler, we removed your personal items from the lab and placed them in that cardboard box by the elevator. You will not have access to these premises until matters are resolved appropriately by the government. We will thank you to leave immediately. These security guards will escort you out."

"I don't understand. What will I do? What about my test subjects? My research?"

"The animals will be cared for in your absence. The animal you currently have at your mother's home is being removed from there and brought back here. I wish you good luck in resolving this matter. Goodbye."

Sullenly, Amy picked up her box of personal items and, escorted by the security guards, boarded the elevator and then left the building.


	27. Chapter 27

**27**

When Penny returned to work she wasn't sure her feet were even touching the ground. She walked into the office and went right to Sheldon and gave him a hug.

"Penny?"

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. I know that wasn't really appropriate for the office but I have some really amazing news."

"Would you like to share it?"

"They offered me the job. I'm going to be the co-host on Wil Wheaton's show when it comes back on SyFy."

"That's wonderful news, Penny. Congratulations."

"It's only a ten-week trial but the production schedule works so that I can still work for you too. They're still working on my contract but I'll probably sign next week."

"Penny, I realize that Wil Wheaton is a friend, but please allow me to review the contract before you sign it. I have a bit of experience with contracts as you know."

"Sure, sweetie. I trust that you have my best interests at heart. I need to call my agent."

"Penny, have you informed Leonard?"

"Um, not yet. I'm not really sure how he's going to take this. He thinks I've given up acting for good."

"Penny, if I understand what you are doing with Wil, I'm not certain it could actually be called acting. You will be yourself, Penny Queen, on the program, will you not?"

"You're right, Sheldon. I'm not really acting. I'm performing. As me. Maybe this is my big shot."

"I hope that is the case, Penny. Missy and I were considering having a small dinner celebration on Saturday. Perhaps we could celebrate your new situation then."

"Sheldon, who's going to be there?"

"Well, Missy and the baby, myself. You, hopefully. And Junior is expected to be here by then. And likely Alex and her friend Nora, who I quite like by the way. And I assume you will wish to bring Leonard. But, as I said, I wish to keep it small and we must be mindful of the baby."

"So, no Howard, Bernadette, Raj, Emily or Amy, huh."

"I have yet to see Howard or Raj since my return. Nor have they sought me out. And I have little desire to see Amy Farrah Fowler until she accepts the change in our relationship paradigm. According to Missy, Amy visited her once again and attempted to convince her to depart from our home and allow Amy to move in with me in exchange for temporary free rent in another apartment."

"Which hospital is Amy at?"

"Missy did not harm Amy but I suspect she may not survive another attempt to circumvent our will."

"Sheldon, do you mind if I hold off on announcing my thing with Wil until then. I think I'd like the support."

"I don't mind at all, Penny. I'm a bit concerned that you feel you won't get appropriate support from Leonard."

"Um, you know Leonard. He was so happy when I said I wouldn't be acting anymore."

"Penny, as you said yourself, this would not be acting."

"Okay. Sheldon, do you want to invite Wil?"

"I would, Penny, but I'm already aware through his incessant tweeting that Wil Wheaton will be out of town at a tabletop gaming convention this weekend. However, I did schedule a lunch with him for next week and I expect you to join us."

"And Leonard?"

"If necessary. You may feel otherwise after Saturday. Leonard may not be very happy about Wil hiring you."

"Well, technically Wil didn't hire me. I'll be working for the SyFy Channel. And if this works out they said they may have more stuff for me to do. Maybe even a couple of movies."

"Penny, you are aware that many of the movies the SyFy Channel produces are made in Eastern Europe and are on a par creatively with _Serial Apist_, are you not?"

"Yeah, I know. But it's still possible that I may actually have an acting career again someday. And it's thanks to you."

"Penny I had little or nothing to do with this."

"Sheldon, if not for you I wouldn't know Wil. I'm grateful for that. And I'm really, really happy."

"Penny, Missy called while you were out and said she had made some medical appointments for you later today. Should I be concerned?"

"No, not at all. Missy decided that with all the changes and stress in her life that seeing a therapist might be a good idea. She convinced me that it might make sense for me too so we're going out this afternoon to see if we can find the right ones."

"Though I believe psychotherapy is largely hokum, I cannot deny the value of having an impartial person to speak with about matters of concern. I believe that Missy made a good decision and I think it would possibly be helpful for you also. As things become more settled for me I may even consider it myself. If there is anything I can do to help, please don't hesitate to ask."

"Sheldon, you are a good boss and a good friend. Thank you."

"Thank you, Penny. Now please return to your desk. I wasn't sure whether you would have an opportunity to eat lunch while you were out so I picked something up for you. It's in the refrigerator. And Alex and I left some work on your desk that needs your attention as soon as possible."

"I'll get on it right away, boss. And thank you for getting me some lunch. I didn't even have a chance to think of eating."

"I expect Alex back shortly. The three of us should sit down together and review things before the end of the day. We should plan to do this regularly."

"I'll add it to the calendar."


	28. Chapter 28

**28**

Missy left the baby with Sheldon while she and Penny visited a few different therapists that afternoon and had some very interesting conversations. When they got back to Sheldon's apartment they reviewed their findings.

"So, what did you think, Penny?"

"I think that there were a couple of folks there that need therapy even more than I do."

"Yeah. The one with the puppets was particularly creepy."

"Don't remind me. But I really liked the married couple. I think I kinda clicked with her. I really didn't want to leave."

"I know. I felt the same way about him."

"So Melanie and Bob Anderson are gonna be our therapists. I guess I'm a little surprised we were able to find people so quickly."

"Well, maybe we just lucked out. So, do you want to think about the other thing?"

"The other thing?"

"The drinkin'."

"Yeah. I'm trying to cut back."

"Penny, you shouldn't be tryin' to do this by yourself. Have you said anythin' to Leonard?"

"Um, not really, no."

"And does he still pour you glass after glass of wine when you're home?"

"Well, yeah."

"Penny!"

"Listen, one step at a time. Let me set up an appointment with Melanie and I'll talk to her about it. Maybe she'll be able to help."

"Okay. But if you don't do somethin' soon I'm gonna start draggin' you to AA meetings."

"I'm not that bad, Missy."

"Penny, when was the last day that you didn't have a drink?"

"Um, uh, I don't remember. I guess it's been a while."

"Still think it's not that bad?"

"Okay, I guess maybe you have a point. I'll definitely talk to Melanie about it."

"So when are you going to set up an appointment?"

"Now, okay. I'll call now. Are you happy?"

"Well, I'm not unhappy."

"You're starting to sound like your brother."

Penny took out her cell and dialed.

"_Hello, this is Penny Queen. I was in earlier and I'd like to set up an appointment with Melanie Anderson. _

_You have an opening tomorrow? Great._

"_Yup. See you tomorrow at 3."_

"Fine, I'm all set for tomorrow. What about you, Missy?"

"I'm gonna need to coordinate with child care and Sheldon and work. I'll take care of it later. But I will take care of it. I promise."

"So Sheldon told me about the little dinner party you guys are having."

"It's not a big thing. Shelly just wants to bring the people together that he's going to be working with so me and Junior can meet them. We just want to make sure he doesn't make any wrong choices like last time."

"I dunno. So far he's cut more people out than he's included."

"Penny, you know what happened to him. And you know what that Amy's been tryin' to do since he got back. She wants everything back the way it was. I can't let that happen. He can't let that happen."

"I guess you're right. I just can't believe I didn't see any of it. Especially Amy."

"I think that once you start meetin' with Melanie you'll start figurin' some of that stuff out. You know that it is you that has to figure it out, right?"

"Yeah, I know. So what are you guys gonna be serving on Saturday. Which one of Sheldon's preferred restaurants will be catering?"

"None of 'em. Shelly and me are cookin' some good ol' Texas specialties. And y'all should be ready for spicy."

"You're kidding. Sheldon never cooks. He bakes sometimes or he might do breakfast but dinner has always been delivery."

"Penny, why do you think that is?"

"Well, probably because Leonard is lactose intolerant, can't eat corn, melon and most grains and hates spicy food."

"Yeah, well Sheldon likes all of those things and is a pretty good cook. And everyone in Texas knows their way around barbecue. To be honest, if you're gonna bring Leonard along, there probably won't be a lot he can eat."

"Oh, he can eat it. You just may not want to light a match anywhere near him for a few hours. And you'll want to keep the windows open and break out the scented candles."

"Penny…no, never mind."

"What?"

"No, I was gonna say something that's probably better unsaid."

"Missy, I thought we were friends."

"We are, but what I was gonna say wasn't particularly friendly."

"Spit it out."

"Are you seriously considering having kids who could inherit the same problems Leonard has?"

"I've thought about that. I just don't know. We just barely started talking about kids and we are definitely not on the same page."

"How's that?"

"Leonard seems to think I want a big family just like him."

"And?"

"I was thinking one or two. And lots of animals. Dogs. Cats. Maybe even horses someday."

"And Leonard just wants lots of kids."

"He's allergic to most animals. And he's scared of horses. And spiders."

"And you get to take care of all those kids."

"I guess."

"Penny, why does Leonard get to fulfill all his fantasies and you don't get to realize any of yours?"

"I don't know."


	29. Chapter 29

**29**

"Hi Honey. I'm home."

"Hi, sweetie."

"So I had a frustrating day."

"Yeah? What happened?"

"More meetings I can't talk to you about. I just don't understand why these people are so curious about something that happened so long ago. And it didn't even really happen."

"Still the Joyce Kim thing, huh?"

"Can't talk about it. Would you like some wine?

"Think I'll pass. I think I'd like to cut back a little."

"Penny, you don't drink that much. And I really don't want to drink alone."

"Fine, just a little bit."

Leonard poured a full glass.

"That's not a little bit, Leonard."

"So don't finish it."

"Fine. So Sheldon and Missy are having a little dinner get-together on Saturday. They invited me, us"

"Do we have to? Things aren't so great with me and Sheldon right now."

"Leonard, you don't have to do anything. I'm going."

"Don't you already spend enough time with him?"

"That's work. This is social. It's different."

"Pretty sure Sheldon doesn't know the difference."

"Well if he doesn't, Missy does. She doesn't have a lot of friends here and I want to be supportive."

"Why bother? She isn't going to be here that long."

"I think you're wrong, Leonard. She has a pretty good job, better than she had in Texas, and she has a nice place to live."

"Well, her brother is going to drive her nuts. He's just behaving himself around her now for his own reasons. Sooner or later he's going to make it impossible for her. Amy's the only one who'd ever been able to keep him in line."

"I think maybe Sheldon's thing with Amy might have been a mistake, Leonard."

"We'll see."

"Oh yeah, you should know that Sheldon's big brother is going to be in town for a few days. He's driving Missy's car up."

"So?"

"According to Missy, Junior thinks you had something to do with the Arctic thing blowing up in Sheldon's face. He's not happy about it. And Missy says he has kind of a temper."

"So we played a prank on Sheldon. It wasn't a big thing. He got over it."

"Leonard, he forgave you. I don't think he'll ever get over it."

"That's only because he's crazy. Want some more wine?"

"Yeah, fine."

_Later that night_

"Hello, Leonard."

"Hi Amy. I thought you might lie to know that Sheldon is having a little get-together on Saturday night."

"I suspect that Missy has made sure to leave me off the invitation list. Will you and Penny be attending?"

"I'd rather not but Penny wants to go."

"Perhaps I will happen by. My desire to move in with Sheldon has recently become more of a necessity."

"How so?"

"I can't really go into that now. Perhaps I will see you on Saturday."

"Goodbye Amy."


	30. Chapter 30

**30**

Penny's first session with Melanie Anderson the next and they touched on a lot of things; life for Penny back home in Nebraska, Kurt, other men, the guys, though they seemed to talk more about Sheldon than Leonard. They talked about Penny's recent rededication to her craft and how it fell away after the _Serial Apeist_ failure. They talked about Penny's feelings for Leonard and what he said their life would be like. Penny had no idea how she felt about herself. She could only repeat what her friends had said about her, much of which wasn't very nice.

Melanie concluded fairly quickly that Penny was clinically depressed but functional, prescribed weekly visits and suggested that Penny start taking anti-depressants.

"Melanie, I've never been a big fan of drugs."

"Penny, if you had a headache you'd take an aspirin, right?"

"Yeah."

"It's the same deal. You're depressed. Depression is a disease. There are drugs to help you with that, to help put you in a better position to deal with things. It may not be forever, but for now you need something to help you out of the pit you're in. Now, it's probably going to take a little while until you really feel a difference. If you really want to give the medication a chance, you should probably stop drinking alcohol."

"Completely?"

"For now, yes. Will that be a problem?"

"I don't think so, but maybe."

"Penny, how much do you drink?"

"I don't know, a couple, three glasses of wine a day."

"And you never thought that was part of your problem?"

"Not until lately. It's not like I'm an alcoholic."

"Labeling things is tough. But I think maybe you could have a drinking problem. Does your fiancée, Leonard right, does Leonard drink with you?"

"Pretty much. The first thing he does when he gets home is pour us some wine. He always has."

"Maybe that needs to stop."

"Might not be so easy."

"Penny, you are about to start taking medication that I absolutely believe you need to be taking. For that medication to work best you have to stop drinking."

"Okay?"

"If Leonard is unwilling to go along with that then maybe you need to consider that he might not have your best interests at heart."

"But Leonard loves me. He has for a very long time."

"If he really loves you he'll stop enabling your drinking. You should talk to him about that. And maybe you should consider a program like AA."

"I'm not an alcoholic," Penny responded sternly.

"Try not drinking for a few days. If everything is fine we don't need to talk about it again. Okay."

"Okay."

When he got home that night Leonard immediately pulled out a bottle of wine.

"I'm not having any, Leonard. I'm taking some medication and I can't drink while I'm taking it."

"What's wrong?" Leonard accompanied the question with a cocked eyebrow and a caring smile.

Penny wasn't really in the mood for a fight or much of anything else.

"I, um, have a little infection."

"So we can't…"

"Not for a few days, no."

Penny felt a little uncomfortable lying to Leonard, but she just wasn't ready to have the discussion she knew they needed to have.


	31. Chapter 31

**31**

Penny knocked on the door to 4A on Saturday morning. Missy came to the door.

"Mornin' sweetie."

"Hi Missy. I was wondering if there was anything that I could do to help with tonight?"

"Aw, that's so sweet. Well, Junior showed up late last night and he's still sleepin' on the couch. Soon as he wakes up we're headin' to the market to get what we need. Shelly already headed out to the Farmer's Market. I think we have everything covered."

"Darn."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm kinda trying to avoid Leonard."

"Oh. Mind tellin' me why?"

"When I told him I didn't want any wine last night I kinda didn't tell him the real reason."

"The anti-depressants?"

"Yeah. I told him I had an infection and that I couldn't drink and we couldn't…"

"Fuck."

"Yeah."

"Penny, I don't wanna sound like a broken record, but if you're lying to and avoiding sex with the guy you supposedly wanna marry, then maybe you oughta be thinkin' twice about that commitment."

"Yeah. I know. Me and Melanie started talking about that."

"So, if you really wanna avoid Leonard, how about you babysit for me while us Coopers go to the market and get what we need for tonight. We already got the meat and Sheldon has it marinatin'. But we need other stuff. And we're gonna stay away from alcohol except Junior won't make it without his beer."

"I appreciate that. Is there anything I can tell Leonard to pick up for tonight? Especially since I won't let him bring wine."

"Alex and Nora said they're bringing some dessert. I figure you can never have too much dessert."

"Okay, I'll get Leonard to pick something up that he can eat."

"Sounds good. I figure Junior's gonna be up pretty soon. I'll give a yell when you should come over."

"Listen, I'm just gonna tell Leonard about dessert and I'll be right back. Is that okay?"

"I haven't got a problem with it but remember, I did warn you about Junior."

"I'm pretty sure I can handle Junior."

"Well, you do seem to have a way with the Coopers."

"Back in a minute."

Penny went back to her apartment. She could hear Leonard in the bathroom. She never went into the bathroom while he was in there. There were some things she just didn't want to see.

"Leonard," she called through the bathroom door, "Missy needs me to babysit for a while. When you have a chance can you go out and pick up some kind of dessert for tonight. We shouldn't go over there empty handed."

"I thought we'd bring a bottle of wine," Leonard called back out.

"Sheldon doesn't drink. Missy isn't drinking as long as she's breastfeeding. Alex stopped drinking when she got together with Nora because she's in recovery. I can't drink. You'd be the only one drinking."

"So."

"So it's rude Leonard. Just get some dessert."

"I'd rather just not go."

"That's your choice. But I'm going."

"Fine. I'll pick something up. When will you be back?"

"Not sure. I'll let you know when I know."

"I thought when I moved in here we'd be spending more time together, not that you'd be spending all your time with Sheldon and his fucking family," Leonard grumbled.

"What was that Leonard? I couldn't hear through your selfish grumbling."

"Never mind. I'll see you later."

Penny went back over to 4A.

"How'd he take it," Missy asked.

"He complained. He's always complaining. Usually I can shut him up with sex but since…"

"Since you lied to him about your meds you can't."

"I could but I don't feel like putting myself in that particular position right now. So where's Junior?"

"In the bathroom. He should be out in a minute. Here, take the baby for a minute."

"Okay."

A short time later Junior came out of the bathroom. Penny's mouth opened in shock. Junior looked just like Sheldon, except bigger and with lots of muscles and a crewcut. Penny thought "Wow. Before Leonard, Junior was exactly the kind of guy I'd pick up, take home and fuck his brains out."

"So, who's this pretty young thing holdin' my nephew?"

"Put it back in your pants, Junior. This is our neighbor, Penny."

"This is the Penny that Shelly's been goin' on about all this time? Honey, my little brother did not do you justice. You are prettier'n a Texas sunset."

"Um, thanks. Nice to meet you too."

"So, um, after this little shindig tonight how about you 'n' me goin' out dancin'? Or somethin'?

"Ummmm."

"Junior, Penny's engaged to Sheldon's old roommate, Leonard. That means hands off."

"You're engaged to the little creep that's caused my brother so much trouble? Why fer gosh sake would you go and do that?"

"Junior, you're bein' impolite. Now come on. We're pickin' Shelly up at the Farmer's Market and then we're getting' the rest of the stuff we need for tonight."

Penny was relieved she didn't have to explain her engagement to Leonard again. She was beginning to have difficulty remembering why she did it herself.


	32. Chapter 32

**32**

Missy got into her car for the first time in it seemed like forever and Junior got into the passenger seat.

"So what's goin' on with that Penny. Somethin' seems off with that girl."

"Poor thing's got a lot of stuff going on and she's only just starting to get a handle on it."

"Is our brother part of the problem?"

"Not really. I think he's more like the answer."

"Yer kiddin'."

"I'm not. Somethin' changed with Shelly. You saw it at home when he was helpin' me with the baby. For some reason all that crap falling down on him did something. Oh, he's still crazy with all the science but he's making room for others in his life, and not just because they can do things for him."

"So what's his deal with Penny?"

"I'm pretty sure he's in love with her. Momma and Meemaw agree. I don't think Shelly's figured it out yet. But he wants to get her away from Leonard. He thinks Leonard is really bad for her."

"Well, considerin' what Leonard did to Shelly, I ought to just throw him in the trunk, drive him out into the middle of the dessert and leave him there."

"Much as I like the sound of that, right now Penny would probably drive out to rescue him and then go Junior Rodeo on your ass."

"Junior Rodeo?"

"She used to rope and castrate cows. Won a couple of ribbons accordin' to Shelly."

"Sounds like the perfect woman. Just not for that whiny little backstabbin' weasel."

"I know. But Shelly thinks it's real important that Penny reaches her own conclusions and makes her own decisions. And I agree with him. If Penny doesn't figure out Leonard and her situation on her own she'll never be ready for the next step."

"Yer plottin' something. Yer plottin' something that Shelly don't even know about."

"Yeah. But if you say a word to anyone, we'll be goin' round 'n' round. And you won't like it one bit. And you will never see your nephew again."

"Fine. Play Cupid. I just can't believe that my little brother would ever want to be with any woman, let alone a spitfire like Penny."

"Junior, he's already in love with her. Has been since almost the moment they met. Leonard's just been cock blockin' him and every other guy that ever came close. Went and made himself look like the only viable candidate. And as long as Shelly thought Leonard was his best friend he wasn't gonna do a damn thing. He even started seein' that awful woman Amy. Y'all saw what she did to him."

"I still can't believe that Shelly dated someone for years."

"I ain't sure you could really call what they did datin'. I think he was her science project and she was messin' around with his brain. And I'm not sure she's done. She's been tryin' to get me to leave since I got here so she can move in with him. Hell, when we first got back she'd already moved all her crap into the apartment."

"If I know Shelly, he did not take kindly to that."

"No he did not. And since then she tried to make friends with me to convince me to leave and the other day she offered to pay my rent on another apartment so I'd move out."

"That little girl doesn't know the Coopers."

"I know. She thinks that Shelly's the only one with a stubborn streak a mile wide. She don't realize that every one of us is like that."

"Missy, I see Shelly wavin' us over to pick him up."

"Do not say a thing about what we've been talkin' about to him. Okay? He's in a good place right now and he's doin' a good thing for his friend Penny. He don't need you confusin' things."

"Fine. But I was really lookin' forward to havin' some fun with that Leonard."

"You can still have some fun. Just don't do anything that makes Penny want to defend him, okay?

"I'll try," Junior replied with a sly wink.


	33. Chapter 33

**33**

The Coopers returned to North Los Robles a couple of hours later with their supplies.

"How many people did you invite to this thing tonight, Sheldon? It looks like you shopped for enough to feed a small army."

"We only invited a handful of people, Penny. Yourself and Leonard. Alex and Nora. At your suggestion I did reach out to Raj and Howard but they said they both had plans with their significant others. I even suggested they just come by for coffee and dessert but they still demurred. Perhaps another occasion will be more appropriate for them?"

"I guess."

"Did the baby behave while we were out, sweetie?"

"Pretty much. He did get a little cranky when Leonard came by though."

"Are you sure it was the baby that was cranky, Penny?"

"Shelly!"

"It's a fair question, Missy. Leonard _has_ been pretty cranky lately. But this time it was the baby. He was acting the same way he did when Amy came by the office."

"So my son's just a good judge of character. He's already actin' like a Cooper through 'n' through."

"Missy, behave. Leonard is my former roommate, Penny's fiancée and will be our guest later on. I expect everyone will behave appropriately in front of company."

"Shelly, you know I'll behave. Penny's our good friend and I will be polite to her fiancée. I promise."

"And I'll behave too. Even though I'd prefer to throw him out the window," added Junior.

Penny looked a bit mystified.

"Sheldon, I don't understand why Missy and Junior have such a mad on for Leonard. Is there something I don't know?"

"It's nothing you need to be concerned about, Penny. Now that we are home there is much preparation for tonight's festivities to be done. You probably want to go home and prepare yourself. We'll see you at 6:30. Alright?"

"Sheldon, are you trying to kick me out?"

"Not at all. It's just that there is work to be done and you are expected as a guest, not a hostess. We have everything well in hand and I assume that you would like a bit of Penny time, since I noticed that Leonard's car was not in the lot downstairs."

"Y'know what, some Penny time would be nice. It seems like forever since I had some. See ya later."

Once he escorted Penny out, Sheldon Turned and faced his siblings.

"Missy, you know as well as I what kind of state Penny is in. I'd appreciate it if you, and you, Junior, would not put her in a position where she has no choice but to defend Leonard. We must allow Leonard to continue to act as he has and do our work for us. Penny will soon wake up to the mistake she is making."

"Okay, Shelly. But I don't know how long I can hold back. That little creep has been crappin' on you for a long time and I don't like it one bit. If anyone's gonna make you miserable, it's gonna be me, like always."

"Please show some patience, Junior. We must allow Leonard to do the damage to their relationship himself. Trust me, he will. Outside pressures will force him to do so without any help from us."


	34. Chapter 34

**34**

Alex and Nora walked in the lobby door of 2311 North Los Robles at 6:25.

"Sheldon's kind of a stickler for promptness."

"Well that's probably gonna end up being a be a problem for you, babe."

"Hey, I'm on time where work's concerned. I'm only late for stuff we're doing."

"So why's that?"

"I just want to make sure I look perfect. For you it's not that hard. For me it takes a little time."

"Sweetie, you'd look perfect to me no matter what."

"Thank you."

"I see the elevator's broken."

"I think it's been broken for years. Penny told me there's a story."

They continued talking as they walked up the stairs.

"So what's the deal here?"

"Okay. Let's see if I have this right. Sheldon and Leonard used to be roommates. Penny moved in across the hall and Leonard fell head over heels in love with her and now they live together in Penny's apartment and Sheldon lives with his sister Missy."

"And that's who's gonna be here?"

"Plus Sheldon and Missy's older brother George who's just in town for a few days and the baby."

"And Missy and George are the only ones I haven't met yet?"

"Right."

"So is this a work thing or a social thing?"

"Sheldon said social, but work'll probably come up."

"We're not gonna be talking physics all night, are we?"

"It'll probably come up but it's more likely we'll talk about comics. That's right in your wheelhouse, babe. You may be the only girl these guys have ever met who's into comics."

"And this guy Leonard, who's engaged to Penny, put the moves on you while he was dating her?"

"It might have been mutual move putting. What can I say? For some reason I thought he was a nice guy."

"The same guy who tried to put the move on both of us the other day."

"Yeah. Let's try not to bring that up. I really like Penny."

"If you really like her you should bring it up."

"Not in front of a bunch of people."

"Okay. Well, here we are, 4A."

"Alex knocked on the door."

Missy opened the door.

"Hey, y'all must be Alex and Nora. I'm Missy, Sheldon's sister."

"Are we the first ones to get here? We brought some chocolate mousse, fruit and melons."

Missy took the bag from Nora.

"Nope. Everyone's here. We all know about Sheldon's thing for promptness. So you guys know Leonard and Penny."

Penny came over and gave Alex and Nora each a hug. Leonard nervously hung back.

"It's really nice to see you guys outside work. You both look great."

"Thank you."

"While Missy brings your dessert over to the kitchen let me introduce you to Junior, Sheldon's older brother. Junior, come over and meet Alex and Nora."

"Does my little brother only know beautiful women?"

Alex, Nora and Penny all blushed a little.

"So, I see Leonard over there. Why aren't you two beauties with _your_ boyfriends?"

Sheldon heard the exchange and came over.

"Junior, Alex and Nora are a couple. They're together."

"Well, this _is_ California. I should have guessed I'd meet my first lesbians sooner or later."

Missy joined the conversation.

"First, Junior, that's rude. And second, Alex and Nora are not the first women you met who are together."

"Pretty darn sure they are."

"What about the Fester twins?"

"Those sweet old ladies that run the lumber yard?"

"Yeah, the ones that always wear the same kinds of clothes and have the same haircut."

"Yeah."

"Junior, they ain't twins and they ain't sisters neither."

"You're shittin' me."

"Nope. Momma told me years ago. She don't really approve but they give folks at the church a pretty good discount so momma looks the other way."

"Wow. I sure didn't know. I'm really sorry if I insulted you guys."

"As long as you're not trying to beat us up or keep us from doing anything, no problem."

"So what do you guys call yourselves?"

"I'm Nora and she's Alex."

"No I mean I'm not sure what the right word for a lesbian couple is."

"It's couple. And can we drop the lesbian thing. It's a label. I'm not really fond of labels," Nora answered.

"Okay, so while I try to get my foot outta my mouth, would you guys like a beer. For some reason it's the only alcohol my brother's allowin' at this shindig."

"Sorry, Junior, we don't drink. Water or juice would be nice though."

"I'll be back in a few."

"So, Penny, Junior looks a little embarrassed."

"Yeah, it's his first trip to California so you should probably cut him a little slack. He's used to parties where the liquor flows freely and all the women are available."

"I am sure that Junior has no problem with the ladies."

"Nora!" exclaimed an embarrassed Alex.

"Hey, I can admire the merchandise. It's not like I'm shopping."

Penny and Missy both looked confused.

"I thought you were…"

"Please understand that I'm not being critical or contentious but like I said before, I don't like labels. Alex and I are together. We both have, let's say, varied histories."

"I'm confused. Penny are _you_ confused?" said Missy.

"A little."

"Nora, this is your thing. You keep telling me you don't like coming into a room and announcing your back story yet, here we are again…"

"Sweetie, I'm sorry. Really. If you want I'll drop it."

"You already started. Go ahead."

"Okay, so here's the deal. Finding love is hard enough. I've just never felt it was really that important to check the plumbing when you find it."

"So?" asked Penny.

"I've been with guys and I've been with girls. But I think I really struck gold with this one. And I get to be her first girl."

"And hopefully my only girl." And Alex gave Nora a kiss.

"You guys are really in love."

"Hopefully forever and ever."

"Just like us, Penny." Leonard interrupted.

"Yeah." Penny responded with a bit of a sour look.

Just then Sheldon announced that dinner was ready to be served.

"Everythin' is over on the counter. Just serve yourselves and then plop down at the dining room table. There's room for everyone."

"Hey, Missy. Where's the baby?"

"I kinda kept him up most of the afternoon so maybe he naps though dinner. I gotta feed him soon so he'll be out to visit in a bit."

Once everyone sat down Penny stood up.

"Now that we're all here, I have a big announcement."

Leonard looked dumbfounded. Penny hadn't said anything to him. "What could it possibly be?" he thought. "I wonder if…, but nah, Penny would have told me first."

And then there was a knock on the door.

Sheldon stood up. "I wonder who that could possibly be. Tonight's guests are all here."

Sheldon opened the door to find himself face-to-face with Amy Farrah Fowler.

_Next: Fireworks, waterworks and a couple of exits._

_I'm headed out to a Memorial Day BBQ, but I promise the next chapter will go up later today. Is that cruel of me? Maybe._


	35. Chapter 35

**35**

"Amy, why are you here?"

"Leonard informed me of this get-together and I assumed that you were just unable to reach me."

"I had no intention of inviting you."

"I'm your girlfriend, Sheldon. Of course I belong at any social gathering you organize."

"I have informed you on multiple occasions that we are no longer boyfriend and girlfriend."

"According to our Relationship Agreement, that you wrote, the relationship is not officially terminated until the Relationship Dissolution Agreement is executed."

"And I sent it to you last week by registered mail. You received it. I have proof."

"As I have yet to sign it I am still your girlfriend."

"I hereby execute the "I don't want to" clause. The relationship is hereby dissolved. Please depart."

Junior came to the door.

"Shelly, let the little lady have some dinner. If she dated you for so long she must have a few stories and I wanna hear 'em."

And Missy came over.

"No Junior. I do not want this woman in my home. I don't like her and I don't trust her."

"Momma says you never turn a guest away. Y'all come on in and sit right down next to me, little lady."

Junior led Amy to the dinner table.

"Missy, this is Junior trying to embarrass me."

"Shelly, there ain't much we can do about it now, but I'll deal with him later myself. And when Momma and Meemaw hear about it…"

"Alright. As long as Junior is somehow dealt with. Perhaps we can influence Amy to depart as quickly as possible."

Missy led Sheldon back to the table and glared at Amy Farrah Fowler.

"Okay, lady. You're here for now. But you say or do anything I don't like and you will not enjoy what happens."

"Sheldon, are you going to permit your sister to threaten your girlfriend?" Amy asked.

Through gritted teeth, Sheldon answered "You are not my girlfriend."

Leonard turned to Penny, smiled, cocked his eyebrow and said "So, what's this big announcement?"

"Not sure this is the right time, Leonard."

"Penny," Amy offered, "if you have some sort of announcement I'm sure we would all like to hear it. Have you and Leonard set your wedding date? Are you with child? Will I be your Maid of Honor? Have you purchased new sexy underthings?"

Penny glared at Amy and then at Leonard.

"Fine. I'll tell you. Next month, in addition to working for Sheldon and Alex, I'll also start working with Wil Wheaton as the co-host of his new show on the SyFy Channel."

Missy flew across the table to give Penny a hug and was quickly joined by Alex, Nora and Sheldon. Leonard just sat and glared, as did Amy Farrah Fowler.

Amy looked at Junior and said, "I will take this opportunity to get a plate of food" and left the table.

Alex, Nora, Missy, Sheldon and Junior peppered Penny with questions. Leonard continued to sit and glare at Penny.

"So what does a co-host do?

"Well, I'll be on every show and introduce special segments and participate in the discussions. I'll also do special reports from other places so there will be some travel but mostly on weekends. I worked with George Takei at the audition and the SyFy people said I looked really natural and, thanks to the guys, I knew what I was talking about. I guess a lot of stuff I heard the guys talking about over the years seeped in and I remember it."

"How long will the show be on?"

"Well, they just finished their first 10-week series. That was when they decided Wil needed a co-host and I was the only one Wil brought in to audition and they hired me on the spot. They figure they'll do two or three series a year. That's why I'll keep working with Sheldon."

"I'm certain we'll be able to work out an acceptable schedule. This is a wonderful opportunity for Penny and I would not wish to stand in her way." Sheldon stared right at Leonard as he finished his sentence.

"Hey Sheldon," Penny asked as she looked around the room, "where did Amy go?"

"She went over to get some food." Junior answered.

Everyone looked around. Amy was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly they heard the baby screaming loudly from Missy's bedroom. Missy jumped up quickly followed by Penny. They both ran to Missy's room where they found Amy Farrah Fowler trying to leave the room.

"What the hell are you doing in my baby's room, bitch?"

"I heard the infant bawl and I came in to calm it."

"Bullshit!"

"What's in your hand, Amy?" Penny asked.

"Nothing."

"Give me what's in your hand."

"I don't have anything."

Penny grabbed and pried open Amy's hand.

"Missy, she has the baby's rattle. And it's wet. I know exactly what she was doing."

Penny glared at Amy, grabbed her ear between her thumb and forefinger and dragged her screaming out to the living room. Once out there Amy broke away.

"Do you know what she was doing, Sheldon? She took the baby's rattle and she licked it, that's what she did."

"Penny, I don't understand," Sheldon responded.

"Sheldon please don't hate me for not telling you this before, but when Amy wants someone to like her she rubs herself against and licks all their stuff. She just tried to do it with the baby."

"Is this true, Amy?"

"I was merely trying to acclimate the infant to my scent so it would cease crying in my presence. After all, we will be family at some point."

Missy was holding her still-crying child and muttering "I'm gonna fuckin' kill her."

"And you have done this previously?"

"Indeed. I did it in your old office, Penny's apartment, here, at Howard and Bernadette's apartment, Howard's mother's house and Rajesh's apartment. As you can see no harm has been done."

Sheldon was beginning to turn red.

"And you did this despite my feelings about germs which are well known to you?"

"You have a germ phobia, Sheldon, not a disease. Now that you are aware of my activities do you not feel more comfortable with the prospect of sharing bodily fluids?"

"You did this in order to prepare me for coitus!"

"Partially. Partially I wished to make sure that you were aware, on a subconscious level, that you are mine."

"Well, that is not the result you have achieved. I feel violated. And you have similarly violated my friends and relations. As I have previously informed you, our Relationship Agreement is null and void. I will not permit you to use it against me again. You are banished and will now depart this apartment and this building and never come back. I will inform security personnel at CalTech that you are to be denied entry. If necessary I will seek the assistance of the police in this matter. You are no better than a stalker. I wish to never see you again, Amy Farrah Fowler, and I now regret ever meeting you at all. You are a stubborn, selfish child. Those who avoided and derided you as you were growing up were no doubt correct in their estimation of you. Now depart. Now."

"But Sheldon," Amy said as she looked around.

Junior stood up from the table. "Sheldon, Missy, everyone. I sincerely apologize for convincin' y'all to let her stay. I was wrong." And then he looked at Amy. "Y'all better be out the door by the time I count to three. If you ain't, I'll forget my Christian upbringin' and that you are a lady and kick you down all six flights of fuckin' stairs, through the lobby 'n' out onto the street.

"One."

Amy looked around and locked eyes with Leonard, who had a very guilty look on his face and then began staring at the floor.

"Two."

Nobody made a move to stop Junior as he advanced toward Amy.

"Three."

Amy turned, ran out the door and down the stairs.

The baby stopped crying.

And then everyone looked at Leonard.

"What?"

"You made this happen, didn't you Leonard?" Sheldon said accusingly.

"All I did was inform Amy of the event. The rest was all her."

"What was the purpose of informing her at all?"

"Whatever is going on between you and Amy is just some kind of big misunderstanding. I thought if you guys got together socially you could iron things out. You and Amy belong together just like me and Penny."

"Would you call what just occurred ironing things out?"

"I didn't know Amy would do that. She made a mistake. You made lots of mistakes with her. It'll all work out in time, Sheldon."

"So Amy willfully spreading her germs on every surface and item I come in contact with qualifies as a little mistake. Well, I guess that makes sense coming from someone who destroys another's well-earned reputation and calls it a prank."

Penny, who was standing with Missy and the baby watching as the scene developed could no longer stand by.

"Is that what you did in the Arctic, Leonard? Did you destroy Sheldon's reputation?"

"Sheldon's exaggerating as usual, Penny. It was a prank just like I said. He forgave me. It's ancient history. He's the one who made it worse by sending everyone an email saying he'd proven String Theory. I had nothing to do with that."

Missy turned to Penny. "Screwin' around with Shelly's results was Leonard's idea. After Shelly came back, everything he'd ever written and everything he wrote after that was gone over with a fine-tooth comb because they didn't trust him or his work anymore. Everything. It only stopped a little while ago."

"Sheldon?"

"Penny, I forgave them because I thought that I may have placed undue pressure on my friends to help me succeed in my research. I did not wish to lose them as friends. And yes, all of my work was examined and re-examined before it was ever permitted to be submitted for publication. It is still possible that repercussions from the incident will prevent me from ever receiving a Nobel Prize."

"And the only thing on Leonard's mind when he came back was getting me in the sack."

"Penny, you're making a big thing out of nothing. And why didn't you tell me anything about the Wil Wheaton thing? You gave up acting. We're going to be married. We're supposed to be sharing everything."

"Oh, we're supposed to be sharing everything, Leonard? Okay, fine. Let's share. I don't have an infection. I'm seeing a therapist and started taking anti-depressants and that's why I stopped drinking."

"Penny, I think maybe we need to have a talk. Let's go home and work this out."

"You know what, Leonard? No. I'm going to stay here with my friends. You're welcome to leave but I suggest you look around for somewhere else to stay for a while. I don't want to see your face when I get home."

"Penny, you're overreacting."

"I'm not so sure that I am. I'm embarrassed. I'm upset. I'm ashamed of myself. But no, I don't think I'm overreacting. So, please leave and I think maybe I'll have Junior check the apartment before I go home. If you're still there I think I'd kinda like to see him do that stair thing."

Leonard looked around for support, much as Amy had. Finding none he slowly exited, pouting.

Alex and Nora rushed over to Penny as she started to break down sobbing.


	36. Chapter 36

**36**

Penny continued sobbing.

"Missy, I'm not certain what to do now."

"Shelly, take Penny back to your bedroom and put her to bed. Sit with her. Don't come back out until she's asleep."

Sheldon draped his arm across Penny's shoulder and slowly guided her back to his bedroom.

Missy took command while still holding her baby.

"Junior, go across the hall and make sure Leonard leaves. You know what to do if he doesn't. I don't see no reason to be gentle."

"Nora and Alex, I apologize. This is a mess you're smack in the middle of and I'm not sure which way it's gonna go."

"Missy, if you don't mind, I think we'd like to stay and do what we can to help, at least to clean up. Penny needs people around her that are there for _her_, not for her _and_ Leonard. Fuck Leonard." Alex replied.

"I'm with Alex. Even though I just met most of you I'm pretty good with first impressions. I immediately liked Penny when I met her and I thought Leonard was a douche when I met him. So far I see no reason to change my mind." Nora added.

Back in his bedroom Sheldon sat Penny down on his bed and removed her shoes. Then he helped her lie down on the bed and put a light blanket over her. Penny just looked at him and smiled a little through her tears.

"But Sheldon," Penny protested through her sobbing, "nobody's allowed in your bedroom."

Sheldon began to sing.

_Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur._

_Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr._

Sheldon kept singing until Penny was asleep. He tiptoed out of the room to the waiting group.

"Penny's asleep."

"Shelly, Junior made sure Leonard left."

"What now?"

Nora thought for a second and then spoke up.

"I think Penny needs some space. Maybe Penny would be better off if most folks, especially Leonard, couldn't find her for a couple of days while she figures stuff out. She's welcome to stay with me and Alex. We have a spare room and we can either be there or not be there, whatever she wants."

"Thank you, Nora. Of course it's Penny's decision but that sounds like a reasonable proposal. I suspect that Leonard will attempt to reconcile immediately and begin harassing Penny with phone calls and messages and likely emissaries."

"Sheldon, I know I'm pretty new to this bunch, but why are you so dead set against Penny being with Leonard. I know he's obviously a jerk but they _are_ engaged to be married after all. Sometimes people marry jerks."

"Penny is my friend, Nora. She has been a better friend to me than Leonard ever was. She took care of me when I was sick. She patiently explained social situations to me when nobody else would. Even when she and I fought we enjoyed it. She is a worthy opponent and a worthy friend. Even when I ignored her in favor of Amy Farrah Fowler she still stood by me when necessary. And in turn I allowed Leonard to cajole her into his bed again and again. I encouraged her to stay with him despite my feeling that he only wanted her as a decoration, an accessory. I ignored what was happening to her as she drank more and more alcohol and eschewed the many friends she had before she pair bonded with Leonard because he felt uncomfortable around them. And when she was at her lowest, with no job and no prospects, Leonard of course swooped in and convinced her to commit her life to him. And what did I do? I ran away. And she told me it was the right thing for me to do despite the fact that it essentially left her alone to fend for herself with no real support. She was correct, of course. I did have to leave. And now that Leonard has been exposed as the shallow, venal individual he is, how can I do anything but stand by her side? I must help her. Her life is finally beginning to become what it should be. I gave her a position not just because I believe she can perform the duties adequately. I gave it to her because she needed to gain confidence in herself again. So she could be Penny again. Penny may not have the academic credentials we have and may not yet be an accomplished professional, but as a person she is probably the best of us. And she makes us all better as people. I would be lost without her in my life."

"Shelly, admit it. You love her."

"Missy, whether I do or not, now is not the time. Penny needs to be Penny, not part of another coupling. She needs to make choices that benefit her and her alone. She needs to choose her own future. And if I am not part of that future I will accept that and move on. But I will not confuse her at a time when she can ill afford it. I will be her friend. And I will do that with no expectations. I will not, as those who previously claimed to love her or be her best friend, manipulate her to my will. Penny is not a doll. She is not an accessory. She is light and joy and chaos. She is Penny."

Penny had woken up and was coming out for a glass of water when she heard Sheldon speaking. She hung back in the hallway where nobody could see her and listened. When he was done she tiptoed back to his bedroom, got back on his bed and fell back asleep with a smile on her face and a little tear in her eye.

Penny woke up again a couple of hours later and found Missy, Sheldon, Alex and Nora waiting for her in the living room. Junior had apparently gone out for a couple of beers.

"Sorry for wrecking the party."

"Penny, you did no such thing. Leonard and Amy Farrah Fowler conspired to bring chaos to the situation."

"So what now?"

"Penny, you need some time and some space. You may also wish to speak with your new therapist."

"I guess that makes some sense."

"Leonard is gone but I suspect he will try to insert himself back into this situation as soon as he can."

"Yeah, he's already called my cell a bunch of times and keeps texting me. I deleted everything. I know I have to speak with him. I owe him that much. But right now I'm not even sure what I want to say."

Nora joined the conversation.

"Penny, listen, I don't know all the whys and wherefores or details of what's going on here. Alex and I were thinking you need some time and space and could maybe come stay with us for a couple of days. We have a spare room. We can be there for you or we can find somewhere else to be so you have some time to yourself. No one will tell anyone where you are. How's that sound?"

"Actually it doesn't sound so bad. Not really that sure I want to be alone, though."

"People have told me I'm a pretty good sounding board."

"Penny, you should probably leave your phone at home because you know Leonard'll probably try the same crap Amy was doing and track you," added Missy.

"Okay, I'm just gonna go put some stuff together. Okay?"

"Want some company?" asked Alex.

"Sure. Nora, you come too. Okay?"

Penny, Alex and Nora went across to 4B to gather Penny's things.

"Wow, Leonard must have thrown some tantrum. This place is a wreck."

"Sorry to say that it looked pretty much like this before. The broken dishes and cracked picture frames are new but the rest…it's a pretty small apartment and Leonard has a lot more crap than I thought he did. This is just gonna take me a few minutes."

"Penny, don't forget to leave your phone here. We can pick up something at the mall that you can use for a few days."

"Yeah, Leonard can be pretty persistent when he wants something."

_Back at 4A_

"Sheldon, Penny really has to figure out the next steps for herself."

"I know, Missy. I know. I just want to be there for her."

"I think she knows that. And if she needs you she knows where you are. But she has to figure out what she wants to do about Leonard. She has all the information she needs. Give her the space."

"Alright."


	37. Chapter 37

**37**

_The next morning_

"Shelly. Ya got company," called Missy.

Sheldon came out of his room to find Howard Wolowitz and Rajesh Koothrapali waiting in the living room.

"I see Leonard has already sent his emissaries. I'll save you both some time. Penny is not here and I will not reveal her location."

"What are you talking about, Sheldon? We're not here to see Penny."

"No, we were hoping to speak with you."

"So Leonard didn't call upon you last night with a self-serving version of the events that transpired here?"

"No. I was out with Bernie."

"And I was with Emily."

"We had stuff we needed to explain to them."

"Leonard phoned us both but we ignored the messages. We did not wish to be distracted from our deliberations."

"I don't understand."

"The FBI coming around and asking about the rocket fuel last week sort of set us both off."

"Indeed. We were never involved with him taking that fuel."

"That was all him."

"But knowing Leonard we have a pretty good idea that he'll try to look innocent and eventually try to shift all the blame to the two of us. And you."

"You've known Leonard longer than I but I'm forced to agree."

"So Raj and I started talking last week."

"We've both decided to speak to Gabelhauser about what happened in the Arctic to give him a clearer picture of what type of scientist and person Leonard really is."

"You realize that this could possibly cost you both your positions."

"That's why we each took our sweeties out for a fabulous dinner last night. It's why we weren't even available to come by for the fireworks."

"We told them what we did and what we're planning to do in an attempt to set things right."

"We wanted their support, but we were also prepared to lose them. We had to be honest with them. It was the right thing to do. There should be no secrets."

"Bernie's still pretty pissed off at me. But she said that if I didn't speak up about it things would get worse. She used the "D" word."

"Emily is also quite angry with me. She isn't answering my calls. I hope I haven't lost her. But I am resolute."

"I can't ask you to speak with Gabelhauser on my behalf. What happened in the Arctic was my responsibility. I misjudged my ability to lead the expedition. I was unfortunately mistaken in selecting you two and Leonard to accompany me. And I jumped to an erroneous conclusion based upon the information you fed me at Leonard's behest. And then I sent that misbegotten email to everyone."

"Which would never have happened if we didn't feed you false results. Your career has suffered because of our actions and you've never said a word. We need to right the karmic scales, Sheldon. You must allow us to do this."

"Obviously I can't stop you. I will, however use whatever influence I have to keep you in your positions."

"That's not so important right now. So what exactly happened last night? And why would Leonard want us to speak to Penny."

"Leonard took it upon himself to invite Amy Farrah Fowler to last night's gathering and some disgusting activities of hers were exposed. And Penny announced some wonderful career-related news, which Leonard did not react to favorably. His role in subverting my career path was exposed. Penny asked Leonard to leave and she is temporarily staying elsewhere in order to determine her next actions."

"Wow, miss one dinner party…"

_Next: Penny and Nora spend time together. What could happen?_


	38. Chapter 38

**38**

_Meanwhile, at Alex & Nora's apartment_

Penny slept until after 11. She woke up refreshed and a bit disoriented. She went over the events of the previous evening in her head and decided that she still needed a bit of space before she wanted to think any more about them. Or Leonard. What she really needed was a distraction. She walked out of the bedroom and headed for Alex and Nora's kitchen hoping there was coffee.

"Good morning, Penny."

"Morning, Nora. Oh, thank God you made coffee. I could use a cup or ten. What's going on?"

"Well, Alex had one of her science brainstorms last night so she's going to the university to get everything written down. We have a "No whiteboards in the apartment" rule. If we didn't she'd work 24 hours a day."

"What about you? I was kinda hoping we could hang out."

"Well, I just got a call from a bunch of artists who get together on Sundays. Their model canceled at the last minute and they offered me double my usual rate if I can be there in an hour."

"Well, you've gotta go then. Not really sure if I want to hang by myself though."

"Hey, you're welcome to come with. I'm pretty sure that this isn't a place where you'd run into Leonard."

"That's for sure. There isn't an artistic bone in his body. And if there is he's probably taking a pill for it."

"So come on along. Grab one of Alex's sketch pads."

"I'm really not that much of an artist."

"Don't worry about it. You can keep me company. And we can kind of talk while I'm posing."

"Okay. Do I have time to take a quick shower?"

"You're gonna need to make it real quick."

"On my way."

On their way over to the studio where Nora was going to work, Penny had some questions for her.

"So how much do you usually get for a gig like this?"

"Usually it's sixty to seventy five dollars an hour. They're paying me one fifty an hour for today."

"Didn't think artists could afford that much."

"They like having a live model that knows what he or she's doing. They pass the hat. It works out. I've worked for these particular folks a few times before as a group and some of them individually. A really nice bunch of men and women. All pros. I've been to more than one gallery show of theirs and found myself face to face with me. Painted me. Sketched me. Sculpted me. It never gets old."

"So you're kind of their muse."

"I'm not sure I'd go that far."

"If I'd known that you could make that kind of money I probably would have considered doing some modeling myself."

"I'm kind of curious, Penny. Sheldon told us that before he hired you that you hadn't worked at all for a long time. Why didn't you try modeling?"

"Yeah. It's not like I'm shy. But I'm pretty sure Leonard wouldn't have gone along with it."

"Doesn't like to share, huh?"

"That's part of it. He's got a kind of a jealous streak. He also doesn't want me working. He wants to start working on having a family."

"Is that what you want? You sure that's a good idea right now?"

"Yeah, I know. We're really not on the same page on a bunch of stuff."

"So why marry him?"

"I keep asking myself the same question lately."

The studio was a loft in Glendale. Nora parked her car and Penny accompanied her upstairs. As soon as they entered Nora spotted the guy who hired her and went over to give him a hug. Penny couldn't help but be surprised.

"Stuart!?"

"Oh, um. Hi Penny. What are you doing here?"

"Nora's kind of a new friend of mine. Thought I'd come along and see what she was up to."

"You guys know each other?" asked Nora.

"I've known Stuart for years. He owns the comic book store the guys go to every Wednesday."

"Stuart's been part of this little artist's collective forever. Wait a second. Stuart, I've been modeling for you on and off for two years and you never thought to mention you own a comic book store?"

"Um, well, outside of ComicCon, telling women you own a comic shop is not exactly a way of keeping a conversation going."

"Yeah. I guess I get that. Well, you should probably be prepared to see wearing clothes me visiting your shop sometime soon. I've got a serious comic book habit and have for years. So, how soon do you want me to get started and how do you want to handle it?"

"So, um, there's still a little problem."

"I thought I was solving your problem."

"You are. Partially. But there were actually supposed to be two models working together. The one we originally had was supposed to bring another model along. And I promised everyone we'd have two models. I'll probably need to refund a bunch of money or I'll end up posing myself which I really, really don't want to do."

"Stuart, give me a minute."

Nora dragged Penny off to the side.

"What do you think, Penny?"

"What do you mean?"

"You want to clear your head. Trust me, this is a really good way of clearing your head. Gives you some interesting perspective. And you'll make a little money too."

"I don't know. It's not like I'm shy but being naked in front of a bunch of strangers…"

"All you need to do is follow my lead. It's really easy. It's kind of like meditating."

"Um, let's talk to Stuart first. I need to ask him something."

They walked back over to Stuart.

"Stuart, Penny is considering helping you out of your bind but she has a couple of questions."

"Um, okay?"

"Stuart, if I do this you are to never, ever mention it to the guys. Especially Leonard. Can you promise to do that?"

"Um, yeah. Okay. And I'll pay you the same rate I'm paying Nora. And I promise that I won't say anything. The guys really aren't interested in this part of my life anyway. I don't think it would ever come up."

"Okay. So what now?"

"There's dressing room over on the side where you can leave your stuff. I figure we'll start with three or four 5-minute poses to get everyone warmed up. Then a couple of 15-minute poses. We'll finish with one half-hour pose. Will that work, Nora?"

"Yeah, that should be fine. Penny, just follow my lead. Trust me, this'll be fun."

"I could use a little fun."

_Next: Penny and Nora. Gratuitous nudity._

_A/N: Based on the reviews, follows and favorites I see a bunch of new folks are reading this story. Welcome to my corner of the Big Bang Theory multiverse. A couple of you are worried that I may leave you hanging and never finish the story. First, I've known how this story ends from the moment I started it. Second, I have finished every story I've ever posted. Third, I won't be driven away by those members of the TBBT fan community that are so insecure in the canon version of the couplings that they try to drive other versions away. They just piss me off and make me continue writing (and do nastier and nastier things to their favorites). So, enjoy the rest of the ride. We're headed towards the end, well, at least the end of this part of the story._


	39. Chapter 39

**39**

_Back at the Cooper Apartment_

A short while after Howard and Raj left, Sheldon's phone rang.

"Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

"You idiot!"

"Hello, Bernadette."

"What kind of a scientist are you?"

"A theoretical physicist. I thought you knew that."

"I'm not so sure. A real scientist wouldn't let someone destroy their work and their reputation like you did, Sheldon."

"Howard told me that he explained what happened in the Arctic to you."

"Yeah my putz of a husband told me a lot of things last night. I just can't believe that you would let Leonard get away with that crap. He's supposed to be your friend."

"There were extenuating circumstances, Bernadette."

"Extenuating, shmextenuating, it's just a bunch of crap. You lived with that asshole. You stood by while Penny fucked that asshole and you never said a word to her or anyone else about what kind of person he really is."

"On multiple occasions I opined that their relationship was doomed."

"Yeah, but you never told her that is was doomed because your ex-roommate is a piece of shit. And now they're engaged. How could you let that happen?"

"I believe that Penny is reconsidering that situation."

"I haven't seen Penny in a few weeks, but the last time I saw her she couldn't take a crap without Leonard agreeing that it was a good idea."

"Things in Penny's life are beginning to change. She is now working for me and doing quite well. She has been offered a very interesting opportunity with Wil Wheaton."

"And you know that Leonard will do whatever he can to undermine her confidence. He's been doing it for years. And I'm sorry to say that I've been pushing her toward him along with your girlfriend."

"Amy Farrah Fowler and I no longer have a relationship of any kind."

"That isn't what she told me. She said that all she needs to do is get you alone and she'll convince you to do whatever she wants. And she wants Penny out of your life and your sister back in Texas."

"Amy Farrah Fowler has her own issues that I expect will soon require her full attention. She has been barred from my home and my workplace."

"Sheldon, the entire world knows your schedule. If she wants to see you she will."

"I suspect the FBI will have something to say about that."

"I don't understand."

"I suspect that Amy is assuming that the circumstances that eliminated all of her research funding and her position will be resolved in her favor quickly. I am given to understand that will not happen and that her situation will undoubtedly get worse."

"Sheldon, don't you feel any sympathy for her. You two were together for a long time."

"Amy is suffering for decisions she made long before she met me. And while we were together she forced and intimidated me into actions I was uncomfortable with then and regret now. I feel no remorse whatever over her situation."

"Remorse? Did you do something?"

Sheldon quickly defelected.

"Bernadette, I am sorry for anything that happens to Howard or to Raj because of the Arctic situation. I am grateful that they are finally taking responsibility for their actions. However, I do not blame them. I blame Leonard for the entire situation. Leonard now finds himself in a situation similar to that of Amy Farrah Fowler. Actions he took on his own are now coming back to haunt him. The Arctic situation only underscores the kind of scientist and person he is. Hopefully most of the judgment will fall upon him. I promise you, as I promised Howard and Raj, that I will do what I can to keep them in their positions. As for Leonard…"

"Sheldon, what about Penny. Whatever happens to Leonard will happen to Penny too."

"Hopefully not. Penny is already uncomfortable with Leonard's recent actions and things she has now heard about. She has the support of her friends, old and new. I believe she will come through this stronger. And hopefully without Leonard."

"She'd better, Sheldon. As for Howard, he needs to be a man and take any punishment coming his way from the university because that'll be easy compared to what'll still be coming from me."

_A/N: Sorry. Pacing demanded that this chapter be inserted before Penny, Nora and gratuitous nudity. Next chapter. I promise._


	40. Chapter 40

**40**

"Sweetie, you're a natural."

"Um, thanks," Penny responded as she stretched and loosened up between poses. She was still getting used to not wearing anything in front of a room full of strangers but was starting to be able to feel like they weren't even there.

"While we're on a break you should go around and check out what folks are doing."

"Okay."

Penny put on a robe and wandered around the room gazing approvingly and occasionally mystified at the work she saw on the easels spread around the loft. Remembering how good an artist Stuart was and their history, Penny was curious about his work. He showed her page after page of quick sketches.

"Wow, Stuart. I thought that sketch you did of me when we first met was good. These are amazing."

"Well, I've been working really hard at my art, especially while the store was being rebuilt, and you guys are just really good subjects. It's not that hard to come up with something that looks good."

"Well, I'm just really impressed. Stuart, this isn't weird for you is it?"

"Penny, um, why would it be weird?"

"Well, we dated a couple of times and we hang out socially sometimes and now you've seen me naked."

"Okay, first of all, we went out a long time ago and nothing really happened. You were in love with Leonard then even if you didn't know it. Now you guys are together like you're supposed to be. This, what you're doing here, this is just a job. I, um, don't want to insult you, but when I'm drawing you here I'm not really drawing Penny, I'm working with the shapes and the light and the balance. It's an exercise that really doesn't have a lot of personal stuff involved."

Penny tried to ignore what Stuart said about her and Leonard. It wasn't the time or place to discuss it.

"Okay. But like I said, I really like the sketches I've seen."

"Well, hopefully you guys come up with something really good for the half-hour pose. I do my best work when I can take my time."

"Well, I'm sure Nora and me will figure something out."

Penny and Nora wandered around the room looking at more sketches and charcoals and pastels and paintings until it was time to get back to work.

"So, Penny, this is a long pose so we need to be reasonably comfortable. I think I have an idea if you're okay with it."

"Try me."

"Well, so far we've been standing and sitting next to each other but there hasn't been a lot of interaction, not a lot of stuff that challenges the artists to present something more than just bodies. How about we hug each other? Sort of like lovers. Would you be comfortable with that?"

"Not sure that comfortable would be the right word, Nora. But, yeah, let's give it a shot."

Penny and Nora took off their robes and stepped back up to the little platform they'd been posing on. They both sat down facing each other and tentatively wrapped their arms and legs around each other. Penny felt a little weird because she'd never really been in that close to another woman like that but with Nora it felt really comfortable. They talked a little about where exactly their hands would be. Penny lowered her head to Nora's shoulder, but facing away from her neck towards the artists, and closed her eyes.

"Comfortable, sweetie?"

Penny did feel comfortable. And safe. She concentrated on herself and Nora and set herself.

"Wake me up if I start snoring."

Later, as Penny and Nora were getting dressed, Stuart came over.

"That last pose was perfect. Thank you. Nora, you were great as always. And Penny, if you ever want to do this again let me know. You are really good."

"Thank you, Stuart."

Stuart then game each woman a wad of cash.

"Sorry for all the singles. And Penny, here's one more thing."

Stuart handed Penny his sketchbook.

"Stuart. This is your work. I can't accept it."

"Penny, what I do here is process to help me get better at my art. The stuff in this book won't ever be more than that. But you like it. It's of you so you should have it."

"Stuart, the last time we did this I gave you my number."

"Penny, we're friends. The only thing I'm looking for out of this is maybe you coming back to do it again sometime."

"Okay. I'll think about it. I'm pretty busy these days and getting busier but I really will think about it. If you ever get stuck again go ahead and give me a call. I might say yes. Of course it'll help if Nora's here too."

"Sure."

As they left the loft and headed to Nora's car, Penny turned to Nora.

"You were right, you know."

"I usually am. What about?"

"Posing really helped me clear my head and get some perspective. I think I know what I need to do."

"And…"

"Right now I need to get some food. I never realized that standing around naked was such hard work."

"Let's head back home. Pretty sure there are some goodies in the fridge. And I don't know about you, but I could sure use a shower and a nap."

When Nora and Penny returned to Alex and Nora's apartment, Alex had not yet returned from the university. While Penny showered, Nora made sandwiches. After they finished eating, Penny went to take a nap and Nora took a shower.

Penny woke up close to dinner time. She checked her phone, deleted a bunch of messages and texts from Leonard, found a text from Sheldon and responded and then wandered out to the living room. She found Alex looking at Stuart's sketchbook.

"Penny these are really good. You should think about getting a couple of them framed. I can't believe Nora convinced you to pose."

"You know, I kinda can't believe it myself. But I really enjoyed it. And Nora said it would help me clear my head. And I think I did. Sort of like when _you_ use your other muscles to sketch and get the science-y stuff out of your head."

"So do you know what you're going to do?"

"Not completely. I want to talk to my therapist again. I called her and I have an appointment tomorrow night. And I still need to speak with Leonard, of course. But not till after that. Probably not for a couple more days. Are you okay with me staying here for another couple of days? If it's a problem…"

"Penny, we like the company and you need the space. Stay as long as you like."

"If you want you can move in. You shouldn't be living with that creep," Nora called out from the bedroom as she was coming out to the living room not wearing a thing.

"Um, Nora…," said Alex.

"What, babe?"

"We have company."

"Penny's seen the show. You're looking at the proof in that sketchbook that she more than saw the show."

"Penny, I apologize for Nora. She likes to shock people by walking around with nothing on."

"Alex, it really doesn't bother me, and it is your house. You shouldn't have to change your behavior because of me being here."

Nora walked over to Alex, took the sketch pad out of her lap and sat in it herself, put her arms around Alex and started kissing her."

"Thanks, Penny."

"Nora," said a surprised Alex, "you'd better not be about to do what I think you're about to do."

Penny turned red with embarrassment. "Um, guys, do whatever you want. I'm going back to the bedroom. Just let me know when you're done. We're going out for dinner. My treat."


	41. Chapter 41 (slightly edited)

_A/N: I have slightly edited the first paragraph. If you've already read this chapter there's no reason to read it again. I made a mistake and corrected it. _

**41**

After Penny, Nora and Alex washed up and got dressed they headed out for some dinner. Since Penny really didn't know their neighborhood well she asked Nora and Alex to choose the restaurant. They picked a little bistro within walking distance. They sat at a little table in the corner.

"Figured you're finally ready to talk and didn't want to pick anywhere too loud or crowded. Or where you might run into anyone you know."

"Yeah, thanks Alex."

"So you said you figured some stuff out this afternoon?"

"I think so. A lot of stuff still isn't settled but I know a couple of things."

"Like what?"

"Well, when I finally decided to marry Leonard I really didn't have any other choice. I had no job, no money and no future except with him."

"And now?"

"My situation has changed. I can support myself in a way I never could before. I really like working with you and Sheldon. You guys treat me like I have a brain. Like I know what I'm doing. It makes me feel good about myself, something that never happened while I was at The Cheesecake Factory."

"Penny, you do have a brain. You're good at what you do and as time goes on and you learn more stuff Sheldon and I are going to give you more and more interesting stuff to do. You're a really important part of what we're doing at CalTech."

"Thanks, Alex. In the eight years I was at The Cheesecake Factory nobody ever said anything like that to me. Nobody ever treated me as anything more than a cheesecake delivery system."

"Kiddo, you were wasting your time at that place. Waitressing is a crap job. Never making enough money to get by and depending on getting the right shifts where you have to flirt with and kiss customer's asses for tips. That's no way to live."

"Tell me about it. And now with the Wil Wheaton thing about to happen I have a chance to do what I came out here to do in the first place. And actually make some money doing it. And I won't have to depend on Leonard for everything. I'm gonna be able to pay him back money he loaned me and get rid of the crap car he got me and buy a new one with my own money."

"Not to mention the odd modeling gig here and there."

"Yeah, I'm not exactly ready to commit to doing that. But it is really nice to have some options for the first time in my life."

"Penny, you're kind of avoiding the lactose intolerant elephant in the room."

"Yeah, I know."

"So what are you going to do about Leonard?"

"I'm still not entirely sure. We are definitely so not ready to be married. Or even live together. I'm pretty sure of that."

"Well, duh."

"And I don't think we're even on the same page on a lot of stuff like kids and where we live and even how we live."

"Like…"

"Like I've been saying, he was okay with me not working. And as long as that only meant not being a waitress or doing soft porn gorilla movies I was okay with that too. And I think Leonard really enjoys being the breadwinner. Maybe a little too much."

"But things have changed."

"I've never had a job that really meant anything to me before. And I've never been hired for a gig because of who I am and what I know and not what I look like."

"But what you look like sure didn't hurt your chances."

"Yeah, but at the audition, when I was actually involved in a conversation with Wil and George Takei and holding my own, I don't know if I can really describe what that felt like."

"It felt like you were where you were supposed to be, didn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess it did."

"Penny, I kinda know Leonard. He's not going to understand that. I think he expects to be the center of your universe. He wants you to need him."

"For a long time I thought I was okay with that. But I'm finding things out about him that I don't really like very much."

"Like…"

"Ever since I started working with Sheldon, before you got back Alex, Leonard has been trying to undermine it. He keeps accusing Sheldon of doing something underhanded. And he's sure that Missy is going to run back to Texas any day now."

"And…

"Don't tell Sheldon, but I overheard part of what he said the other night. Nobody has ever spoken about me like that. I know how much he really cares about me. And I know Missy is here for the long haul. What's going on with her and Sheldon and the baby is really working for all of them. I don't think I've ever seen Sheldon happier."

"Penny, you kind of sped right through the Sheldon and you part."

"Yeah, I guess I did that on purpose. I just don't even want to think about that until I figure out me and Leonard."

"Can you even go back to living in that tiny apartment with him?"

"I don't think so. Telling him that is part of what I still need to figure out."

"The offer we made before is serious. If you want to stay with us you can stay as long as you like. Permanently if you want."

"You don't want to do that. You guys are a new couple. You don't need a third wheel hanging around all the time."

"How about we figure that out when the time comes. Just know that it's a legitimate option. Besides, there's a three-bedroom apartment available on the top floor that we've had our eye on. And it has exclusive access to the roof. The two of us can't quite swing it but if we had a third…"

"Okay, I'll think about it."

"And back to Leonard."

"I'm going to tell him that we shouldn't be living together yet. That we aren't really ready for that."

"Penny, you know that's only a part of what's wrong."

"I know. Finding out what he really did to Sheldon in the Arctic and how he completely got away with it… it really bothers me. Now I know why he never talked about it. It's like I don't really know him. And when I think about the last seven years and all of the stuff that's happened between us, I'm not sure I can just sweep that stuff under the rug like he can."

"Penny, I really haven't wanted to say anything about this. I didn't think there was really any point…"

"Spit it out, Alex."

"The thing that almost happened between me and Leonard a while ago…it was just as much him as it was me."

"I figured that. Leonard tried to act all innocent but I know he turned into a kind of horndog over the past few years."

"Sweetie, that wasn't the only time Leonard tried to make a move."

"Tell me."

"Last week, when he first met me, before he knew I was with Alex, he gave us both this really weird look. Like he thought he had an opportunity."

"Yeah, Leonard thinks he's really cool with his "puppy dog fuck me" look which is about as subtle as a sledgehammer."

"Penny, Nora and I talked about it. And now that we're kind of becoming friends… We both think you marrying Leonard is a mistake. A big mistake."

"I'm starting to think that myself, but I'm not totally there yet. Leonard has been there for me for a really long time. And I do love him. At least I love the Leonard I thought I knew. And I believe that he loves me."

"Except when he found someone else who he thought was more easily available."

"Yeah, like Priya or Sheldon's slut professor friend or Leslie Winkle or Dr. Stephanie."

"Or me."

"I wasn't gonna say that Alex."

"It's okay. Real friends are honest about stuff like that."

"So that's kind of where I'm at right now. It's still a little confusing. I figure I'll talk to my therapist Melanie tomorrow and then hash this out with Leonard on Tuesday."

"What are you going to do till then? If I know Leonard he'll be at our office door when we get there tomorrow morning."

"Yeah, I figured that too. But I have to put him off. I've got a bunch of work on my desk and I'm gonna be tied up. Plus tomorrow Sheldon has the baby in the morning and that means we have lunch with Missy. And I can't leave Sheldon alone in the office or let him walk across the campus with the baby alone."

"I don't understand," Nora responded.

"Yeah, I kind of picked up on what's been going on," added Alex.

"Nora, for some reason the girl grad students have always had a thing for Sheldon. They're always offering him free meals and to help him out with his work and…"

"Remember, I know a lot of those girls, Penny. Be blunt, they want to fuck him."

"Yeah, but Sheldon being Sheldon he's never really picked up on it. And Amy did a pretty good job of scaring them off."

"Something Dr. Fowler really didn't have to work very hard at."

"Yeah, anyway, Sheldon with a baby in a Babybjorn is sort of like putting honey out for fire ants. Whenever he has the baby there is like a never-ending stream of hot young grad students bringing him food, offering to babysit, and I suspect making other offers he's either ignoring or doesn't understand. If I let him walk across the campus with the baby without me as protection we might never see him or the baby again."

"Wow. Sheldon's cute and all but…"

"Yeah, it's kind of crazy. Anyway, that kind of means my day is committed tomorrow and then I have therapy. Junior is still at my place and he's leaving Tuesday morning, so I think I'd like to stay with you guys again tomorrow night. I have a wardrobe thing for Wil's show in the afternoon and I figure I'll deal with Leonard after that."

"And you think Leonard is going to go along with that."

"I'm not gonna give him much of a choice."

_A/N: This was another one that was tough to get right. I hope that I communicated that Penny is still waking up to her evolving situation and she's figuring out that decisions she made when she was in a completely different state of mind may no longer make sense._

_Next: Amy and Leonard try to insert themselves back into the picture with unexpected results. _


	42. Chapter 42

_A/N: I made a little mistake last chapter. Alex and Nora did NOT share a bottle of wine at the bistro. Nora is a recovering alcoholic as I established earlier and Alex is supporting her. It's been corrected, but those of you who may have read it prior to my late night correction, please excuse the error. Whoops._

**42**

Leonard unsuccessfully attempted to reach Howard and Raj on after he was asked to leave 2311 North Los Robles Saturday night in an attempt to find somewhere to stay temporarily. He ended up staying in his lab at the university, sending anonymous negative tweets to Wil Wheaton about how bad his SyFy program was and how soon it would be cancelled, and signing Sheldon up for spam email.

Sunday afternoon he called Amy Farrah Fowler.

"Last night didn't exactly go as expected, did it?"

"No, Leonard, it did not. And I am quite upset."

"Have you considered what you'll try next?"

"I need to separate Sheldon from his idiot sister and unfortunately, my bestie. If I can only find a way to get Missy out of that apartment permanently."

"I have an suggestion. It's worked before."

"Please tell me Leonard."

"You should call Sheldon's mom and tell her all the things Sheldon is doing and that he's trying to break up with you. She'll probably fly up and drag Missy back to Texas herself. I'm going to call Penny's dad myself. He really loves me."

"I'm certain that I can convince Sheldon's mother that I am her only viable route to grandchildren via Sheldon. And of course his eventual happiness and success."

"Wyatt already thinks I'm the best thing to ever happen to Penny. If she starts getting pressed by her dad and she'll have no choice but to get back together with me and stop working."

"I was unaware that there was a rift."

"Penny heard some silliness last night after you left. It's not a big thing, just a misunderstanding. It's just hanging around with Sheldon and his family made it seem bigger. I just need to get Penny alone to fix things. I love her but she's pretty gullible. As soon as I can get her in the bedroom and feeling better about me I'm sure I can fix everything. I'm the king of foreplay and after that I'll give her the best 9-12 minutes she's ever had. Then I can convince her to quit her stupid job and give up on acting like she's supposed to."

"That Wil Wheaton is the devil. He probably thought this whole thing up to wreak havoc with your betrothal. He seems to enjoy creating tension for devoted couples."

"Yeah. He's screwed things up for me and Penny before. I just need to remind her why she chose me."

"I am aware that Mary Cooper is in church and partakes of church-related activities until late on Sundays. I will telephone her tonight."

"And I'll surprise Penny tonight and call her dad tomorrow to seal the deal."

Late Sunday night Leonard crept up the stairs of 2311 North Los Robles hoping he didn't run into anyone. He quietly unlocked the door and tiptoed in. The lights were out. He'd spent several hours on Google figuring out what he could do to sexually rock Penny's world so much that she would forget all about what happened at the dinner party and the Arctic fiasco. He took off all his clothes, tiptoed into the bedroom and crawled under the covers next to the figure sleeping there. He reached around and…

"What the fuck!"

Leonard then found himself on the floor with a bloody nose.

The lights came on and Leonard found a very large, very naked George Cooper, Junior towering over him.

"Where's Penny? I checked and her phone says she's here."

"Well she _ain't _here. And if I recall she said she don't want to see you. Is this what you do when a lady says she don't want to see you? Because where I'm from doin' somethin' like this is a quick route to becomin' a gelding, though from what I see you're already damn close to it already."

"This is my apartment. I live here."

"Penny said stay away. I heard her. And she told Sheldon it was okay if I crashed here because I couldn't get no sleep on Missy's couch."

"Well I want you to leave."

"Not gonna happen, squirt. Now get out of here and you come back when Penny says you can. I'll be gone Tuesday."

"What if I say no?"

Balling his fist, Junior replied, "Well then this would be what my momma would call an opportunity."

Just then the apartment door opened and Sheldon walked in.

"Junior, why are you making so much noise?

Surveying the scene, Sheldon then asked, "Leonard, why are you here?"

"Shelly, I'm pretty sure he came here to surprise fuck Penny. Why else would he sneak in, get nekkid, crawl into the bed 'n' grab me?"

"Is this true Leonard?"

"Penny and I are engaged and what we do in our apartment is none of your business. Now tell me where she is and then both of you get the hell out."

"Leonard, Penny is residing elsewhere for the time being and does not wish me to disclose her location. She gave Junior permission to stay here until his departure for Texas. He signed a Temporary Residency Agreement that Penny electronically countersigned. I can send you a pdf if you like. If anyone is leaving tonight it will be you."

"And where the hell am I supposed to stay until Junior leaves?"

"You seem to have a good relationship with Amy Farrah Fowler. Perhaps there is space at her mother's home for you. Now you have disturbed Junior's circadian rythms as well as mine. Please put your pants on and depart."

"I swear, Sheldon, you're going to pay for this."

"Please submit an invoice and I'll consider an appropriate rental payment."

"Shelly, can I kick him down the stairs instead?"

Leonard grabbed his clothes and ran out the door.

"Hello, Mrs, Cooper? This is Amy Farrah Fowler, Sheldon's girlfriend."

"I don't think so."

"I am quite certain of my identity. Perhaps your advanced age is affecting your memory. If you like I can research and recommend a local neurologist."

"I know who you are. But you are not Shelly's girlfriend."

"But I am. There have been some recent issues but our relationship remains intact."

"Young lady, I saw what being your boyfriend did to my son. I have seen him in a variety of odd states but you helped put him in the worst state he'd ever been in."

"I am certain you are mistaken. Perhaps you have been misled by others. I called to enlist your aid in returning Sheldon to the path he should be on with me."

"Don't tell me I'm mistaken. I speak to my children regular. And what they don't tell me they tell their Meemaw and she tells me. Do you know why my only grandchild is in California while I'm in Texas?"

"That is one of the things I wish to speak with you about. Missy and your grandchild belong with you. They should return to Galveston immediately. Pasadena, California is not an appropriate place to raise a child."

"Do you think I'm an idiot, young lady? Missy and Shelly and I discussed the entire situation. I gave my children my blessing to go to that horrible place together. And one of the conditions for giving my permission was that they stay the hell away from you, may Jesus forgive my language."

"I don't understand."

"I do not know all of the details, but Missy explained what the cost of Shelly having a relationship with you is. And I saw it. Stay away from my family."

"But I called to enlist your aid."

"I spoke with Shelly the other day. He sounded happy. Shelly has never sounded happy in his life. And he told me how well Missy is doing in her new job. He's proud of her. And she's makin' more money than she could ever make here. She can support herself and her son and Shelly is playing a big role in their lives. My children are actin' like a family. Ya know what, that makes me real happy. If I didn't have Meemaw, my church and my friends here in Galveston I'd be movin' to the land of the heathen to be with 'em. And you'd best be glad I'm not there in person. Because if you tried to pull the, pardon me, crap that I think you're tryin' to pull right now I'd tan your hide, and not in the way that Shelly wrote you seem to like."

"But…"

"I advise you hang up, lose my phone number and forget you ever knew the Coopers, Sheldon especially. I'd rather he spend the rest of his life alone than be with someone who steamrolled him and damaged him like you did. Goodbye."

And Mary Cooper hung up. And then immediately dialed Missy.

"Hi, Momma."

"You were right, honey."

"She called?"

"Yup. And I wish I could have seen her face when I tore into her. She thought she was such a smarty-pants she could roll all over me like she did Shelly."

"I wish I could have seen that too."

"Is Junior behaving himself?"

"Well, not at first, but he made up for it and everythin's okay now."


	43. Chapter 43

**43**

_Early Monday morning_

Leonard picked up the phone in his lab and dialed Omaha, Nebraska.

"Queen Farm. This is Wyatt."

"Good morning, sir. It's Leonard. Leonard Hofstadter."

"Hello son. What's up? Is something wrong with Penny?"

"Um, no. Not really. We're just having a bit of a tiff. You know, like most couples."

"I understand. Penny's mother and I have had some real battles over the years. And Penny has her mother's temper."

"Yeah. She does get excited about stuff. I was hoping you could maybe help me out with something."

"What can I do for you, son?"

"Well, you know how Penny stopped working at The Cheesecake Factory a while back."

"About time if you ask me."

"Yeah. And then she was doing that movie that didn't work out."

"From what Penny told me you had something to do with that."

Not wanting to get into how he had contributed to Penny getting fired, Leonard quickly moved on. "Yeah, well since we decided to get married she hadn't been working at all and I was fine with that. We wanted to concentrate on having a family."

"Well, much as I'd love more grandchildren, I've learned to let Penny figure that out for herself."

"Yeah, well my old roommate just went and hired Penny as his assistant and a friend of his hired her to do some television work and, to be honest, it's messing with all our plans. I was hoping you could speak with Penny about it and help me convince her to quit."

"Son, is Penny enjoying what she's doing?"

"I guess, but it's still messing with our plans."

"Son, you should know by now that Penny is not exactly a making plans kind of girl. She does what she wants when she wants."

"But I really think Penny and I need to put our needs ahead of my ex-roommate's or his friend's."

"You should be saying that to Penny, not me."

"I was hoping you could back me up."

"I know my daughter pretty well and so should you, Leonard. Do you really think she'd respond well to me and you ganging up on her?"

"Probably not."

"Then you're on your own. Thanks for calling. Bye."

"Well that didn't go as well as expected," Leonard said to himself.

A short time later, as Penny and Alex approached their office suite, as expected they found Leonard waiting outside.

"Penny, we need to talk."

"This isn't the right time, Leonard. I have work."

"You've been avoiding me since Saturday. And why weren't you at the apartment last night?"

Trying to help Penny avoid a situation, Alex said, "Penny, I'm heading in. We have a lot to do today."

"Alex, I appreciate that Penny works for you but this is more important."

"Excuse me, Leonard, but my job is important to me and I do have a lot to do today. Alex, I'll be in in a couple of minutes."

"We need to talk Penny."

"Well, I have a lot on my plate today and I have therapy tonight. We can talk tomorrow night."

"And why did you start therapy without consulting me. I could have helped you with that. I'm sort of an expert."

"It was something I had to do for myself, Leonard. Like I said, we can talk about that and lots of other things tomorrow."

"I don't see why I have to wait. Our relationship should be your top priority."

"Our relationship is very important to me, Leonard. But I also have other things to pay attention to. Just like you do."

"It's not the same thing, Penny. This thing with Sheldon and Alex is just a job for you. I have a career."

"Yeah well I'm working on that too."

"This Wil Wheaton thing isn't that big a thing. It won't go anywhere."

"Thanks for the support, Leonard."

"That's not what I meant."

"Tomorrow night, Leonard. And, it would be nice if you showered before I see you again. You kind of stink."

"Yeah, well I had to sleep in my lab the past couple of nights because I couldn't find another place to stay and the radiation showers were shut down for repairs. And why the hell is Junior sleeping in our bed?"

"Junior is staying in our place because Sheldon asked if he could while I'm staying somewhere else for a while. And what the hell did you think you were doing last night sneaking into bed. You think I wouldn't hear about it?"

"I wanted to surprise you."

"Flowers are a surprise. Candy is a surprise. Theatre tickets are a surprise. There's another word for what you tried to do."

"I'm pretty sure Sheldon exaggerated like usual."

"I don't know. Did you sneak into the bedroom naked and get into bed with someone who told you to stay away?"

"You're making it sound like I'm a criminal. I just wanted to surprise you."

"Yeah, sneaking someone's my bed uninvited to have sex is something else, not a surprise."

"First, it's our bed. I have a right to be there. Junior doesn't."

"I'm glad Junior was there. And I'm glad he punched you in the nose. But it sure doesn't look like you learned anything from the experience."

"I want to know why you weren't there."

"Way to shift it back onto me, Leonard. I wasn't there because I need some space, okay. I have stuff to figure out."

"We're supposed to do that together."

"Yeah, well since we got engaged all that happened was you made decisions and I was expected to go along with them."

"That's how things work with us."

"Since when?"

"Since always."

"Yeah, that's gonna have to change. Tomorrow night at the apartment. We'll talk all of this through. I promise."

"Yeah, well we need to get everything back on track. I have a plan."

"You need to learn a new word, Leonard. The word is compromise."

"I know what compromise is. I lived with Sheldon for over ten years."

"I'll see you tomorrow, Leonard."

Penny turned and walked into the office suite, sat at her desk and just stared at the door.

"I'm betting that wasn't so easy was it."

"No, Alex, it wasn't. But it sure helped me with my decision."


	44. Chapter 44 (slightly corrected)

**44**

_Later that same day_

Leonard was sitting alone in the Physics Building cafeteria when Raj and Howard came in. They looked around for somewhere to sit but the only available seats were at his table. They walked over and sat down.

"Hello Raj. Howard."

"Phew. You know Leonard, you're kind of ripe."

"I had to sleep in my lab the past couple of nights and the radiation showers are out of order."

"Why didn't you just get a cheap hotel room?"

"Why didn't you guys pick up your phones when I called? I needed a place to stay."

"Bernie and I were out and we had some stuff we had to deal with. Personal stuff. Even if I picked up the phone you couldn't have stayed with us."

"And Emily and I were arguing all weekend. You wouldn't have been very welcome, dude."

"So I guess everyone was having romantic problems this weekend. And I bet somehow Sheldon was part of all of it."

"Dude, you really have to stop blaming Sheldon for everything that goes wrong in your life. Did you ever think that maybe it's just karma seeking balance for what you did to him?"

"What we did to him wasn't that horrible. He forgave us. He got over it."

"Leonard, we almost destroyed his career."

"He would have done that himself sooner or later. And now he doesn't even want to _study_ String Theory, let alone prove it."

"Yeah, but he _is_ studying it along with Alex and they're also developing other lines of research. And the university is totally behind them. They even gave Sheldon tenure."

"I'm the one who should have gotten tenure _and_ a bigger office _and_ an assistant. Can you imagine what it would be like to have Penny as _my_ assistant? Well, the office door would be locked _all_ the time, if you know what I mean."

"Leonard, have you been paying any attention to what's been going on around here for the last week. The FBI is investigating you. You're lucky you still have a job."

"They can't prove I did anything. Besides, you and Raj and Sheldon were all there. If I go down everyone goes down with me. Gabelhauser will never let that happen. It would make the university look ridiculous."

Raj and Howard looked at each other.

"I'm sorry Leonard, but I can't eat with the stink around here. I'm going to finish my lunch in my office."

"Raj, I'm coming with you. We still have that stuff to go over."

Raj and Howard left Leonard's table and the cafeteria. Once they were out in the hall they looked back to make sure nobody was behind them.

"Dude, speaking to Gabelhauser this morning was the right thing to do. I'm convinced of that more than ever now."

"Raj, you are so right. Leonard is absolutely planning to throw us and Sheldon under the bus to save his own ass."

"Feel like catching an afternoon matinee of _Guardians of the Galaxy_ so Leonard can't find us?"

"I was even thinking of taking tomorrow off but I think I want come in to see the fireworks now."

_At the same time, in Sheldon's office suite_

"Is Dr. Cooper in?" asked Dr. Gabelhauser.

"Absolutely. Go right on back, Dr. Gabelhauser," answered Penny.

"Thank you, Ms. Queen. And I haven't had the chance to welcome you to CalTech."

"Thank you, Dr. Gabelhauser. I hope that I'll be here for a long time."

"As do I."

Gabelhauser walked back and poked his head into Sheldon's office.

"Have you got a few minutes, Dr. Cooper?"

"Of course, Dr. Gabelhauser. Please have a seat."

"I'm going to close the door. This is private."

"Of course."

"I had a very interesting conversation with Dr. Koothrapali and Mr. Wolowitz this morning."

"I must admit that I was aware they would be coming to see you."

"I am very disappointed in you, Dr. Cooper."

"I don't understand."

"You permitted a pedestrian scientist like Hofstadter to almost derail your career."

"As I've said before, the responsibility was mine because I selected the team. It was a failure of leadership."

"I don't see it that way. I believe it was a failure of character, Hofstadter's."

"What are your intentions?"

"I haven't decided yet. I expect to hear from the FBI sometime later today or early tomorrow about the rocket fuel matter. I'll then be meeting with President Siebert and the board to determine what, if any, course of action is indicated. I've scheduled a meeting with Hofstadter for tomorrow afternoon."

"And what do you expect of me?"

"Nothing. Though I suspect you may have to contend with the aftermath if there is one. If things go badly for Hofstadter do you think it will cause problems for your assistant?"

"I expect that to some extent it will, but I intend to help her through it. I believe she will come out of it unscathed. In any case, she has requested and I have granted her personal time tomorrow afternoon to deal with some unrelated matters off-campus."

"And what do you believe we can expect from Hofstadter himself?"

"I'm not certain but I suspect that if things go badly he will attempt to minimize the situation then pout and yell and attempt to shift the blame. That is his pattern. He does not like taking responsibility for his own actions."

"I will inform you of our findings as quickly as I can."

"Thank you. Are Koothrapali or Wolowitz to suffer any sanctions?"

"What do you think?"

"I would prefer that they remain in their positions. A formal reprimand might be appropriate. Though it took a long time they did ultimately did do the right thing and took responsibility for their own actions. They have done valuable work for the university. And they are my friends."

"I thought Hofstadter was your friend."

"I thought so also. I was mistaken."


	45. Chapter 45

**45**

_Monday evening, the offices of Melanie Anderson, Penny's therapist_

"So, Penny, how are you today? You sounded a bit disturbed when we spoke over the weekend."

"Yeah, I guess I did. I'm sorry."

"That's nothing to be sorry about. You should be able to be comfortable telling me how you feel. You don't need my approval. If you feel badly tell me. If you're angry tell me. And, hopefully we'll be able to determine why you feel that way. And if it's something you need to talk through, well, that's why I'm here."

"Thanks. It's been a pretty intense few days. A lot happened. Not much of it is resolved. And I'm in the middle of making some pretty serious decisions."

"Is there a way to look at this one thing at a time?"

"I'm not sure. Leonard, my fiancée, is kind of in the middle of all of it."

"Does he know that?"

"Oh, he knows it. But he just doesn't think there's as big a problem as I think there is."

"So let's try and break it down."

"Okay, I wasn't comfortable telling him that I started seeing you at first. I kind of lied to him about the anti-depressants when he offered me some wine. I said I had an infection and couldn't drink. Or have sex."

"Do you trust Leonard?"

"I thought I did. But lately he's been acting like a jerk, especially since I started to work for Sheldon."

"His old roommate."

"Yeah. For some reason he thinks Sheldon is up to no good and he's gonna flake out."

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you think Sheldon is up to something?"

"If he is, he's doing it to help me. He could never do anything to hurt me. I'm sure of that."

"What about Leonard?"

"Could Sheldon do something to hurt Leonard? I didn't think so until Saturday."

"What happened on Saturday?"

"Sheldon and his sister Missy invited us and another couple to dinner and Leonard on his own invited Sheldon's ex-girlfriend who was definitely not welcome. Things got really messy and it came out that Leonard almost destroyed Sheldon's career sometime back. I didn't know. And I'm really ashamed that I didn't know."

Penny began to cry. She reached for a tissue.

"Take your time."

"A few years ago Sheldon led this big research expedition to the Arctic and he took Leonard and two other friends to assist him. When they got back Sheldon got really upset when he found out that they had played a joke on him with his data. He ran home to Texas and almost quit his job. I convinced Leonard and the others to apologize and bring him back. Leonard told me all was forgiven and everything had been settled and I slept with him for the first time that night. Nobody ever talked about it again. I found out on Saturday that their little joke had almost destroyed Sheldon's career and that it's affected all of his work since then."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I felt like Leonard had hurt my friend and I rewarded him for it. And it's not the only time I did that."

"Penny, did you know that you were rewarding Leonard's bad behavior at the time?"

"No?"

"Does Sheldon blame you?"

"No."

"Then you should probably stop beating yourself up for it, shouldn't you?"

"I guess. But when I found out about it on Saturday I made Leonard leave. And except for a couple of minutes this morning I haven't spoken to him since then."

"Why did you do that?"

"I needed some space. I started thinking that Leonard may not really be the person I thought he was. I mean, who does that to their best friend?"

"So you took some time."

"I've been staying with a couple of new friends. They've been really supportive and not pushy."

"I think you probably did the right thing. Have you reached any conclusions?"

"I think so. I think I need to take a step back. Leonard has been pushing to get married soon and think about moving and start a family and I'm just not ready. And I'm not even sure I want to any more."

"So what do you want to do?"

"I don't think I want to break up with him. I love him. But we aren't ready to live together. We're getting on each other's nerves way too much. And I can't get any time to myself. I'm going to ask him to move out or I'm going to move in with the friends I mentioned."

"Do you feel comfortable with that decision?"

"I do."

"When are you going to tell Leonard?"

"Tomorrow night. I already told him that I want us to talk things out tomorrow."

"I think that's good. You're taking control of your life. How is it going with the drinking? You thought you might have a problem stopping."

"To be honest, it really hasn't been an issue. I haven't had a sip since I started the anti-depressants and it never really occurred to me to take one. The people I'm staying with don't drink so that's helped. I think it'll be okay."

"That's good to hear. No side effects. Sleeplessness. Irritability."

"With what's been going on wouldn't that happen anyway?"

"You're probably right."

"I, um, did something I never did before yesterday."

"What was that?"

"My new friend Nora, who I'm staying with, models for art classes. I didn't want to stay by myself all day so I went along with her when she got called in for a job at the last minute. I kind of ended up working along with her posing naked for artists."

"How did you feel about that?"

"A little weird and nervous at first. But then I got comfortable and it was fun. And it turned out one of the artists was an old friend and he gave me the sketches he did of us and they're really good. Plus I got paid."

"So it was a good experience?"

"It was. And if all that crap with Leonard hadn't happened I wouldn't have had it. And it was weird. I was up there naked in front of a room full of mostly strangers and I felt like for the first time in a long time I was getting some perspective on my life. I guess you could say it was liberating."

"Interesting choice of words considering what you're about to try and do."

"Yeah, I guess it is."


	46. Chapter 46

**46**

After her therapy session, Penny decided to head over to 2311 North Los Robles, primarily to say goodbye to Junior, who'd be leaving the next morning, but to also let Sheldon and Missy know what she was planning to tell Leonard. Despite the changes that Sheldon had made to his life, Penny was still pretty sure that he wouldn't react well to the surprise she had in store for Leonard. She also had something else she wanted to share with Missy.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Cooper Family. _

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Cooper Family. _

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Cooper Family. _

Missy opened the door.

"Hi, sweetie. We weren't expecting you."

"Sorry I didn't call ahead. I guess I wasn't thinking."

"Well, I do recall saying that you are always welcome. So come on in. Sheldon's puttin' the baby to bed."

"Awww."

"So, what's goin' on with you?"

"Well, I'm just coming from therapy."

"How's that going?"

"I guess it's going okay. Only broke down crying once."

"Well, it's been a rough couple of days and you've got a lot on your mind. To be honest, I'm a little surprised you even showed up at work today."

"Yeah. It's weird. I know I should be a wreck about all the stuff that's going on. But I'm really not. I feel, I don't know, kind of calm."

"You've decided something, haven't you?"

"Yeah, pretty much. But that can wait until Sheldon comes out. First, I think I need to talk to Junior."

"Uh oh. Hey Junior, Penny wants to talk to you."

"Hi darlin'. I'm real sorry I put the hurt on Leonard last night."

"Junior, I wanted to apologize to you. Leonard had no right to do what he did. I just wish I could've seen what happened."

At that moment Sheldon came out to the living room.

"Penny, it was not a pretty scene. Two men stark naked about to come to blows."

Penny giggled.

"I will say though that Leonard looked very tiny as he lay on the floor attempting to protect his manhood."

"Is that what they call it, little brother? As far as I could tell, he has very little manhood to protect. I can't believe for a minute that he can satisfy you like a man should, Penny."

"Junior, you will not speak about Leonard's manhood or anyone else's in this house!"

"Sorry, Missy. But Shelly brought it up."

"Yeah, well I'm ending it."

Penny smiled at Missy.

"Thank you, Missy. And for your information, Leonard is very…enthusiastic."

"Indeed, when Leonard was still residing here and he and Penny were engaged in coitus she often requested more."

"Sheldon!"

"What?"

"Shelly, it's inappropriate for you to speak about what Penny and Leonard do in private."

"It wasn't private. I heard almost all of it. For years. Even through noise-cancelling headphones."

"Can we please move on? There's some stuff I want you guys to know about… so it isn't a surprise tomorrow."

"What's goin' on, sweetie?"

"Well, you guys know that Leonard and I have not exactly been seeing eye-to-eye on things since, well, since you got back Sheldon."

"I had surmised that. When I offered you your position and you accepted it I thought Leonard might object. He prefers to be the one making the decisions for the both of you."

"Yeah. I guess I let him do that for way too long. It's not like he really knows anything at all about how relationships are supposed to work. Everything he knows he got from TV, the movies and comic books."

"And his mother."

"Yeah, let's keep Beverly out of this. That's a whole other set of issues."

"So, what are you gonna to do, sweetie?"

"Okay, I'm not ready to end our engagement, but I am thinking about it. What I am ending for now is me and Leonard living together. I'm going to ask him to move out. I need some space."

"Penny, Leonard will likely not go along with that."

"I'm not exactly giving him much of a choice. If he doesn't move out, I will."

Sheldon looked alarmed.

"Penny, you can't move. Junior, stay and help me make Leonard move."

"Sheldon, I don't think we can make Leonard do something he doesn't want to do. If I have to move I am quite willing to do that."

"You aren't going to leave us, me are you."

"No, sweetie. If it ends up being me that moves Alex and Nora have asked me to move in with them. I'm pretty sure that could work while Leonard and I figure things out."

"Leonard will not like having difficulty accessing you."

"Maybe it's time Leonard learned that he might have to work a little harder for what he wants. Maybe a lot harder."

"Darlin', I thought we weren't gonna talk about Leonard's equipment, such as it is. And I caught a little glimpse of what he looks like when he works hard."

"Junior, I like you, but I really wish you wouldn't keep talking about Leonard's 'equipment'. There's more to a relationship than sex."

"Penny, your amorous history would belie that, and Leonard is lacking in so many more areas that his ability to satisfy you sexually. There is his lack of honesty, his inability to process most foods, his breathing difficulties and lack of stamina due to asthma, his scientific incuriosity, his treacherousness…"

"Enough, Sheldon. I know that you now see Leonard as a less than good friend. Please understand that I want to try and work things out before I consider doing something more drastic. I feel like I owe him that."

"Alright. Just know that we will be here for you no matter what. Except for Junior who is departing in the morning."

"Thank you. I appreciate that. Now, I'm pretty hungry. You guys don't have any food left from Saturday, do you?"

"We have lots, sweetie. In fact, we can give you some to bring back over for Alex and Nora. You're going back over there tonight, aren't you?"

"Yeah. I really like those guys. They've really been a big help figuring things out. And they're fun. Nora especially. She's getting me to do things I never would have thought of before."

"Like what, sweetie?"

"Missy, some things I really don't want to say in front of your brothers."

"I get that. Maybe later. Maybe all four of us can get together and have one of them Girls Nights Shelly told me about."

"That would be nice. And it sure would be different from the Girls Nights I used to have with Bernadette and Amy. Speaking of Amy, have you heard anything from her, Sheldon?"

"Nothing, Penny."

"She called Momma last night."

"Excuse me."

"Amy called Momma to try and get Momma to convince you to get back with her."

"Oh my. What did she say?"

"I don't rightly know for sure. What I do know is that Amy won't be callin' Momma again. Not if she don't want Momma flyin' up here to go after her."

"Perhaps I should call Mommy and find out what happened."

"Okay, Shelly. Junior, why don't you start warmin' some leftovers up for dinner. I think maybe Penny and I should have a word in private."

"Missy, why don't we go over to my apartment for a minute. I should probably pick up some more things. Who knows how long I'll be camping out with Alex and Nora?"

"Sounds good. And then we'll have us some dinner."

Over at her apartment, Penny grabbed some more clothes for work, underwear and a couple of pairs of shoes.

"First thing, Missy, we're supposed to be doing this therapy thing together."

"Wednesday after work. I already made the appointment."

"Good. I'm glad. Listen, how's Sheldon doing with all of the stuff that's going on. He's been really busy at work with meetings and Alex that I really haven't had a chance to talk to him."

"He's okay. I guess I'm a little surprised but he's handlin' stuff pretty well. I was a shocked he didn't lock himself up in his room on Saturday night with all the excitement. I think maybe he found a way to deal with it."

"How?"

"He plays with the baby. Sings _Soft Kitty_ a lot. I think maybe he sings it for himself as much as the baby."

"But he's okay. All this Amy and Leonard crap isn't going to send him running to Galveston again, is it."

"I don't think so, Penny. I think Shelly knows that he has people he trusts that he can go to if he's having a tough time. He knows we have his back."

"Good. I'm glad. I don't think I'd ever forgive myself if the crap that's going on with me and Leonard made things difficult for him."

"Penny, I think if Shelly was still close to Leonard it might be a problem. He's still bothered that you're upset but I told him that you're taking good care of yourself and that you have to figure things out with Leonard for yourself. You're doin' that so Shelly is waitin' until you need him. He'll be there for you. We all will."

"Thanks. Tomorrow's gonna be a rough day. I wish I didn't have this wardrobe thing but Wil said it was pretty important. And my agent wants me to pick up some papers the network said they'd have ready."

"And you're gonna show 'em to Shelly too, right."

"Yeah. But speaking of showing, I wanted to show you what I did yesterday."

"I was wonderin' why you were carryin' around that big sketchbook. Did you take an art class or somethin'?"

"Not exactly."

Penny opened up the sketchbook to her favorite sketch from the previous day, the last one Stuart did.

"Wow. You did do somethin' different. Is that Nora huggin' you?"

"Yup."

"There's nothin' goin' on with you two is there? Not that there's anythin' wrong with that."

"Nora and I are friends. That's it. Naked friends, but just friends. What do you think of the sketch?"

"It's beautiful. What are you gonna to do with it?"

"I think I want to get it framed."

"But where do you put something like that. Known' Leonard a little he won't want anybody seein' it. Hell, he'll probably have a fit that you posed without him knowin' about it."

"Yeah, I know. If I were living alone I wouldn't really have a problem with people seeing it. It's art. And I'm not gonna look like that forever. It'll be a nice thing to have."

"But with all this stuff up in the air?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna hide it in the back of the closet for now and maybe surprise Leonard with it when things are better between us."

"You really think that's gonna happen, sweetie, things getting' better I mean? He's probably gonna be pretty upset when you ask him to move out."

"If Leonard really loves me, like he's been saying forever, then he'll be willing to do the work to fix things. I changed a lot of things in my life for him. He should be willing to make some changes for me."


	47. Chapter 47

**47**

_The following afternoon at CalTech. Gabelhauser's office._

"Good afternoon, Dr. Hofstadter. Please have a seat."

"Thank you, Dr. Gabelhauser. May I ask what this meeting is about?"

"Ah, right to the point. Good. I was hoping we wouldn't need to dance around. I spoke with the local Assistant Director of the FBI this morning."

"And…"

"They have determined that there is not quite enough evidence to bring charges against you. They have suspended their investigation."

Leonard rose up in his seat defiantly. "Good. Because I didn't do anything wrong."

"That isn't what I said, Dr. Hofstadter. The FBI and the university are certain you removed that top-secret fuel from the lab and transported it to your home with the intention of giving a sample of it to Ms. Kim. She confirms it. Your colleagues and friends confirm it. And the damage to the elevator in your apartment building confirms it. However, since the fuel leaves no trace we have no actual evidence."

"So it's like it never happened."

"Dr. Hofstadter, it happened. No matter how many times you tell yourself that because you never gave the fuel to Ms. Kim the crime of espionage is obviated, we all know that you had the intent even if it was only to satisfy your libidinous desires."

"But you can't prove any of that. And even if you could, Cooper, Koothrapali and Wolowitz were also involved."

"And you believe that if you were to suffer any sanctions they should also? Is that correct?"

"Of course. It would only be fair."

"Ah. Fairness. An interesting point. Did you think it fair to subvert Dr. Cooper's research in the Arctic?"

"I should have known that Sheldon would eventually come running to you with a tale. So I played a little prank on him. And Wolowitz and Koothrapali helped."

"First, Dr. Cooper did not come running to me. From the moment he returned to campus from that misbegotten expedition he has taken complete responsibility for its failure. He went so far as to write letters of recommendation for you and the others for the work you did. He handled the matter like a professional, honorably. And I believe a bit stupidly."

"I don't understand."

"I believe he should have immediately reported you for academic malfeasance and had you terminated. But he was under the delusion that you were his friend and that a friend could never do something so horrible."

"It wasn't a big thing. Others have done worse. Wolowitz crashed the Mars Rover and screwed up his space toilet and he got away with it."

"Mr. Wolowitz 'got away' with nothing. Do you actually believe that he would have been permitted to go into space without coming clean on all of that? The crashing of the Mars Rover led to a very interesting discovery, a discovery that could have made his career and Wolowitz will never be associated with it nor will he ever be able to speak publicly about it. That was one of the conditions he had to accept in order to go to the International Space Station. And toilets break on Earth all the time. That one might not work correctly in space was no great surprise. Wolowitz is not the first scientist to have a space toilet problem and he likely won't be the last."

"But Cooper and Koothrapali helped him try to cover it up."

"Nothing of real importance was lost, just the records covering a few hours. And they were aiding a colleague."

"So was I."

"From what I understand, your contribution was screwing Wolowitz's date."

"Well, there are other things they did that were much worse. Both Cooper and Wolowitz have misused government resources and equipment like drones, spy satellites and NSA computers."

"And by doing so they exposed weaknesses in national security that have since been addressed. They unknowingly performed a service. How do you think the government discovers their security problems? They wait for very smart people to point them out. And then they often hire those smart people or provide them grant money."

"So they won't be punished?"

"I didn't say that. Both Koothrapali and Wolowitz have had letters of reprimand put in their files. They will need to work very hard over the coming years to erase the effect. However, Wolowitz has already through his work with NASA attracted quite a bit of funding to our university. And I had to fight off both JPL and NASA when they sought to hire him away."

"Well, I attract funding too."

"You fucked an old lady, Hofstadter. And she has since shifted her funding to Cooper."

"Speaking of Sheldon Cooper, what are you planning to do to deal with him and the things he's done?"

"Cooper has suffered for years. Every bit of his work he has ever done has been gone over with a fine-tooth comb to ensure that he didn't make any mistakes like the one you made it look like he made. His reputation was in tatters and he has had to work very hard to try to get it back. He still may never get the Noble prize he desires so much due to your efforts."

"And that's all?"

"No, we awarded him tenure and are insisting he continue to follow a course of research he would rather not follow. But in addition we are allowing him to branch out into other areas. Cooper has a brilliant mind and we expect great things from him. The university does not wish to lose him."

"What about me? I should have gotten tenure. I could do great research. I worked with Stephen Hawking after all."

"You worked _for_ Stephen Hawking, Dr. Hofstadter. And according to Dr. Hawking your primary contribution to the expedition was chips and dips."

"And I spent three months in the Arctic."

"Hofstadter, the less you say about the Arctic the better."

"Well, I still believe I deserve tenure."

"Dr. Hofstadter, you have been here for ten years and have yet to do a single piece of original research. You spend your days aping the work of better scientists, replicating their experiments and cajoling young women into your lab for sexual intercourse. You are aware that there are security cameras in the labs, are you not? Luckily for Ms. Queen and Dr. Winkle I have made certain the tapes were destroyed."

"I don't understand what any of this has to do with me getting tenure."

"Tenure is not something you get for showing up for work on time every day. It is a reward for scholarship and providing an example to our students and an investment in keeping a valuable asset at the university."

"What are you saying?"

"I met with President Seibert and the Board of Trustees after I spoke with the FBI. I recommended dispensing with your services immediately. I don't like you. And I don't trust you. I never have. You are a pedestrian scientist and an academic saboteur, if not an actual one. If word of your antics got out to the academic community at large it would be a significant embarrassment to the university. As it is, due to the FBI investigation a number of organizations refuse to fund any projects with which you are attached. You are a lousy example of a scientist for our students. However I was overruled. The board is too concerned with how things would look. And, to be honest, they are a bit afraid of your mother. When it comes up for renewal your contract will be renewed."

"And I'll be up for tenure next year?"

"No, Dr. Hofstadter, you will not. You are no longer on a tenure track. You are now an adjunct instructor. And you will be receiving a reduction in salary to reflect that. From here on you will receive one-year contracts, which will be renewed at either my discretion or that of my eventual successor, who is likely to be Dr. Cooper. And you will receive the same cost-of living increases in salary as any other university employee. Additionally your security clearance has been revoked and is unlikely to be reinstated here or at any other institution."

"But I'm getting married. I'm going to have a family. We want to buy a house."

"Well, then I suggest that you leave any improvements in your lifestyle to Ms. Queen. Because, if my records are correct, she now earns more than you."

"This is unacceptable."

"Take it or leave it, Dr. Hofstadter."

"Then I resign. Effective immediately."

Leonard dramatically stood up to leave the office.

"Sit down, Dr. Hofstadter. If you do indeed resign then you cannot be in this building without an escort. Your past behavior says you cannot be trusted. Luckily I anticipated this possibility and I have prepared the appropriate paperwork. Please sign where indicated. I have your final paycheck. Wait here for a security guard who will escort you to your lab where you will pack up only your personal items. All university property, laptops, cell phones or other equipment will remain behind. You will then be escorted out of the building. By the way, university policy requires that when asked for a reference the only information that we can provide will be that you did indeed work here. However, if you ever seek security clearance a great deal more information will come out, information you will not find flattering. Goodbye, Dr. Hofstadter."

_A/N: Another difficult chapter, but one I looked forward to writing. I hope you liked it. What will the fallout of Leonard's resignation be? How will it affect Penny? Sheldon? Stay tuned._

_On a related note, I'm sorry my posting has slowed a bit. I'm trying to continue to post daily but now that we've reached the most difficult part of the story I'm more concerned with getting it right than getting it out. I'm sure you agree. So don't worry if I skip a day or two. I will finish. I know how the story ends. We just have a major confrontation or two to get past._

_Thank you all for reviewing and following and favoriting. I do enjoy hearing from you and I'm happy to know that this story has led lots of new folks to my earlier work._


	48. Chapter 48

**48**

"Hello. Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

"Dr. Cooper, Gabelhauser here."

"Hello."

"Hofstadter resigned."

"Thank you for informing me. Was there a scene?"

"Not exactly. The board, President Seibert and I decided to remove him from the tenure track and reduce him to adjunct instructor."

"Thereby denying him any future at CalTech."

"Indeed. It was appropriate. We couldn't fire him. It would make us look stupid. But we don't trust him to work with his colleagues or our students. The result is best for the university. He has been escorted off the premises."

"Thank you for informing me, Dr. Gabelhauser."

Sheldon immediately took out his cell phone and hit a number on his speed dial.

"Dr. Beverly Hofstadter."

"Hello, Beverly."

"Hello, Sheldon. This is not our regularly scheduled time to chat."

"I have news for you concerning Leonard. It's serious."

"Please elucidate."

After Sheldon was through updating Beverly Hofstadter he tried to reach Penny but his calls went straight to voicemail. He then called Missy."

"Hi, Shelly."

"Missy, Leonard has resigned from the university and I can't reach Penny. I can only get her voicemail."

"Penny said she had a couple of meetings along with the wardrobe thing. She might have turned her phone off."

"I need to get home. I suspect Leonard will be awaiting her and I want to make certain she is prepared."

"I understand, Shelly. Let me pack up and get the baby. I'll pick you up in twenty minutes."

"Thank you."

Sheldon then went over to Alex's office.

"Alex, Leonard has resigned from the university. Missy is coming to pick me up. Please inform Koothrapali and Wolowitz."

"I'll take care of it Sheldon. Would you like me and Nora to come over to your place so we're there for Penny."

"That would be good. In a very short time Penny has come to depend on you and Nora a good deal."

"We like her Sheldon. She's a good person in a bad situation and she's trying to work through it."

"I'm going outside to wait for Missy. I'll see you shortly."

On his way out of the building Sheldon ran into Howard and Raj.

"Leonard…"

"We heard, Sheldon. What do you want us to do?"

"Meet me at North Los Robles. Penny doesn't know."

_A/N: This isn't much of a chapter, I know, but this and the next couple of chapters will serve as a bridge to Penny and Leonard's conversation. Pacing-wise it just didn't make sense to me to jump from Leonard's firing tight to that meeting. So, bear with me, I think it'll be worth it._

_Thanks again for playing along._


	49. Chapter 49

**49**

Leonard angrily left CalTech was driving home when his phone began playing the Wicked Witch of the West's theme from _The Wizard of Oz_.

"Hello Mother. This is really not a good time."

"Leonard, I've been made aware of a development regarding your employment at CalTech."

"Sheldon called you. He should really mind his own business."

"Would you have apprised me of the situation?"

"I suppose I would have eventually."

"What are your plans?"

"I resigned a half hour ago, Mother. I haven't had an opportunity to make plans."

"Then perhaps you shouldn't have resigned until you did."

"I didn't have a choice Mother. The university backed me into a corner."

"According to Sheldon, you backed into that corner of your own volition."

"Well, Sheldon would know. He's the one who got me into this mess."

"Leonard, I am well aware of the mess you are in. Not only was I apprised by Sheldon, but I was informed by your Dr. Gabelhauser and last week I was interviewed by the FBI."

"Why did the FBI interview you, Mother?"

"Their profiler wanted background information on you. They wished to ascertain whether you posed a threat to national security. As a neurologist, a psychologist and your mother I had valuable information."

"Which you gave them."

"Of course. You are aware that I do work for the government on occasion as well, are you not?"

"What did you tell them, Mother?"

"I informed them that your actions regarding the rocket fuel were likely not seditious or malicious but more likely inspired by a desire for coitus with that Joyce Kim person and that you were probably not dangerous just terribly self-centered and borderline sociopathic."

"Thank you, Mother. I'm certain the FBI appreciated your insight."

"Though why you sabotaged Sheldon's research in the Arctic I cannot understand."

"It was a joke, Mother. I don't expect you to understand it."

"Well, Leonard, what I do understand quite well is that it is unlikely that you will find another position at a university very soon if at all. It will take you some time. You have burned some significant bridges."

"You may be right, Mother. But I'm certain I will find another position eventually, a better position that will provide me and Penny with the future we deserve."

"What are your plans until then?"

"As I said earlier, Mother, I don't know."

"What about your fiancé, Leonard? Have you informed her of the situation?"

"Not yet, Mother. I'm certain she'll support whatever decision I make. She loves me."

"Be that as it may, I have a suggestion for you."

"What's your suggestion, Mother?"

"I am on the board of a local private high school near Princeton. I can recommend they hire you as a science instructor. It is a position where you can do little harm to what is left of your career. They will likely listen to me. You can live at home and earn a salary while you search for a new position."

"What about Penny, Mother?"

"There is a new Cheesecake Factory opening nearby. She can find employment there and help out around the house with light housekeeping duties."

"That's very nice of you, Mother. Thank you."

"I suggest you plan to be here as soon as possible. I have a lecture tour commencing next week and would prefer you be settled prior to my departure."

"I'll start packing right away, Mother."


	50. Chapter 50

**50**

Penny drove to 2311 North Los Robles feeling good. Her wardrobe meeting at The SyFy Channel had gone well. The various clothing suggestions they made would make her look professional but hip. The paperwork she picked up included her contract, which had also been sent to her agent and a couple of scripts for films that SyFy would be produced the following summer that had roles she was being asked to consider. All in all, a pretty good day. Now came the tough part, the part she dreaded, dealing with Leonard.

Penny walked into the lobby and found Sheldon waiting for her.

"Hello, Penny."

"Sheldon, you're home from work pretty early."

"I've been calling you on your cell but you never picked up."

"Darn! I'm sorry, sweetie. I turned off my phone when I got to the SyFy offices. I didn't want to get interrupted. And Leonard's been calling and texting me for days. I forgot to turn it back on."

"I was hoping that I'd catch you before you went up to speak with Leonard."

"Why?"

"Leonard resigned his position at the university this afternoon."

"Shit. Have you spoken with him?"

"No. I don't believe anybody has. I wanted to make sure you knew what you were walking into and that you knew we were all across the hall for you if you need us."

"All?"

"Myself, Missy, Alex and Nora, Raj and Howard. Bernadette will be over after work."

"Wow. Thank you. Um, I don't know what to say."

"We understand that you need to speak with Leonard alone and that must be private. And I understand that you still intend to eventually marry him. Just remember that Leonard is not above using his situation to manipulate you into sympathizing with him, supporting him and agreeing to all his wishes whatever they may be. What happened at the university he did to himself. No matter how many others he blames for the events that led to his resignation he is ultimately responsible and it is not your responsibility to fix anything or make him feel better about his actions."

"I understand what you're saying, Sheldon. It's a lot to think about but I've been thinking about this for a while now. I don't think his resignation is going to change my mind about us taking our time and not living together."

"I'm glad."

"Listen, while I have you here, I picked up the contract for Wil's show. Please look at it while you have a chance."

"Of course. I'll peruse it and have my notes for you tomorrow."

"No big hurry. End of the week is fine."

"As I said, I'll have my notes for you tomorrow. We can review them over lunch."

"Okay, well, here goes."

And Penny headed upstairs alone, leaving Sheldon in the lobby.

_Next: Leonard and Penny_

_A/N: I know I've kept you on the edge of your seats for a few days now. Here's the deal. If y'all are real good and I get some work done on Chapters 53 and 54 and my internet connection holds up you'll see the next chapter later today. If not, then tomorrow. It's written and I'm pretty satisfied with it. I think you'll like it too. _


	51. Chapter 51

**51**

Penny took a deep breath as she was about to open the door to her apartment. She was prepared to find an angry, depressed fiancé demanding her support. She opened the door and was faced with a pile of closed cardboard boxes with more open ones spread throughout the apartment.

"Leonard?" she called.

Leonard came out of the bedroom wearing a big, pasted-on smile.

"What's going on?"

"We're moving."

"What?"

"I quit my job at the university. They weren't going to give me tenure so I quit."

"And you're moving?"

"We're moving. I spoke to my mother in New Jersey. After she finished yelling at me she said with her connections she can probably get me a temporary job teaching science in a local high school while I search for a more appropriate position at a university."

"You're kidding."

"Nope. Now, here's the thing. The job probably won't pay me as much as we're used to so you'll probably need to work. But guess what, there's a new Cheesecake Factory opening up nearby so it'll be just like here. And everything about the wedding can stay on track."

"Leonard, I have a job."

"Yeah, you're going to have to quit."

"Excuse me."

"I'm not comfortable with you working for Sheldon. He's a big part of why I'm not working there any more and I expect you to support me in that. And idiots run that university. Sooner or later they'll do something that makes you want to quit, too."

"Leonard, you're not telling me everything. This had something to do with that Joyce Kim and the rocket fuel didn't it?"

"No, the FBI ended their investigation. They couldn't prove a thing but Gabelhauser doesn't like me. He never did. And he said he'll make sure I never get tenure."

"So what does Sheldon have to do with any of this?"

"I'm pretty sure Sheldon ran to Gabelhauser and told him a story about me screwing up his Arctic research."

"But you _did_ screw up his Arctic research, Leonard."

"That was a long time ago, Penny. It doesn't matter. Nobody cares, just Sheldon."

"So you think that Sheldon made sure you'd never get tenure?"

"I do."

"I happen to know that he isn't the one that told Gabelhauser."

"Well if he didn't who did? It couldn't have been Howard or Raj. They're my friends."

"Yeah, well Howard and Raj are the ones who told Gabelhauser. And they were right to do it. It was a lousy thing to do. They should have said something a lot sooner. So should you."

"You weren't there, Penny. Sheldon was being ridiculous. It was unbearable."

"Gee, I'm starting to wonder why he even let you live with him after that."

"What are you saying, Penny? I expect you no, I demand you support me."

"Why?"

"Because we're in love and we're going to be married."

"And because of that I'm supposed to give up not just my job with Sheldon, which pays me more than I've ever made before in my life and has benefits, but I'm also supposed to walk away from the job with Wil Wheaton at SyFy that could really lead to a career that I've dreamed of doing something I'm good at. And I'm supposed to leave all my friends? I already did that once for you."

"And while you're doing all that what am I supposed to do, stay at home and keep house and take care of our kids?"

"What's wrong with that? It's what you expected _me_ to do, isn't it?"

"It's what you're supposed to do, Penny. I went to university. I trained to be a physicist. I worked hard to get where I am. You were just in the right place at the right time."

"So you're smarter than me? You're more important than me. Anything you do is better than anything I do?"

"Well, yeah. But we love each other so it doesn't matter. I'm going to take care of you."

"Yeah, you taking care of me got me clinically depressed and was turning me into a drunk."

"Neither of those things is true, Penny. You're just seeing the wrong therapist. This kind of thing happens all the time. You should have asked me to help you find a good therapist, even though I don't think you need one at all. I think you're just a little confused. And you're not a drunk. So we both like a little wine at night. It's not a problem. And it helps us enjoy other stuff a little more."

"Leonard, why do you have such a problem with me doing things for myself?"

"Penny, you have to admit that your track record of doing things for yourself isn't very good. Until we got together you dated nothing but jerks. You kept working at The Cheesecake Factory for years and could barely support yourself. Then you even quit that and decided to make that stupid gorilla movie and you couldn't even make that work. You need me. You can't make it without me."

"Excuse me, but right now you're the one without a job and I'm doing pretty well."

"That's only a temporary situation. You'll screw it up. It's your pattern. But it doesn't matter because I've got everything figured out."

"Leonard, where are we supposed to live while you find yourself and I'm working at The Cheesecake Factory?"

"We'll live with my mother. And, oh yeah, you might have to do some things around the house to help out."

"Wait a second! I'm supposed to keep house for your mother. Like a maid?"

"It's only temporary until I get another university position. It won't take that long. I'm a good catch."

"No. You're not."

"What are you saying?"

"Give me a minute."

"I want to know what you mean."

"_I SAID GIVE A MINUTE. ALRIGHT?"_

"Fine, no need to yell."

Penny walked to the kitchen. She turned her back to Leonard, took a glass and poured herself a glass of water. She took a sip. Then she turned around.

"Leonard, my intention when I opened up that door a little while ago was to tell you I need a little space, that maybe us living together wasn't such a good idea yet."

"_YOU WERE GOING TO THROW ME OUT?"_

"Please let me finish, Leonard. I wasn't going to throw you out. I wasn't even going to break our engagement. I just wanted some space. You have this habit of using all the oxygen in the room, of assuming that everything has to be about you. Your career. Your lousy childhood. Your needs. "

"I'm sorry things aren't going well for you with work, Leonard. But you did those things to yourself and I can't fix them. I won't even try. Me being in your life isn't going to make those things better. I don't think I want that responsibility."

"Leonard, for years I've been what you wanted. From the moment you met me you got a picture of me in your head and you were willing to wait for me to become that picture. And when I lost everything but you I thought maybe I was ready to be that picture. And that's when I said I'd marry you."

"But Sheldon, he helped me to see what _I_ wanted, what I needed. And he didn't do it for himself. He did it for me. And that scares you. And it should scare you because what you want is for you, not for me. I don't think I want to be the Penny that gives you smart and beautiful children anymore."

"So, there's something going on between you and Sheldon…I knew it." Leonard spat out.

"There is nothing going on between me and Sheldon. He's my friend and I love him for that. And he's helping me figure out what I really want."

"I thought you wanted me."

"Yeah, I thought that too. But the Leonard I wanted was a nice guy. A sweet nerdy guy who loved me."

"I'm that guy. I'm still that guy."

"Leonard, I'm not sure you were ever that guy. You may think you love me, but really what you want is to have me. And to show me off. And to use me to help build that family that you think you want. But you don't know a damn thing about any of that. I may not be an expert in love and I may have dated a bunch of jerks but I'm finally reaching the conclusion that you are just another jerk, a better educated, more entitled jerk. And I'm finally done with jerks."

"Here's your ring. And you can keep that piece-of-shit car you gave me. The job at SyFy is going to pay me enough to get a new one and there'll still be a bunch left over. And I'm going to pay you back every cent you ever gave me. I don't want you to have any claim on me."

"So you are throwing me out."

"No, you can stay here as long as you want. Just not with me. I'm going to stay somewhere else until you're gone. And leave my stuff alone. I'll still be living here after that."

"You're making a big mistake, Penny."

"Maybe I am. But that's what I do. Right, Leonard? I make mistakes. I'm just a stupid hick from Nebraska who just goes through life making bad decisions, fucking the wrong guys and generally screwing up. And you decided you were the only one who could fix me. Well, you know what? It's not your job anymore. Try fixing yourself because you are way more fucked up than I am. I never sabotaged my best friend's heart's desire and made believe it never happened. You did that. And you have to live with that. Sheldon or Howard or Raj or Gabelhauser didn't screw up your career. You did that all by yourself. I've lived across the hall from you for almost eight years. I've watched Sheldon and Raj and even Howard try to become better people and pretty much succeed at it. But you, you made _me_ responsible for you being a better person. You decided that _I_ had to be a part of your life to make you better. And you know what? It didn't happen. You are selfish and you are entitled and you don't care about anyone but yourself. I may make some mistakes in the future. Hell, I probably will. But you, Leonard, you are a walking, talking mistake and you refuse to see that. Goodbye. Leave your key across the hall when you finally leave."

And Penny walked out the door to Apartment 4B and went straight across the hall, determined to not let Leonard see her cry.

_A/N: A late Friday (at least for me) gift, since I can't predict when my internet is going to crap out. BTW, I'd really love to top 600 reviews this weekend. After all, what better way to mark the end of Lenny Week than by showing Leonard the door. _


	52. Chapter 52

**52**

Penny walked over to Apartment 4A, opened the door, walked in, closed the door behind her, collapsed back against it and sank to the floor. Almost as one her gathered friends rose and started to approach her.

"I'm okay. I really am. I just need a minute."

"Sheldon. Tea." Missy called out as she approached Penny. "I'm not so sure y'all are as okay as you think you are, sweetie. You're pale as a ghost."

"Really, Missy. I'm okay. At least I will be."

"Take your time. Do you want to tell us what happened? I mean, only if you want to."

Sheldon approached and offered Penny a hand to help her up from the floor. "Would you like a seat? Please, take my spot."

"Thanks, Sheldon."

Sheldon helped Penny over to the sofa and then brought her a cup of peppermint tea. Penny took a breath and looked down at the floor. She took a sip of her tea, looked around at her gathered friends and began in a monotone voice.

"Leonard's moving back to New Jersey. Beverly's getting him a job teaching at a high school there and he's going to live at home while he looks for another university job."

"Are you going to New Jersey with Leonard, Penny?" asked Sheldon.

"He wanted me to. He thought I could help take care of Beverly's house and get a job at The Cheesecake Factory there."

"And?"

"I gave him a chance but he made a decision and he expected me to just go along with it. And… I just can't do it. I finally have a decent job and I might have a future and I have a life and I have friends and I can't walk away from it to just be Mrs. Leonard Hofstadter. It's not enough. He's not enough."

"Penny, what did you do?"

"I ended it. I gave Leonard his ring back. I told him to keep his stupid car and I told him that I'd pay him back every cent he ever gave me. I don't want any part of him in my life any more."

"Oh, sweetie." Missy sat down next to Penny as she began to sob.

"I can't believe I ever thought he was the answer for me. He's a selfish, stupid snob who just wants to show me off to his friends and have me as his personal fuck toy and baby factory. He doesn't care about _me_. He _never_ really cared about me. The only person Leonard has ever cared about is Leonard."

And then Penny pulled back the tears and straightened up.

"Sheldon, we need to talk. Excuse us everyone but there are some things I need to say and they're for Sheldon alone."

"Alright. Let's go speak in my bedroom."

"But nobody's allowed in your room, sweetie."

"The baby is asleep in Missy's room. Unless you wish to speak in the bathroom, which I believe would be wholly inappropriate, I hereby give you dispensation to enter my bedroom."

"Okay."

Penny and Sheldon slowly walked back to his bedroom.

"What the heck is that about?" asked Howard.

"Those two have always had a special connection," answered Raj.

"They've gotten even closer since Sheldon came back and Penny started working for him," added Missy.

Sheldon closed the door behind him and Penny sat down on his bed.

"Sit down next to me, Sheldon."

"Alright."

"I wanted to thank you."

"I don't understand."

"You always knew that Leonard and me were wrong."

"I. Leonard and I."

"Right. And you were never quiet about it. And I didn't listen."

"Actually, I thought it possible that on more than one occasion that you stayed with Leonard to spite me."

"Yeah, you might be right about that. But for the most part you stuck to your guns. And then I did one of the dumbest things I've ever done in my life."

"You'll have to be more specific Penny."

"I agreed to marry Leonard and pretty much chased you out of my life."

"That's not entirely correct, Penny. Your betrothal to Leonard and your potential cohabitation was but one of many factors that led to my departure."

"Okay, but when you came back you could have just ignored me and gone on about your new life with Missy and your nephew and your new research but you didn't do that. You moved forward with your life and you offered me a chance to move forward with you and I don't think I could have done what I just did without you doing that. I was pretty far down the road to living Leonard's life and you went and gave me my own."

"Penny, I merely opened a door for you. You chose to walk through it."

"For the first time in my life I have options and they don't hinge on being with a guy or satisfying someone else's image of me. I get to be Penny. Not Leonard's Penny or Kurt's Penny or Amy and Bernadette's Penny or even my parent's Penny. Just Penny. Me."

"That's all I wanted for you."

"No it's not."

"Excuse me."

"I overheard what you said Saturday night. I know how you feel about me."

"Penny, this isn't the time."

"You're right. I know. I need space. I need to not be with anyone for a while and make the life that I have now mean something. I really like working with you and Alex and I have every intention of making that work."

"And we have great confidence in you."

"Thank you. And I really want to work hard on the thing with Wil."

"Penny, I am certain that you will light up the television screen and it will only lead to better things for you."

"But here's the thing, Sheldon. You are my best friend in the world. And I have a pretty good feeling that somewhere down the road, when we're both ready for it we're going to be more than that."

"I'd like that very much."

"But for now we both have our own lives to put together. And that has to be our top priority. And we get to help each other do that. Sort of like partners. Everything else gets put on hold."

"I believe I can agree to that."

"Can I have one of those patented Sheldon hugs?"

"I don't see why not."

Penny and Sheldon stood up and put their arms around each other, pulling each other close when they heard a crash. And yelling. They looked at each other and said, "Leonard," opened the door and ran out to the living room.

_A/N: Sorry I skipped posting yesterday. I needed to take a breath after that last chapter. I hope you understand. So what's next? Well, Leonard isn't gone yet. And what the heck is going on with Amy Farrah Fowler? It's not like her to just disappear, is it?_

_And thank you all for helping me mark the end of Lenny Week in an appropriate manner. The sickeningly sweet tripe that's being posted to mark "the greatest love of all" has really stolen my fic-reading appetite. However, we barreled through 600 reviews and right now it looks like the top two current reviewed fics on this site are this one and Risknight's Bundle of Joy (read it if you aren't already), both either Shenny or Shenny-adjacent. That says something, doesn't it? Anyway, the next goal is 700._


	53. Chapter 53

**53**

Penny and Sheldon ran out to the living to find Leonard screaming at Nora.

"You bitch! I knew she had to be with somebody else. I figured it was one of her meathead exes or maybe even Sheldon. But I never thought it would be someone like you. Did you know about this Alex?"

"What the hell are you talking about, Leonard. And get your damn finger out of Nora's face."

"Alex, I can handle this myself, thank you," Nora calmly responded.

Nora grabbed Leonard's finger and bent it back until he screamed in pain and backed off. Then Leonard glared at Penny.

"How do you fucking explain the sketchbook I found hidden in the closet. You and that bitch cavorting around naked. How long has this been going on?"

"You're a fucking idiot Leonard. A jealous fucking idiot. And that sketchbook is mine."

"Explain."

"No. We aren't together any more. I don't have to explain anything. Are you planning to go through all my stuff and challenge me on every little thing you find based on every stupid jealous conclusion you jump to?"

"Why shouldn't I jump to conclusions? You're the one who broke our engagement for no reason."

"No reason? You're fucking kidding me. No reason. I took the time to explain it to you. I have no intention of going through it again. We are over. We will not be getting back together. I will not be going to New Jersey with you. I will not be having your smart, beautiful and imaginary children. I want nothing to do with you Leonard."

"You owe me a better explanation."

"No I don't. The only explanations I ever got from you were that you love me and you'd say anything to fuck me. You never explained why you fucked your best friend's research up. You never explained why you fucked Stephanie while she was Howard's date, or what you lied to Raj about fucking Priya, or tried to fool Sheldon about his slut bunny friend or why it seems every person on that North Sea boat saw me naked. How about you try explaining some of those things. And why is it that every time you fuck someone other than me it's because they made you do it. And you seem to think that you're some grand prize and that every woman wants to fuck you and they should just open their legs for your pitiful little cock and your unsatisfying lovemaking and beg for more."

"You seemed pretty satisfied."

"I felt so crappy about my life and I was so sloshed most of the time, thanks to you I might add, that even you looked good. Well, my eyes are open now and you are just not worth my time. You're not worth any woman's time."

"Oh yeah, I'm such a catch that when she realized she couldn't have me Alex became a dyke."

"What!"

At that Alex stood up, walked over to Leonard and kneed him in the groin. As he bent over in pain, Alex laughed and said "C'mon, Leonard, it can't hurt that much. According to Penny you're barely packing."

Sheldon decided it was time to take charge.

"Raj. Howard. Please escort Leonard from this apartment and from the building. Leonard, you are not wanted here and you've shown you cannot be trusted around Penny, her home or her property. We will pack your things. You may return tomorrow when you will find your things waiting for you in the lobby. Just go. Now."

"Where the hell am I supposed to stay?" Leonard whined.

"There are any number of cheap hotels and motels that are appropriate for someone of your ilk. Your continued presence here fouls my home."

"Come along, Howard. Let's get Leonard out of here. Sheldon, we'll return shortly to help with packing and moving Leonard's things downstairs," said Raj.

After Raj and Howard walked a shell-shocked Leonard out the door, Sheldon addressed his remaining friends.

"I apologize for committing you to this odious task without first asking your permission. I felt it necessary to remove Leonard from our presence before he did any more damage."

"Sheldon, it's okay. Nora and I are glad to help."

Penny brightened. "Sheldon, I'm gonna call around and get us some more help. I'm betting Zack'll be up for giving us a hand and maybe he can bring along a couple of friends to carry stuff downstairs for some beer and pizza. I'd call Kurt but he'd probably get the wrong idea."

"I'll make arrangements for our locks to be changed first thing tomorrow. I suspect one of us will need to take a day off from work."

"Sheldon, I'm not working tomorrow," volunteered Nora. "I'd be happy to hang out here and wait for the locksmith and when he's done I can come over to the campus and drop your new keys off with you. And if Leonard tries to come back I can show him what a pissed off dyke does to a guy she doesn't like."

"Nora that would be wonderful. Thank you."

"I'm also wondering what kinds of surprises we can add to his packed stuff, maybe grated cheese in all of his pockets?" offered Penny with a mischievous twinkle in her eye.

"Penny, you are evil," said Missy.

"I can be. Missy, while we start to get things organized across the hall, would you mind ordering a few pizzas and some beer. I'm paying. Packing up Leonard's crap and bringing it downstairs is probably going to take us all night."

Zack Johnson and a couple of his pals were there in less than an hour, which was helpful because Leonard's furniture was fairly heavy. Penny marveled at how quickly things went. Sheldon took command and organized how things needed to be packed. He was familiar with which things belonged to Leonard and which belonged to Penny. Penny decided that any items that she and Leonard purchased together went to Leonard. Sheldon thought they should be split but Penny said no.

"Sheldon, I don't care if I have to buy a bunch of stuff. I really don't. I'll be happier without a trace of Leonard left in here. I even want my stupid box of Leonard memories gone. I get to make a new start. I have a relatively new job, another new job starting soon. I'll have a new car. Pretty soon I'll even go out and treat myself to some new shoes."

Nora came back in after a trip downstairs with a box of Leonard's medications. There were still four more boxes of meds left.

"Hey, Penny. Why don't you figure out which of Stuart's sketches you want framed? I know a guy who'll do it for cost. I can drop them off tomorrow on my way to campus and you could probably have them back in a week. I'm thinking you might want to hang them now."

"Great idea, Nora, especially since they made a little contribution to getting Leonard out the door. I know exactly where I want that last one to go. It's my favorite."

"I'm guessing you want it where that monstrosity that Amy gave you used to be."

"You got that right, Bernadette. Putting it up there kind of gives both Leonard and Amy a well-deserved kick in the ass."

_A/N: Sorry posting has slowed down a little. I did warn you that might happen._


	54. Chapter 54

**54**

The last of Leonard's things made it down to the lobby around 3:00am. Since that included the brown leather couch and the bed, which Penny refused to ever sleep in again, she slept at Alex and Nora's. The next morning as Alex went to work, Penny and Nora headed back over to 2311 North Los Robles. After doing a quick inspection of Apartment 4B they knocked on the door to 4A.

Missy opened the door.

"Hi sweetie. We were expectin' Nora but how come you aren't headed to work?"

"I just wanted to come over to make sure we got all Leonard's stuff out and help you guys get ready for work. We were all up pretty late last night and I figured that the baby might be cranky."

"Well, you know how he is when he hasn't had his REM sleep."

"I didn't mean Sheldon."

"Yeah, well he's been stompin' around all mornin'. He's still pretty pissed off at Leonard."

"Maybe I can calm him down."

"Well, you do kinda have that effect on him."

"He's in his room?"

"Yeah. You two want some oatmeal?"

"Sure, if there's enough. And coffee if you have some made."

"'Course I do."

Penny went back to Sheldon's room as Nora sat down for some breakfast. Sheldon's door was open. He was just sitting on his bed staring straight ahead.

"Sheldon sweetie, are you okay?"

"Oh, good morning Penny. I wasn't expecting to see you until I got to the office."

"I thought you guys could use a hand and Nora was coming over anyway."

"Yes, for the locksmith. He should arrive in about an hour. I gave him specific instructions as to the type of locks he is to install."

"Thanks. I'll repay you for that as soon as I get paid."

"Penny, don't concern yourself with that at the moment."

"Yeah, and about that, can you sit down with me sometime later and help me figure out how much I actually owe Leonard?"

"Certainly, though I don't believe you should have made that offer to him."

"Sheldon, I really don't like the idea that Leonard would think I owe him something because of all the money he spent on me, especially over the past few months. It makes me feel cheap."

"Penny, though you didn't intend to sell yourself to Leonard, nor would you, I am quite certain that Leonard did not expend those funds out of the goodness of his heart. I believe he was quite certain he _was_ purchasing you."

"I'd rather not even think that even if it is true."

"In any case, I would be happy to help you determine a fair total. But first we will review the SyFy contract proposal you gave me over lunch today."

"Sheldon, how could you possibly have found time to look at that with everything we did yesterday?"

"Between the time you gave it to me and the time you came over from your apartment and burst into tears I was able to glean enough and make appropriate notes and suggestions."

"Okay, fine. But first let's get ourselves together and head in to work."

"Alright. I wouldn't want you to be late because of me. That would not be a good example to set."

They gathered their things, the baby and his things and went to work. Though tired after a long night of packing, once they got to the office they found Alex already there and hard at work still following up the work she'd done on Sunday. Sheldon headed into his office to go over notes for a coming paper and Penny sat down at her desk reviewing the upcoming calendar and making sure that Sheldon and Alex were prepared for the rest of the week. Missy brought the baby to childcare and began her own day.

Around mid-morning Penny got a call on her cell. She saw it was the landlord so she answered the phone.

"Hello."

"Is this Ms. Queen?"

"It is."

"This is Ms. White from the 2311 North Los Robles Corporation, your landlord."

"Hi. What can I do for you?"

"We'd like to know exactly when you'd be moving out. We have another tenant lined up for your apartment."

"Excuse me? I have a lease and I know my rent has been paid. I don't understand."

"We received a call from a Dr. Leonard Hofstadter this morning. He claimed to be your fiancé and roommate and he informed us that you were moving to Princeton, New Jersey imminently. The building manager reported that your things are being picked up from the lobby this morning. Dr. Hofstadter was also kind enough to recommend a new tenant who is able to move in immediately, a Dr. Fowler. If you have already moved out we would like to inspect and paint the apartment and prepare it for Dr. Fowler. She is due in this afternoon to sign a new lease."

"Um, I'm gonna have to get back to you in a few minutes, okay?"

Penny got up from her desk and immediately ran into Sheldon's office.

"Sheldon, you are not going to believe what my creep of an ex-fiancé did."

"Penny, there are any number of possibilities."

"He called the landlord this morning and told them we were moving out and recommended that Amy take over my apartment."

"That is unacceptable. Leonard does not have that right. You didn't add him to your lease, did you?"

"No. I had the paperwork but you know how Leonard is with paperwork. Everything else comes first. He never even bothered adding me to his medical plan."

"Penny, I'll take care of this. It's fortuitous we are having the locks changed."

Sheldon picked up the phone and called Ms. White, a woman he knew to be terrified of speaking with him.

"2311 North Los Robles Corporation. Ms. White speaking."

"Ms. White, this is Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

"Dr. Cooper, you promisd that all of our communications would take place via email or letter. You said that you wouldn't call."

"Excuse me, Ms. White, but I promised that I would not use the phone as long as the corporation did nothing that perturbed me. You have done something that perturbs me and I wish it to be addressed immediately."

"Dr. Cooper, I promise that we have done nothing."

"Did you accept a call from a Dr. Leonard Hofstadter claiming that he and Ms. Penelope Queen would be vacating apartment 4B?"

"Well, yes."

"Is Dr. Hofstadter a signatory to the lease on apartment 4B?"

"Well, no. But he said he was Ms. Queen's fiancé."

"And that gives him property rights?"

"Um, no."

"But you assumed that he spoke for Ms. Queen without ever checking with Ms. Queen. You immediately assumed she would be moving and made arrangements to rent her long-time abode out from under her in violation of her lease, did you not?"

"But he said he had a new tenant lined up who could move in right away and Ms. Queen has always had a spotty record in paying her rent on time."

"Ms. Queen is currently employed by me at CalTech and also by the SyFy Channel and I can guarantee you that she is quite capable of paying her rent now and in the future. The potential tenant Dr. Hofstadter recommended, however, is currently under investigation by a government agency, as is Dr. Hofstadter."

"Oh, my."

"You might also like to know that my own investigation has revealed that Dr. Hofstadter was responsible for the destruction of the building's elevator ten years ago. Isn't it about time you repaired it?"

"Dr. Cooper, I'll need to look into that."

"Please do that. Now, I assume Ms. Queen will be hearing no more about moving out?"

"No, not at all. There might be a problem though."

"And that is…"

"Dr. Fowler said she would be going over there this morning to inspect the apartment. The building manager is meeting her with the key."

"Thought it is truly none of your concern, Ms. Queen ended her engagement to Dr. Hofstadter yesterday evening and demanded that he leave the building. As a security precaution I suggested that she change her locks, which is being done as we speak. The building manager will be unable to enter Apartment 4B. She will provide him with a new key this evening."

"Then Dr. Fowler…"

"…will need to find another place to live."

_At 2311 North Los Robles_

The locks for Apartments 4A and 4B had both been changed and Nora was about to leave for CalTech, when there was a knock at the door. Nora found Amy Farrah Fowler there with a scowl on her face.

"Excuse me, but what are you doing in Sheldon Cooper's apartment?"

"I was doing Sheldon a favor. Now excuse me but I'm on my way to see him now."

"I wish to employ Sheldon's spare key in order to enter apartment 4B."

"Um, no."

"The building manager seems to have the wrong key. It does not work. I know for certain that there is a spare key available in this apartment."

"Even if there is, you have no right to go into Penny's apartment."

"You are misinformed. Penny is moving to New Jersey with her fiancé. The apartment is now mine."

"Yeah, I think you're the one who is misinformed. Penny lives there. Leonard is on his way to New Jersey."

"Where I presume Penny will be joining him in advance of their coming nuptials. Despite our recent tiff I still fully expect to be her Maid of Honor."

"Lady, no joining. No nuptials. No Maid. And definitely no honor. I suggest you go elsewhere and buy a clue because you clearly have no idea what's going on around here."

"I am a renowned neurobiologist. I know a great deal more than you will ever know. Please accede to my wishes immediately."

"Boy, I have dealt with you just twice and the only thing that I know is that you are some kind of serious dingbat. I'm leaving now. So are you. If you don't I'll be calling the cops. Then I'll call Sheldon and Penny. But no matter what you'll end up out on the street on your ass. And I believe you are still owed an interesting trip down the stairs."

Amy Farrah Fowler immediately turned and ran down the stairs.


	55. Chapter 55

**55**

_Back at CalTech a bit later_

"Good morning. Dr. Cooper's office. This is Penny."

"Good morning, Penny. Why are you still there?"

"Um, who is this?"

"Amy Farrah Fowler."

"Sorry, Amy. It's not a very good connection."

"I was forced to purchase a temporary phone when the lab demanded I turn in the one they gave me."

"Okay, Amy. So what do you want? I have standing instructions from Sheldon to not put your calls through."

"I wish to know when you will be joining Leonard in New Jersey. I went over to 2311 North Los Robles to inspect your old apartment and that harridan friend of Alex Jensen's would not grant me access. And what was she doing in Sheldon's apartment in any case?"

"That's none of your business, Amy. And I don't know where you got the idea that you're moving into my apartment. It's not happening."

"Leonard informed me of your impending move to New Jersey late yesterday evening. Perhaps I misunderstood. Will you be joining him at a later time? In that case I would be happy to be your temporary roommate until your departure. I foresee us having lots of girlie fun in advance of your nuptials. I understand that some brides take part in sexual experimentation prior to devoting themselves to their husbands. I would be available for that if you so desire. In any case we would be able to better plan your pre-wedding festivities if we cohabitate temporarily."

"Oh God, where do I start? Okay. Leonard is moving to New Jersey. I am not. We are not getting married. Ever. I will be perfectly happy if I never see him again. I am not moving out. You are not moving in."

"Penny, I have known you for a number of years. You and Leonard have had a tiff. But you love him and he loves you and you are destined to be together. I suggest you find him and apologize for this mix-up and then we can shop for my new Maid of Honor dress."

"No mix-up, Amy. And you and Leonard are delusional if you really believe that I'm going to wake up and realize I made a mistake and go running to New Jersey to start pumping out lactose intolerant babies. It's not gonna happen. Ever. I finally have a pretty good life coming together and Leonard really hates that. He especially hates that it's happening while his life is falling apart."

"Is it not your duty as his future bride to stand by Leonard in times of difficulty? He stood by you while you were jobless and had no hope for the future. He even agreed to marry you. It was all quite romantic."

"No Amy. It was not. Leonard didn't _want_ me working. He was afraid that I might meet other people. Discover other things. Maybe be successful. And maybe fall in love with someone else. He wanted me all to himself. And he wanted to show me off like a trophy."

"Well, of course he would, who wouldn't he? Your luminous beauty reflects on anyone at your side."

"Stop it, Amy. When you say things like that it just sounds creepy."

"There must be a logical explanation for your actions. Have you fallen in love with someone else? Is it that woman Nora? She seemed to act quite possessively when I encountered her. Leonard inferred that there might have been a dalliance. I always hoped that if you decided to experiment with Sapphic tendencies you would come to me."

"Damn it, Amy. Stop going there. I am not attracted to you. I'm not even sure I like you as a friend any more. And Nora, unlike you, has been supportive of the decisions I'm making because they make sense for me, not because of what they might mean for her. That's what real friendship is about. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm at work and it is inappropriate for me to continue this conversation now."

"Perhaps we can convene later over dinner. Perhaps at The Cheesecake Factory."

"I don't think so Amy. I don't think I want to see or talk to you at all. And let me give you some advice. Stop scheming with Leonard or on your own to get things back to how they were. It's not going to happen. I'm moving on. Sheldon is moving on. And we're very happy with how our lives are now going. You and Leonard are just anchors dragging us down and I really don't appreciate you showing up every couple of days with another plan to make my life and Sheldon's life over in your image. From what I understand your life is kind of in the crapper because of things you yourself did. And so is Leonard's. Both of you would be better off working on yourselves instead of trying to make me and Sheldon responsible for your well-being."

"I don't see how you are in any position to offer advice of any kind."

"Hey, you called me. I'd be perfectly satisfied if we never spoke or saw each other again. You and Leonard are toxic. Goodbye, Amy. And good luck."

And Penny hung up.

"Hey Sheldon, let's go to lunch and review that contract. Alex, you come too. I'll call Nora and have her meet us over there."

_A/N: I was asked whether Missy's baby in this story has a name. I've always been uncomfortable naming existing nameless characters. The baby hasn't been named on the show, so he's not here either. In another one of my stories Penny's mom was a major character. I never used her first name. You might say "But you gave Penny a last name and on the show she doesn't have one." True. But that's actually a serious issue I have with the show. Penny's lack of a last name diminishes her as a person and implies that she will never really be a person until she has Leonard's last name. Virtually every other character on the show has a first and last name. Not Penny. It's not funny. It's not right. So I have gone along with what seems to have become a TBBT fanfic convention and given her the last name of Queen. I don't know who first came up with that. I know it wasn't me. But it works, because for me and in my stories Penny is a fully realized person and not an appendage who depends upon another person for her legitimacy. And now I will step off my soapbox._


	56. Chapter 56

**56**

_At the Humanities Cafeteria_

"Penny, are you certain you wish to review your finances with Alex and Nora present?"

"Alex and Nora are my friends. We've talked about a lot of it over the past few days. I'm perfectly comfortable with them knowing exactly how big an idiot I've been."

"Penny, you have not been an idiot. You are in exactly the position that Leonard desired you to be in. You are indebt to him and he believed that would ensure your bond. He was mistaken."

"Yeah, I was stupid. He was mistaken. Can we get on with this?"

"Alright. To what extent has Leonard been paying your bills?"

"Okay. He started helping with the rent after I quit working at The Cheesecake Factory. At first it was only a little because I was getting some unemployment and I got paid, but not a lot, for the gorilla movie but by the time you left he was paying for pretty much everything. But he moved in with me in August so for August and September I only owe half.

"My best estimate would be that the rent you owe him for that period comes to approximately $4500-5000. Does that sound about right?

"Let's say $4750."

"Alright. What about utilities?

"I was pretty much able to cover that except for the last couple of months."

"Since you were cohabitating during that period let's say, $250."

"Okay. Now the car. He wouldn't tell me how much he paid for it but he implied it was a lot so probably $2,000."

"I happen to know he purchased that car from a student for $550."

"You're shitting me. You would not believe how many times he brought buying that car up in bed and what he got from me for it."

"I'd prefer not hearing those details, Penny, but I am not at all surprised. That car was hardly worth a handshake. And though your former automotive transport constantly tasked me with it's 'Check Engine" light it had a great deal of personality and it said Penny to me. The car Leonard gave you only said 'Purchased by Leonard.' You are better off rid of it."

"Are there any other expenses Leonard covered?"

"I guess food."

"Penny, I long ago accepted the reality that paying for your food is the cost of knowing you. There should be no reimbursement."

"Thank you, I think."

"Alex, Nora, have you anything to contribute to this discussion."

"Yeah, Penny, I still think you're an idiot to do this."

"Nora, we talked about this. If Leonard is going to act like he's been acting, like a douche, then I want to make sure he no longer has anything he can hold over me."

"Sweetie, the money doesn't matter. He's an ass. He's gonna act like one. Lucky for you pretty soon he'll be doing it from 3,000 miles away."

"Yeah, any idea when he's actually leaving. 'Cause I think he's gonna keep pulling crap like he did with the apartment until he leaves."

"Well, supposedly he has to be in Jersey by Sunday because Beverly's leaving for a lecture tour on Monday and she wants him there before she leaves. So I'm guessing he'll leave as late as he can, probably Sunday morning."

"So that means three more days of his shenanigans."

"Yup."

"I will endeavor to find a way to encourage him to leave as soon as possible. In the meantime, the total we have reached is $5,550, which matches what I previously estimated it would be. Here."

Sheldon handed Penny a check for $5,550.

"Sheldon, what is this?"

"I am loaning you the funds so that you can end this business with Leonard as quickly as possible. I prefer that he not have a reason for further contact with you. I know you will pay me back when you can."

"Wow. Thank you Sheldon. I don't know if I can let you do this. And I already owe you money for the other day. Boy, was _Victoria's Secret_ bad idea. And I still have to buy a new bed."

"Penny, you can and you will accept the loan. If you leave the door open in any way Leonard will attempt to come through. I can't permit that. You deserve an opportunity to live the life you want. I am able to help you financially. In any case, Leonard will not have the money very long."

"Excuse me?"

"Our landlord is now aware that Leonard was responsible for the destruction of the elevator at 2311 North Los Robles. I suspect the corporation will attempt to collect compensation for that. I provided them with Beverly's address."

"Sheldon, that wasn't very nice."

"I wasn't aware that I was to be kind to Leonard. And I don't intend to be. We have covered up this particular misdeed of his for almost ten years. I believe it's time he paid a price."

"So, Penny, since you don't have a bed yet I guess you'll be camping out with us a bit longer."

"Yeah, I guess I should have asked."

"We invited you, sweetie. You can stay as long as you like. You just need to remember the clothing optional rules."

"Nora!"

"Excuse me!"

"Sheldon, you don't need to know what happens at Alex and Nora's place."

_Next: Sheldon receives an unexpected visit. A secret is revealed. A favor is requested._


	57. Chapter 57

**57**

Shortly after they returned to the office from lunch Penny looked up from her desk to see a couple of unexpected visitors.

"Is Dr. Cooper in?"

"Just a minute. Let me check."

Penny nervously got up from her desk and went back to Sheldon's office, knocked on the door and went in.

"Yes, Penny."

"Sheldon, those guys from the FBI are back and they want to see you."

"Well, I have done nothing to be overly concerned about. Please bring them back."

"Are you sure?"

"Penny, I suspect not speaking with them will be far more troublesome than speaking with them."

"Okay."

Penny went back out and motioned for the two agents to follow her. She led them back to Sheldon's office.

"Would you like some water or something?"

"We're fine, thank you."

"Penny, please close the door behind you. Hello, gentlemen. What can I do for you?"

"First, Dr. Cooper, we'd like to thank you."

"For what?"

"Dr. Cooper, you're a pretty smart guy. We think you know exactly what."

"Please enlighten me."

"Dr. Cooper, we've done a pretty thorough investigation, two investigations in fact. We just spent three days with Joyce Kim. We know."

"What do you know?"

"We know that as soon as Joyce Kim left North Korea you began an anonymous email communication with her, encouraging her to come forward and reveal what she knew about North Korean Intelligence, specifically their activities in the academic and research communities. You led her to believe that she could trade this knowledge for a possible publishing deal or employment."

"Can you prove that?"

"If we wanted to take the time we could. Suffice it to say that we believe you performed a service. The knowledge we've gathered from Ms. Kim in just three days has been invaluable. We will be taking very good care of her. We can guarantee that. And through our investigation we have been able to deal with the Dr. Hofstadter problem, perhaps not as well as we would have preferred, but it is quite unlikely he will ever enjoy the kind of access that he once did. Your country is grateful."

"May I ask a question?"

"Certainly."

"With Dr. Hofstadter's history with explosives, do you think it wise that he be permitted to fly?"

"What are you getting at, Dr. Cooper?"

"Dr. Hofstadter has been harassing my assistant, his former fiancé. He is scheduled to depart for Princeton, New Jersey on Sunday. However, each day he remains he makes it more and more difficult for her. This morning he attempted to rent her apartment out from under her assuming that she would have no choice but to move east with him, something she very definitely does not wish to do. I suspect he will next attempt to undermine her employment here and elsewhere. If he were forced to depart earlier, that might circumvent any further schemes he could have."

"We can't make him leave, Dr. Cooper."

"If he had to take another slower but to my mind superior form of transportation, he would be forced to depart sooner."

"Are you suggest we put him on the _'No-Fly List'_ so he has to take the train?"

"I believe that would be _your_ suggestion."

"We could possibly arrange that. However, we would appreciate a bit of _quid pro quo_."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Setting aside the Kim/Hofstadter situation which you may or may not have brought back to our attention, you certainly _did_ bring the Faisal/Fowler situation to us. If you hadn't mentioned it during our interview we would not have started asking questions, which we did. We were able to quickly discover a network of financial support for terrorists and terror supporters and sympathizers. We have been able to shut down most of it in a very short period of time."

"Congratulations, but I was merely providing Dr. Fowler's financing as an example of foreign funding of domestic research. I had no idea there was anything unsavory going on."

"Be that as it may, Dr. Cooper, we believe that Dr. Fowler may be in danger and we have recommended that she and her mother take advantage of the Witness Protection Program."

"I suspect Dr. Fowler reacted negatively."

"She did. She maintains that it would interfere with her research, which is currently unsponsored and unfunded, and hinder her eventual engagement and marriage to you."

"I have no intention of ever asking for Dr. Fowler's hand in marriage."

"She has told us that the only way she will enter Witness Protection is if you accompany her."

"I will not."

"We thought that would be your reaction. Therein lies the favor we would ask of you. We need you to help us convince Dr. Fowler that she must enter the program and accept the possibility that she will never see you again."

"I have been trying to convince her that we have no future as a couple since my return to Pasadena. She seems quite unwilling to accept that reality. Just this morning she attempted to rent my assistant's apartment so that she would be in closer proximity to me. I was able to nip that plan in the bud."

"We are asking you to try one more time. The longer she remains as she is the more danger she and any who are near to her will be in. Faisal's associates are quite angry that their funds have been cut off and since Dr. Fowler was the funnel through which that funding came…"

"I understand. Could you not simply arrest her?"

"We could. We prefer not to. There might be publicity generated that would hamper our future anti-terrorism efforts."

"I see. Well, I suppose that I'm willing to make the attempt. Though recent experience tells me that Amy Farrah Fowler only hears what she wants to hear."

"Would you be able to do that now? We've been keeping an eye on her and know that she is currently at her mother's home."

"Fine, but I prefer that you accompany me so that answers to any questions are readily available."

"We can do that."

"Alright. Let's go."

Sheldon got up from his desk and walked out of the office with the FBI agents following.

"Penny, I'm going with these for a short time. Nothing to be concerned about. What are your plans for this evening?"

"Well, Alex, Nora and I were just going to hang out in the apartment. We were thinking of inviting Missy over. I don't think Missy's gone out for anything except work or grocery shopping since she got here. Are you going to be home in time to babysit?"

"That's very nice of you. Come to think of it Missy has been home with the baby most of the time. An evening out with friends would likely do her some good. I expect that I will be home in time to take care of the baby this evening. I trust you will not be endeavoring to corrupt Missy in any way."

"Sheldon, none of us are drinking these days. What could we possibly do?"

"A certain sketchbook and Nora's penchant for stirring up trouble comes to mind."

"Trust me, Sheldon, we will not corrupt your sister. Besides, chances are she could teach us a few things."

"Alright, but it sounds as though I should have a few words with Missy."

_Next: A visit with the Fowlers._


	58. Chapter 58

**58**

The black Escalade pulled up in front of the plain little house. Sheldon and the agents got out and approached the front door.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Fowlers._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Fowlers._

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Fowlers._

Amy Farrah Fowler opened the door.

"Hello Sheldon. I knew it was only a matter of time until you returned to me. Why are these men with you?"

"Amy. We need to talk. These men can provide pertinent information to which you must pay attention."

"I have heard what they have to say. I find their statements are without basis and are not relevant to my needs and purposes."

"Be that as it may, you have involved me in your rationale for not taking heed of their advice and I cannot allow you to do that. May we come in and sit?"

"Alright. But I am expecting a call at any moment asking me to return to my lab and continue my work."

Sheldon looked at the two agents. They nodded negatively.

"Would you gentlemen like some Strawberry Quick? From the powder."

"No thank you."

"Dr. Fowler, we can assure you that the phone call you are waiting for will never come. Are you aware of what has transpired at the lab since you were asked to leave?"

"I am certain they have had to explain to a great many people why they stopped working with such an eminent neurobiologist as myself."

"Dr. Fowler, they have had to explain to a great many people why they accepted funding from someone who also supported terrorists. The administrator who brought you in has resigned. Much of the funding for other scientists working there has been curtailed. It is quite likely the lab will go out of business in a matter of weeks."

"I don't understand."

"Dr. Fowler, you aided and abetted very dangerous people."

"I was doing Faisal a favor. A series of favors."

"Those favors may have cost people their lives."

"I am not responsible for that. I'm a neurobiologist, not a politician. Science does not recognize borders or politics. It is about knowledge."

"Excuse me, Amy, but even I know that's poppycock. The sciences, especially at universities, are rife with political implications. Much of the funding for the research done at CalTech comes from the Defense Department. Do you actually believe we work with rocket fuels to develop mass transit? That our laser research is about improving CD and DVD players? Though my own work is theoretical I am well aware that it could be adapted for use in weapons development. I'd prefer that it not be but I will not sit by ignorant of the possibilities. Though your own research may be benign, the behavioral sciences have been used to positive and negative effect in managing various populations and groups."

"I work with monkeys, Sheldon."

"Why?"

"Because they are primates, like humans."

"And you truly can't see your research being extrapolated to include human beings and forcing them to behave in certain ways. Amy, you've done it to me."

"That was only to help you overcome behaviors that are not helpful to you."

"In your opinion."

"Well, I am the neurobiologist after all."

"Be that as it may, you cannot divorce science from the world about us. To do so would show either great _naïveté_ or an ignorance of reality."

"I disagree. Knowledge can be pure."

"In any case, our philosophical discourse aside, you have angered some very dangerous people."

"Why?"

"Dr. Fowler, you were the source of their funding. Through tracking the funds you distributed we were able to arrest a great many people."

"So you have eliminated the problem. Leave me alone."

"We have not arrested everyone. We have no idea how far this network stretches."

"Why don't you ask Faisal?"

"He has not exactly been communicative since we froze his accounts."

"I for one can understand that. I'd prefer not speaking to you myself."

"Dr. Fowler, your fiancé is a murderer. He has financially supported the killing of children and women and men all over the world. We can prove it."

"I don't believe you. I know Faisal."

"Dr. Cooper, do you understand now what we've been contending with?"

"I believe that I do. Amy, you are endangering yourself, your mother and your friends by not taking the advice these men have given to you and going into the Witness Protection Program."

"Sheldon, if I enter that program I will no longer be permitted to be a scientist."

"Dr. Fowler, at this moment the only person who would probably be willing to hire you is your fiancé, Faisal. And, to be honest, if you even attempt to go to work for him we will arrest you for treason."

"Sheldon, I will consider entering the program if you come with me."

"No. Categorically no."

"So you are unwilling to give up your work but you believe that I should."

"Amy Farrah Fowler, I do not have blood on my hands. You do whether or not you believe it. These men are offering you an opportunity to live out your life in safety. Please do not use this as yet another method to extend a relationship that I now believe should have ended long ago. I do not love you, Amy. I will never love you. And your recent conspiring with Leonard Hofstadter has proven to me that I cannot trust you. You need to make a decision for yourself alone. But please know this, because of the danger you represent, if you do not enter the program I will take legal measures to ensure that you cannot come anywhere near me _or_ my friends."

At that moment Amy's mother entered the room.

"Amy, who are these gentlemen?"

"Of course you remember Sheldon. And these other men are from the government."

"Sheldon, how nice to see you again. Amy tells me that we can expect a big event very soon."

"Excuse me?"

"Amy tells me that you two expect to be married within the year."

"Mother, I told you that in confidence."

"I don't understand. Are you implying that you are keeping your upcoming wedding secret from your fiancé?"

"I am not Amy's fiancé."

"Well, I haven't really kept up with what young people call things these days but I assume that since you and my daughter have been having intimate relations for several years now that a marriage and children can be expected."

"Excuse me. A few years ago, in order to curtail your request that Amy date regularly, as a favor I conspired with her to convince you that we were having sexual relations. It embarrasses me to admit that was a lie. Amy Farrah Fowler and I have never done anything more than occasionally kiss and hold hands. And, to be quite honest, I found both terribly uncomfortable but you must realize that your daughter can be quite demanding."

"I must admit to being alarmed by the falsehood you told me but I am happy that your relationship has progressed in such a wholesome way. I assume you prefer to have relations after you are married."

"Ma'am, once again, I apologize. Amy and I will not be getting married. We are no longer involved in a relationship though she seems quite hesitant to accept that reality. For the time being I am devoted to my work and my family. As time passes I hope to once more bond with another person but I am sorry to say that person will not be your daughter."

"Then why are you here if not to pursue your relationship with my daughter?"

"I am here at the request of the FBI to attempt to convince Amy and yourself to enter the Witness Protection Program for your own safety and that of everyone you know. Amy's relationship with a man from Saudi Arabia, Faisal, a sponsor of terrorism to whom she _is_ engaged to be married, has placed us all in danger and Amy refuses to accept that."

"Amy, is this true?"

"In order to guarantee the funding for my research I agreed to become engaged to Faisal. It was merely a business agreement and I had no intention of following through. The government has claimed that Faisal has done horrible things. I am unwilling to believe them. If Faisal were dangerous I would know. We have met and spoken on many occasions."

"Amy, is it possible that you are mistaken about this Faisal person and that these gentlemen are correct?"

"Mother, I am much smarter than these gentlemen. I see no reason to listen to anything they say."

"And how much do you know about this terrorism business?"

"I am aware that it exists. I have nothing to do with it."

"Dr. Fowler, we have been very patient with you. Kind, in fact. We realize that you were an unwitting accomplice…"

"Excuse me! How dare you accuse me of being unwitting? I have been called brilliant."

"Amy, dear…"

"Yes, mother."

"Shut up and let the man finish."

"Thank you, ma'am. Dr. Fowler, you were an unwitting accomplice and because of that we have allowed you certain latitude. However, as we have told you previously, we are legally able to arrest you and put you away for a very long time. And, believe me, not being able to play with your monkeys will be the least of your worries should that happen."

"Are you threatening me?"

"We are promising you. You have two options. Enter the program or go to jail. Sitting here waiting for a phone call that will never come is not an option available to you. We can assure you that you will be receiving no legitimate offers of employment. You can either enter the program by yourself and never see or contact anyone you now know ever again or your mother may enter the program with you. Your options are quite limited and you have until tomorrow morning to make a choice. And, trust me, while hiring an attorney may aid you in crafting a slightly more beneficial agreement with us it will not prevent anything from happening. We will return tomorrow morning for your answer. Until then a car will remain outside. Flight is not an option. And we strongly suggest you not contact the media. We have a great deal of evidence showing the results of Faisal's sponsorship. If the public is able to associate you with that evidence we cannot guarantee your safety."

"Sheldon, you will let them do this?"

"I will, Amy. I cherish the time we had together and will remember you fondly. But I absolutely accept the likelihood that I will never see you again and am quite prepared to move on. I advise you do the same. And now, I will take my leave. Gentlemen, I will wait outside while you complete your business. Goodbye, Amy Farrah Fowler. Mrs. Fowler. Fare well."

Amy attempted to approach Sheldon for a more intimate farewell, hoping it could change his mind, but he just turned, went to the front door, opened it and left without even looking back.


	59. Chapter 59

**59**

_Meanwhile, back at the office_

Penny dialed Missy over at the Humanities Cafeteria.

"Humanities Café. Missy Cooper speakin'."

"Hi sweetie. How are you doing today?"

"Doin' okay, Penny. What's up?"

"Alex, Nora and I were thinking of having a little Girl's Night thingie tonight and we were wondering if you'd like to join us. Sheldon said he'd babysit."

"Wow. Get out and be with some folks who don't dribble and burp and treat me like a walkin' talkin' meal? Sounds great!"

"Well, I can't promise about the dribbling and burping. But yeah, we're adults. Sort of."

"I'm in. What time?"

"Work it out with Sheldon. And he can give you the address. We should all be home after 7."

The FBI agents dropped Sheldon off at 2311 North Los Robles at about 4:30. He knew he had enough time to organize his evening. Before they dropped him off they assured him that they had done him the favor he requested. Leonard Hofstadter was now on the 'No Fly List' and it would take a great deal of time and effort to remove him. Sheldon chuckled. An hour later Missy and the baby were home.

"Shelly, did you really tell Penny you'd take care o' the baby tonight."

"I did. You've been kept very busy by the various events going on around here and you've not complained at all. You deserve a bit of down time. You've been working very hard at your new job, taken excellent care of your son and of me I might add. And you have provided support to Penny in her time of need. You deserve a bit of time for yourself. In fact, we should try to work things out so that you have some time to yourself on a regular basis."

"Now how are we gonna do that, Shelly?"

"Perhaps we should seek out a babysitter to come in on a regular basis. Or I could do it. Or perhaps our friends can aid us. It's just a thought. We don't need to do anything about it now. Please just give me the baby and get on about preparing yourself for an evening out. I have already prepared his dinner and I have some work to do once he gets to sleep. I promise that I will not get so involved in my work that I won't hear him if he is in distress. And I will remain awake until you come home."

"Sheldon, that's silly. Why don't we just move the baby's crib to your room for tonight? That way you can go to bed whenever you want and I don't need to be concerned with wakin' anyone up when I come home. I know that if the baby cries you'll take care of him. I trust you."

"Alright."

"Okay. I'm gonna take me a shower and then get dressed and head over to Alex and Nora's. Y'all think I should bring anything?"

"Well, typically there was a great deal of wine consumed at these gatherings. However, I suspect that will not be the case tonight. Perhaps dessert would be appropriate. I recall that there is a very nice bakery between here and there. Perhaps an assortment of pastries?"

"Great idea. Could you put the info in my phone while I'm in the shower, Shelly."

"I can."

A short time later Missy was showered, refreshed and ready to leave.

"The information is all in your phone. Just turn on your GPS program and it will guide you to the bakery and then to Alex and Nora's. A favor please?"

"Sure."

"Please purchase some cannoli for me? I have a bit of a hankering."

"Will do. If the baby gives you any trouble I'm only a phone call away."

"I doubt I'll need to call but thank you. Please enjoy yourself and convey my greetings to Alex, Nora and Penny."

"Good night, Sheldon."

"Good night, Missy."

Missy had no trouble finding the bakery, picked out a nice selection of pastries and a separate box of cannoli for Sheldon and some cupcakes for herself. She arrived at Alex and Nora's building at 7:15 and knocked at their door a few minutes later. Alex answered.

"Hi Missy. Welcome to our home. Please excuse the mess."

"Um, Alex, this is not a mess. I've been to Leonard and Penny's place."

"Hey!" Penny interjected.

"C'mon, sweetie, that place was a pigsty."

"Okay, you're right. I know I can be a little messy but most of that was Leonard."

"Fine. We believe you. But once you move back home we'll be checking in and we'll see exactly how messy you are."

"I swear I'm even going to use Sheldon's organizational chart. If I'm going to be working two jobs I'll need to know where everything is. I'm just not gonna have time to look."

"Hey guys, where's Nora?"

"We made her get dressed."

"Excuse me."

"She likes to walk around with nothing on. I decided that it wasn't appropriate to walk around with nothing on when there's company coming," answered Alex.

Nora walked out of the bedroom wearing a pair of cutoffs and a Wonder Woman tank top.

"Is this good enough?"

"Fine, sweetie."

Missy looked around. "So are we doing dinner?"

"We ordered a couple of pizzas if that's okay. There's juice and soda in the fridge."

"Works for me."

They all sat down in the living room Penny sat down next to Missy.

"Missy, there's been so much going on about me and my bullshit I feel like I haven't really paid any attention to you. You're in a new city, with a new job and you're living with your brother, which isn't an easy thing in the best of times. How are you doing?"

"Actually, dealin' with all your crap has been a big help. Between that and the job and the baby I really haven't had any time to do much thinkin' at all."

"I'm sorry."

"No, sweetie, that's a good thing. Back home I was just feelin' sorry for myself. I had way too much time on my hands. That's one of the reasons I wanted to leave. Here I'm just really, really busy. And, trust me, my brother has been amazing. He's a surprise every day. A good surprise."

"How's the job?"

"I really like it. A lot of it is just organizing stuff like deliveries. All the booths take care of their own orderin' so I don't have that headache. And I decided we should try and take over the catering for the whole campus. When I found out that for Sheldon's tenure reception all they served was stale sponge cake and Kool Aid I knew I could do better. I put a proposal together and put it in and it got approved. I just stole all the Physics Cafeteria's catering business. My boss is pretty happy."

"The baby seems to be adjusting pretty well."

"He is. He likes the childcare folks and he likes when he stays with Sheldon and you guys."

"He's a good baby."

"Penny, when do you think you're comin' home?"

"I think maybe next week sometime unless these two throw me out before that. I still need to buy a new bed and I have to pay Sheldon back the advance he gave me last week and start paying him back the money he gave me for Leonard."

"You know my brother ain't in no hurry."

"I know, but I just feel like I'm taking advantage."

"You didn't ask him for that. He offered. And you know why."

"Yeah."

"Um, speaking of the lactose intolerant elephant in the room, an idea what he's up to now?"

"I don't know. After the bullshit he tried to pull with my apartment…"

"The sooner he's three thousand miles away the better."

"I know. I just can't believe what an idiot I was."

"Sweetie, he took advantage. His mother trained him really well. He saw you were in a weak position…"

"Which he helped put me in…"

"And he swooped in. And he kept you drunk half the time. So did that harpy Amy."

"I still kinda feel sorry for her."

"Don't you dare feel sorry for Miss Amy Farrah Fowler!"

"Missy?"

"That woman tore my brother down to nothin'. She made him think everything he did was worthless except for his science work and then she helped tear that down. She did the same thing to Shelly that Leonard did to you except without the liquor. Don't you feel sorry for that bitch. I just wish I could've torn her a new one."

"A little angry there, aren't you, Missy?" asked Nora.

"Y'all didn't see the state Shelly was in when his friends were done with him."

Penny started crying. "I'm so sorry, Missy. I should have seen it. I should have helped."

"Penny. Sweetie. You did the best thing you could have done. You told him to leave. It was the only thing he could do. Nothin' would have got fixed here. He would only have gotten worse. And besides, from what Shelly told me, y'all weren't in much better shape than he was."

"You're probably right about that."

"And remember, if Shelly didn't leave we all wouldn't be here now. I wouldn't be livin' here. You wouldn't have a job. Alex might not have a job. Nora would probably still be walkin' around with no clothes on but…"

There was knocking at the door.

"That's probably the pizza."

Penny got up. "I'll get it."

Penny opened the door.

"Leonard, what the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm not an idiot. I figured that if you weren't at the apartment you'd probably be with your new friends."

Alex, Nora and Missy got up and joined Penny at the door.

"What do you want, Leonard?"

"You know what Sheldon did? I'm sure he's the one. He got me put on the _No Fly List_. I was going to leave for New Jersey on Sunday but I found out my plane reservation was cancelled. I have to take the freaking train now. Three freaking days on the freaking train. And I have to leave tomorrow to get there before my mother leaves on her lecture tour."

"So what does that have to do with me?"

"You're coming with me."

"No I'm not. We've been through this. We're over Leonard."

"You're just having some kind of episode. That crazy ex-roommate of mine has sold you a bill of goods. As soon as I'm gone he's going to fire you and you'll be back to fucking meatheads."

"Leonard, why don't you just leave?"

"Not without you. I worked really hard to get you and I'm not letting you go. And besides, you're never going to be able to pay me the money you say you owe me so I'm going to be in your life for a very long time."

"Oh, really? Wait right here."

Penny grabbed her bag and pulled out her checkbook and wrote a check for the amount she had determined with Sheldon and handed it to Leonard.

"What's this?"

"That's what I owe you. Every cent."

"This barely covers the car I bought you."

"That's bullshit. Leonard. I know exactly what the car cost. And you got more than your money's worth."

"I don't care about the money or the car. You're coming to New Jersey."

Leonard grabbed Penny's arm.

"Let go of me, Leonard. You're hurting me."

"No. You're coming with me. Once we're settled in New Jersey you'll thank me. And then life can get back to normal."

Missy had heard enough.

"That's it!"

Missy moved past Penny, shoving Leonard in the chest and pushing him against the wall across the hall. Then she put her hand on his throat and slid him up the wall until his feet were dangling.

"I've heard enough bullshit comin' out of your whiny little mouth. Penny said you 'n' her are over. You're over. You are out of her life. You are out of my brother's life. You are out of all of our lives. Your schemin' and your bullshittin' and your manipulatin' and your blamin' everything that happens to you on everyone but yourself are over. Now get the hell out of here or I will hold you here until you black out, which won't be very long. Then I will drive you into the dessert, bury you up to your neck and leave you there. And y'know what? Nobody will ever ask where you went. Because nobody cares. You just ain't worth carin' about. Now blink your eyes twice if you're ready t'leave. And I suggest you not test me. And you'd better stop harassin' Penny. You try one more stupid trick and me, Alex and Nora will hold you down while Penny goes Junior Rodeo on your tiny little pecker."

Leonard blinked twice and Missy backed off. Alex and Nora moved in front of Penny. Leonard tried to speak but could only wheeze. He searched his pocket for his inhaler.

Alex spoke up. "Leonard, you have until the count of five before I call the police."

"One."

Leonard was still wheezing.

"Two."

He took a tentative step towards Penny and the others and Missy stepped directly in front of him.

"Three."

Leonard tried feinting to the right and going left but Missy just shoved him back toward the wall.

"Four."

Alex took her phone out.

"Five."

And then Leonard threw up all over Missy and ran for the stairs.


	60. Chapter 60

**60**

"Oh, Missy. I'm so sorry."

"It ain't nothin' guys. If anyone here is used to gettin' spit up on by a baby, it'd be me."

"C'mon. You need to get out of those smelly, disgusting clothes, sweetie," said Nora. "I'm sure I've got to have something you can change into."

Missy followed Nora to the bedroom while Alex paid for the pizza, which had finally arrived, and Penny got drinks, glasses and plates out. Suddenly Alex and Penny heard raucous laughter coming from the bedroom. They rushed in to find Nora rolling around on the bed laughing while Missy stood in the middle of the room in her bra and panties.

"What's so funny?"

"I just pointed out that y'all were complainin' about Nora walkin' around naked with company comin' and here I am, the company, about to be standin' around in my altogether. Nora thought it was pretty funny."

"I'm counting this as a win for Team Nora."

"Fine, sweetie, but it took a little troll with a weak constitution for you to get the win. And I doubt that'll be happening again soon."

"And besides, it isn't like Missy is gonna spend the evening walking around the apartment naked like you do Nora. I'm pretty sure she's gonna put some clothes on. You are gonna put some clothes on, aren't you, Missy?"

"As long as y'all have somethin' that fits. I'm a little bigger up top than you gals."

"Actually I think I still have that Flash t-shirt that Sheldon loaned me."

"Penny, that was almost two weeks ago. I figured you would have given it back to him by now."

"Well, like he said, I stretched it out in odd places. Besides, I like it. It smells kinda like Sheldon. Sweet and comfortable."

"What are you sayin' Penny? Are you sweet on my brother?"

"Kinda."

"You gonna say somethin' to him?"

"He knows."

"Wait a second. What exactly is going on?"

"Looks like Sheldon bein' sweet on Penny isn't a one-way street."

"Hold on. There is nothing going on between me and Sheldon… right now."

"So there's gonna be?"

"I don't know…maybe. We talked a little about it. We aren't ready. I need time. We both need some time."

Nora and Alex looked at each other.

"Ya think?"

"Yeah. Neither one of us should be jumping into another relationship right now. We have a lot of other stuff going on. Stuff we should really be paying attention to. Sheldon needs to figure out things at work and Alex and me are going to help him with that if we can. And I'm going to see if I can have a career doing something I've wanted to do for a long time."

"Another thing, Sheldon and I were both pretty messed up by Amy and Leonard. It's gonna be a while until they're out of our systems. We owe it to ourselves and each other to go into our next relationship, whether it's with each other or with other people, poison-free."

Missy turned her back to the girls, took off her vomit-soaked bra and put Sheldon's Flash shirt on.

"Missy, I think that shirt's big enough to work for now. And I can take your stuff down to the laundry room and start it washing while we eat our dinner," offered Alex.

"That'd be great. I'm okay walkin' around here like this but I'm not sure I want to go out wearin' nothin' but a t-shirt."

"Sweetie, you've been in California for a while now. There are people walking around in a lot less."

"Yeah, but they ain't me. I may not be as uptight as Momma, but I ain't comfortable walkin' around almost naked outside. At least I ain't yet. Though if I spend any more time around Nora she'll probably have me takin' my clothes off in front of her artist friends just like Penny."

"Um, getting back to what got us here, what are we going to do about my ass of an ex? It's obvious he's not planning to let any of this go. Should we call Sheldon?"

"An' what would you tell my brother? Hey Shelly, my ex tried to drag me all the way to New Jersey and after Missy stopped him he threw up on her? What would that do except get Shelly angry when he can't do nothin' about it."

"Penny, I think Missy's probably right. Let's have some dinner and try to enjoy ourselves and if we have to do something about Leonard tomorrow we will."

Alex went downstairs to the building laundry room to put Missy's clothes in the washer and came back up to join the others for dinner.

"Penny, when do things start up with the Wil Wheaton thing?"

"Not for a while. But they want me to go to the conventions with Wil and promote stuff. There will probably be a couple of photo shoots and I'll probably do a couple of field reports."

"Sounds like fun."

"Yeah. I'm gonna see if I can get them to cover a plus one so maybe you guys can come along on a couple, one at a time of course. There's nothing local happening for a while."

"That sounds cool. Maybe I'll be able to do some cosplay."

Alex sarcastically responded "Um, cosplay for Nora is still walking around almost naked. She just wears body makeup."

"Alex!"

Missy was intrigued.

"Really, Nora. Aren't you nervous with all them fanboys around?"

"It's about the attitude, Missy. They're a lot more scared of me than I am of them."

"Still, not all of 'em are scared fanboys."

"I've been doing this for a long time. I haven't had a problem yet but I'm careful. Remember, I also bartend. I can see trouble coming. And usually I get out of the way but I can handle myself. I'm a lot stronger than I look. I would never put myself out there like that if I couldn't handle myself. Usually I meet a lot of interesting and fun people."

"And you probably had more than a little fun with them, right?"

"I'm not ashamed of what I've done in the past, Penny. Yeah, I had a lot of fun. Just like I'm sure you did and Missy did and Alex did. None of us are virgins."

"Sorry, Nora. I didn't mean to hit a nerve."

"You didn't. Not really. I admit I've done my share of sleeping around. I like to believe I'm past that because what Alex and I have is real and lasting. But I'm not going to pretend the things I used to do never happened. Some of those memories can come in pretty handy. Right, Alex?"

Alex blushed.

"So is this the point of the evenin' where we compare all our old exes?"

"Yeah, uh, no I think I'd rather skip that. I think we spent more than enough time with one of my exes tonight."

"Seems to me like Nora probably has the best stories but I'm with Penny. Let's skip it."

"Okay, another time. And trust me, I do have some pretty good stories."

"The guys keep saying _What happens at ComicCon stays at ComicCon_."

"Penny, I suspect those guys haven't had the same kinds of experiences I've had. If they did they'd never shut up about them. As a for instance, can you imagine what any of them would do at an orgy?"

"Run away?"

"Probably. But we said we weren't going to talk about this stuff tonight. But some other time…"

"Fine Nora. Now do me a favor and go down and put Missy's stuff in the dryer?"

"Okay, sweetie. Be right back."

As soon as Nora left Alex turned to Missy and Penny.

"I'm sorry if Nora got a little personal. She kind of likes to find people's buttons and push them."

"Nothin' t'apologize for. I like folks that are blunt and know who they are. Nora is both of them things. You're lucky. You'll always know where you stand with her."

"Thanks, Missy."

"Yeah, I guess I could learn a little from Nora. Instead of being embarrassed and ashamed of the stupid things I did and guys that I did I should just accept it all as part of who I am and move on."

"It's a lot easier said than done. Penny."

"Y'know, it's weird and a kinda nice hanging out with people who sort of have the same level of experience as me. It was different hanging of with Bernadette and Amy."

"Assumin' you mean sexual experience, sweetie."

"Yeah."

Nora came back into the apartment and saw the serious expressions on everyone's faces.

"Who died?"

"It's not like that. Penny was just mentioning that this group, us, we're all kind of sexually active and have been for a while. That wasn't really the case with her, Bernadette and Amy."

"Yeah, we were Amy's first female friends and she didn't know how to handle that. She didn't know what questions were inappropriate and she was constantly coming on to me in this innocent but totally creepy way."

"Do you think she might be gay?"

"I think she's just completely confused and she got this idea in her head that she has to be with Sheldon…or me…probably because we're the only ones who have ever shown her any affection at all."

"That's not a good reason to get into a relationship."

"She just doesn't understand and she's learning everything she knows from the Jane Austen novels she reads and us."

"Not a great idea."

"No. No it's not. And we've seen the results. But for someone who is supposedly pretty intelligent, Amy doesn't seem to want to learn. She's just like Leonard. She just figures that over time she'll wear Sheldon down. And Leonard came pretty close with me. If it hadn't been for Sheldon…"

"That ain't gonna happen to Shelly. Not if I have anything to say about it."

"I think Sheldon is doing just fine, Missy."

"I'll be a lot happier when Amy and Leonard are both out of his life for good and things can get more settled. Like Penny bein' home where she belongs."

"C'mon Missy. Alex and Nora have been great. They've made me really feel at home here."

"I didn't mean it like that. Y'all shouldn't have to avoid bein' in your own home. It's wrong."

"It's almost over. Right now it's mainly because there's nowhere for me to sleep there. As soon as that changes I'll be home and we can start rotating these little get-togethers."

"Got a question about that."

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you include Bernadette in this thing tonight? I know she's your friend, probably for longer than any of us."

"Yeah. I know. Here's the thing. I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. She has a lot more in common with Amy than I do and the two of them have been hanging out together a lot. In some ways they really click more than Amy and I do. Since stuff is still going on and I figured that the Amy thing would probably come up, I didn't want to put Bernie in the position of having to defend Amy. Even if she doesn't agree with what Amy's been doing she might not be comfortable with us ragging on her."

"Yeah, I guess I get that."

"Next time around I will invite Bernie. But I don't think Amy will ever really be welcome again. After what she did with the apartment and what she said to me I don't really think of her as a friend."

"Missy, I'm going down to get your stuff."

"Yeah, it's gettin' late. I have a suspicion that Shelly is waitin' up even though I told him not to. And tomorrow is a school day."


	61. Chapter 61

**61**

When Missy got home she found the lights out and everything was quiet. She showered, changed for bed and tiptoed into Sheldon's bedroom to get the baby, bring him out to the living room, feed him and then replaced him in his crib in Sheldon's bedroom. Missy then went to bed and had a very restful sleep, so restful that she almost overslept. Sheldon and Missy rushed around in the morning in order to leave for work on time. It wasn't until they were driving to CalTech that they had a chance to talk.

"I trust you had a nice time yesterday evening."

"Mostly yes. I coulda done without Leonard throwin' up all over me though."

"Excuse me?"

"Leonard figured out where Penny was stayin' and decided to come by and try to drag her all the way to New Jersey."

"I suspect Penny did not take that well."

"No, she didn't. And neither did Alex, Nora or me. I am sick and tired of that troll actin' like Penny is his possession and expectin' her to follow him a round like a little puppy."

"Leonard's expectations of Penny do not include her thinking for herself. What happened?"

"I happened. I kinda blew a gasket, backed him up against the wall and threatened to drive him out to the desert, bury him up to his neck and leave him there."

"You got physical with him?"

"A little bit."

"And the vomiting?"

"After I let him go and we threatened to call the cops."

"I trust you discarded or laundered the clothing."

"All done before I ever came home."

"We need to be wary of Leonard until he finally departs. And now that you have had a physical confrontation…"

"What is he going to do, Shelly, tell on me?"

"Most likely. Who he tells is the question."

When Sheldon arrived at the office he found Penny and Alex were already there at work.

"Good morning. I understand there was some homunculus-themed excitement at last-evening's get-together."

"Sheldon, what am I going to do? Leonard refuses to accept reality."

"Penny, I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but I suspect you may have to seek a legal remedy. You may have to involve the authorities."

"I was really hoping I wouldn't have to do that. I was hoping Leonard would take the hint and go away."

"Penny, you have done far more than hint that your relationship with Leonard is no more. You have stated it in front of witnesses on multiple occasions. I believe that Leonard has determined that he prefers to reside in a land of delusion."

"What do I do, Sheldon?"

"I suggest you speak with Howard Wolowitz and see whether his legion of attorney relatives includes an appropriate person to advise you on this matter. I intend to at some point have another conversation with Beverly. She needs to know what exactly she will be residing with."

"Okay, I'll give Howard a call when I get a chance. Where's the baby? Isn't this one of his days with us?"

"Missy and I were running a bit late this morning and she preferred to have him nearby today since she was not with him yesterday evening."

A short time later Sheldon's office phone rang.

"Good morning. Dr. Cooper's office. Penny speaking."

"Penny, it's Missy. Y'all need to come get the baby." Missy sounded panicky.

"Missy, what's wrong?"

"I'm bein' arrested. Your asshole of an ex filed assault charges against me. The cops are takin' me to the Pasadena Police Station. Tell Sheldon. My car keys are in my office, top drawer of my desk. I gotta go."

Penny ran into Sheldon's office, where he speaking with Dr. Gabelhauser.

"Excuse me for interrupting but Sheldon, we have to go. It's an emergency."

"Penny, what's wrong?"

"Leonard got Missy arrested. We need to get the baby."

"Dr. Gabelhauser, I apologize but…"

"No need, Dr. Cooper. Family trumps all. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help."

"Thank you."

"Sheldon, I'll go get Missy's car. You get the baby."

"Alright."

Once Sheldon had collected the baby and Penny picked him up in Missy's car he started making calls on his cell. He started with Howard Wolowitz.

"Hi, Sheldon."

"Howard, I require a favor."

"What's up?"

"Leonard had my sister Missy arrested for assaulting him."

"And I missed it. Damn."

"Missy requires an attorney at the Pasadena Police Station."

"I'll call my cousins and get someone down there as soon as possible."

"Thank you, Howard."

"Anything else?"

"I'm not certain."

"I'll meet you at the station and I'll bring Raj along."

"Alright. We'll see you there."

Sheldon's second call was to Beverly Hofstadter.

"Hello, Sheldon. Once again you've called outside our standard contact parameters."

"Leonard has had my sister arrested."

"Excuse me?"

"I thought my statement was rather concise and to the point."

"Perhaps a bit more detail is required. I was under the impression that Leonard and his fiancé, Penny, were on their way to New Jersey."

"Beverly, I'm not certain as to Leonard's location but Penny is sitting next to me at the moment and I am quite certain she has no intention of relocating to New Jersey or for that matter marrying your son."

Penny called over from the driver's seat. "Hi Beverly. Sheldon's right. And at the moment I kinda wish your son would just disappear off the face of the earth."

"Sheldon, can you please explain what is going on."

"After we last spoke, Leonard started packing the apartment assuming that Penny would accompany him to New Jersey. As she is currently employed as my assistant and is concurrently engaged by the SyFy Network she demurred."

"Leonard told me Penny was currently unemployed."

"Penny's employment status changed a few weeks ago. She is not only gainfully employed, she is likely earning more than Leonard was earning when last he was employed. And her future is quite promising, unlike Leonard's. In any case, Leonard was unwilling to accept Penny's decision and she chose to withdraw from their engagement."

"I don't blame her. She seems to be in the process of turning her life around. I would encourage her to continue."

"Unfortunately your son does not agree. He has been undermining her every effort. He attempted to rent her apartment out from under her and yesterday evening he attempted to physically drag her away from a group of friends. My sister stopped him and as a result she is now incarcerated."

"Sheldon, I'm not certain what I can do from here."

"I believe that I can handle matters here. However, I suggest you be prepared to take measures there when Leonard arrives. His mental state is quite confused and I am concerned for Penny's safety."

"Are you suggesting I have him institutionalized?"

"You are the professional, Beverly. I suggest you examine him upon his arrival and reach your own conclusions."

"I will take your suggestion under advisement."

"That is all I can ask. I will speak to you again at our regular time."

"Goodbye, Sheldon."

"Sheldon, what are you going to do?"

"I am going to attempt to remove Leonard from California as soon as possible."

Sheldon's next call was to the FBI.


	62. Chapter 62

_A/N: First, my apologies for keeping you hanging. I'm having an Internet access problem and I'm not sure how soon it will be resolved. Unfortunately it has also distracted me from writing. I only have a little more to go with this story and some of it is already written but it will probably take a bit longer than I'd prefer to get it to you. Please bear with me. I haven't even been able to read my email for three days._

**62**

By the time they arrived at the Pasadena Police Station, Penny could tell that Sheldon was very angry.

"Sheldon, sweetie, you can't go in there angry."

"Penny, I understand what you are saying, but I cannot allow Leonard Hofstadter to continue inserting himself into our lives leaving havoc in his wake. It is unacceptable and it will stop."

"I agree. And we will do something about it. But getting angry with the police won't solve anything. And chances are it'll land you in a jail cell. Remember the last time?"

Sheldon recalled battling a traffic ticket and winding up sharing a jail cell with a variety of miscreants.

"But, Penny, Missy is in jail."

"And I'm sure Howard's cousin will get her out as soon as he or she gets here. That's their job."

"I understand but I feel so helpless."

"Sheldon, you are not helpless and you know it. You are one of the most self-assured and capable men I have ever met. You are going to solve the mysteries of the universe. Remember, just a few months ago your entire world fell apart and look at where you are now. Your life is better than it was in every way and you even took the time to make my life better, and Alex's and Missy's too. Don't let Leonard provoke you into doing something stupid. That's what he wants. You're better than that. And you're more devious than that. Let's get Missy out of jail and go home and figure this all out."

"Alright. Besides, I'm not certain I can actually do very much while carrying the baby."

"And that's why the baby will be staying with you. Look over there. Howard and Raj are speaking to someone. That must be Howard's cousin."

Penny got out of the car and helped Sheldon put on the Baby Bjorn with the baby. They walked over to Raj, Howard and the stranger.

"Hi guys. This is my cousin Dina. She'll take care of getting Missy out."

"Hi, Dr. Cooper. Howard caught me up on what happened. This will be pretty straightforward. There will be a quick hearing. Sometimes they dismiss these things right away. It's more likely they'll set a trial date and set bail. We'll give them a check. Hopefully once I know all the facts I'll be able to make this go away before it ever makes it to trial."

"What do I need to do?"

"Just be quiet and let me do all of the talking. I understand that your sister has no criminal record…"

"I believe there may be some speeding tickets in Texas."

"That shouldn't be an issue. Your sister is gainfully employed, a single mother."

"And the troll she supposedly assaulted had just assaulted our friend Penny."

"As I said, Dr, Cooper, this is just a hearing. Those other facts will only come out if there is a trial."

Suddenly Sheldon saw Leonard Hofstadter in his corduroy suit walking down the street toward the police station with a big smile on his face. He walked right up to them.

"So, it looks like Sheldon Cooper doesn't have the upper hand any more. You know how to make this all go away, don't you Penny?"

Penny was about to say something when Dina Wolowitz stopped her.

"Excuse me, Mr. Hofstadter is it, I would prefer you not speak to my clients. And I would strongly advise that they not make any _ex officio_ arrangements with _you_. I believe this complaint will be settled on its own merits at the appropriate time. And, Mr. Hofstadter, that time will be of our choosing, not yours."

"It's Dr. Hofstadter. And I am the injured party." Leonard pouted.

Dina Wolowitz led the group away, leaving Leonard on his own. They went into the station and went down a number of labyrinthine hallways to a hearing room. Luckily Dina had been there before and knew where the almost hidden hearing room was located. They found Missy there waiting for them. They sat down and waited for their turn in front of the judge, who surprisingly was the very same one Sheldon had dealt with before in his traffic mishap.

"Are you aright, Missy? Have you been treated appropriately?"

"I'm fine Sheldon. Everyone's been real nice. They told me they get these nuisance complaints all the time but they have to follow up. The police really don't like it when they think someone is wastin' their time and that's exactly what they think Leonard is doin'."

Missy's name was called. Dina joined her in front of the judge, pointed to Sheldon with the baby and her various friends. They talked for a minute. The judge mumbled something to the bailiff. "Ms. Cooper is released on $100 bond. Please be here for trial next month if this matter is not settled or dismissed before that, which I strongly suggest happens. By the way, where is the complainant?"

Leonard, who had just wandered into the room after nobody in the station would tell him where it, was walked up to the judge.

"I'm Dr. Leonard Hofstadter. I'm the one who was attacked."

"Really, Mr. Hofstadter, this young lady attacked you? For no reason?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Where did this attack take place?"

"Outside her friends' apartment."

"Where you were a guest?"

"Not exactly."

"Dr. Hofstadter, were you invited to be at that location?"

"Not exactly. But my fiancé was there so I had the right to be there."

"Ex-fiancé!" Penny called out.

"Dr. Hofstadter, this is beginning to sound less like assault and more like harassment. I'm not a big fan of men harassing women."

"We are engaged. We just had a little misunderstanding. I was trying to fix things."

"Dr. Hofstadter, I suggest you shut up. Trial will be in four weeks unless you choose to drop the charges."

"But I'm moving across the country. I can't afford to come back here for a trial."

"Then I suggest you engage an attorney and work out an agreement."

"But that's going to cost me money I don't have. I'm currently unemployed."

"I'm starting to see why your former fiancé made the decision she did."

"Judge, that is an inappropriate thing to say to someone who was assaulted. I demand to see your supervisor."

"Fine. He's on vacation at the moment. He'll be back in two weeks. Knowing his calendar I suspect you'll be able to get an appointment in six to eight weeks. Here's his number."

The judge handed Leonard a business card.

"I don't understand why you are making it so hard for me to get justice."

"Dr. Hofstadter, I'm not at all certain justice is what you're talking about."

"I demand that Missy Cooper go to jail for assaulting me."

"And that determination will be made at trial."

"A trial that will be very inconvenient and expensive for me to participate in."

"Welcome to the justice system, Dr. Hofstadter. Have you any further complaints?"

"Yes. I demand that you recuse yourself from the case because you obviously have no intention of hearing my side."

"An interesting proposal. My answer is no. You already have my supervisor's number. You can add that to your complaint. And I might point out that you are perilously close to being in contempt of this court."

"That's a joke. Just like you."

"I'm going to give you a chance to apologize."

"For what? Your inability to do the right thing?"

"Bailiff, please escort Mr., no, Dr. Hofstadter to a cell until he sees fit to apologize to this court."

Sheldon enjoyed watching the judge at work when he wasn't the one arguing with him. He didn't want to leave the courtroom until he saw Leonard led off to a jail cell.

"Penny, Leonard believed that by threatening Missy's freedom he would convince you to accompany him to New Jersey and a life by his side. Please promise me that no matter what he does you will not go with him. Whatever plot he hatches we will defeat. I promise you that."

"I know, Sheldon. I'm sorry that Leonard feels so strongly that he has to get what he wants. And I'm sorry that he's decided that what he wants is me. But just because he wants me doesn't mean he gets me. Leonard has turned his life into a pile of shit and there is no way that I'm jumping into that pile just because he wants me to. I just wish he would leave already."

Once Dina was through with the necessary paper work she came over to speak with Penny.

"Listen, I don't have all of the details, but it seems to me that you need an Order of Protection, Penny. That'll stop Leonard from coming near you or contacting you. The only reason that Missy ended up in jail was because she got between you and Leonard. Anyone else who comes between you two will likely end up dealing with him too."

"I was hoping to avoid stuff like this but if you think this is best I'll go along with it. But first I'm going to try to talk some sense to Leonard one last time."

"Would you like me to come with you?"

"I guess."


	63. Chapter 63

_A/N: Okay, so it's not a very long chapter but I'm trying to get back into my writing groove so I can finish this story. We don't have far to go. In the meantime I would just love to go over 1,000 reviews. Think of how much it would piss some people, better left unmentioned, off._

**63**

Penny and Dina went downstairs to where the holding cells were located. They found a very sour Leonard standing away from the others in the cell.

"So, you finally decided to apologize."

"I have nothing to apologize for, Leonard. You're the one who's been acting like a jerk."

"Well, I had plans for us and you screwed them all up for no good reason."

"Leonard, I want you to stop lashing out at my friends and at me. You made a mess of your life and it isn't our job to fix it."

"You're supposed to love me. You're supposed to be supportive. You're supposed to want to be with me."

"Except I don't love you. Not anymore. Especially not if you keep pulling the kind of crap you've been pulling. It has to stop."

"Then come with me."

"No, Leonard. I have a life here. I finally have a decent job and an opportunity to make something of myself. Penny Queen is finally going to move her life forward on her own."

"You'd have a pretty good life with me."

"No, I wouldn't, because it would be the life you want and I'm not even sure it would even be that anymore. You're going to be a high school teacher living with your mother. I don't want any part of that."

"It's only temporary. I'm a well-respected physicist."

"You_ were_ a well-respected physicist. You blew that. I need you to stop coming after me. We have no future together."

"I refuse to believe that and I will keep trying until you agree to come with me."

"I thought you had to be in New Jersey right away."

"I intend to speak to my mother and tell her that I need to stay here a little longer for you. So we can get married and be together forever."

"You aren't listening to what I'm saying at all are you?"

"I don't need to listen to you, Penny. I know what's in your heart. I know you love me. You told me."

"Yeah, it looks like nothing I say is going to help here. Goodbye Leonard. Please don't bother me or my friends again."

Penny left the holding area with Dina.

"I tried. He's not going to stop. Do whatever you need to do to keep him away from us, Dina."

A short time later, after they brought Missy back home and everyone was eating pizza and playing video games. Penny slipped across the hall to make a phone call.

"Hello, Beverly. This is Penny."

"Ah, my ex-future daughter-in-law."

"Yeah. Sorry about that."

"What can I do for you, Penny?"

"Something needs to happen with Leonard."

"I don't understand. I expect him here before Sunday."

"I just spoke to him a little while ago. He has no intention of leaving Pasadena without me."

"Well, my son believes he is in love."

"Your son is obsessed. He is making life here hell for me and for my friends. I think he needs help. Professional help."

"I'm not sure you're qualified to make that determination."

"Beverly, I ended our engagement when Leonard assumed that I would quit my well-paying job and walk away from the biggest professional opportunity I've ever had to go back to being a waitress in New Jersey. And since then he has tried to rent my apartment out from under me and physically assaulted my friends and me. At this very moment he is sitting in a jail cell because he refused to listen to a judge. This is going to get worse, not better."

"Beverly, I am taking legal measures to keep Leonard away from me and I'm walking away. Leonard has already alienated most of his friends. I want nothing to do with him ever again. And I'm starting to believe that ever getting involved with him was a huge mistake. I suggest you do something because I suspect having a son in jail will not reflect well on you and your reputation. Trust me, I know a little about that."

"I will take it under advisement."

"You do that. Goodbye Beverly. And good luck."


	64. Chapter 64

**64**

When Leonard saw what passed for food in the Pasadena jail and realized that his dietary restrictions meant he would be able to eat next to nothing he decided to apologize to the judge. When he was released he made a phone call.

"Hello Mother."

"Hello Leonard. I understand things are not exactly as you've described them."

"Who told you that? Sheldon?"

"I've spoken with Sheldon and Penny and also a very forthcoming judge and Penny and Missy's attorney."

"So?"

"Leonard you are wasting your time waiting for Penny to reconcile with you. She has no intention of ever doing that."

"I just need to convince her the right way."

"Leonard, listen to me. I've spoken with the young lady. She currently regrets ever knowing you."

"That'll change."

"No. It won't. Do you understand what you look like at this moment?"

"I look like a man who won't give up on the love of his life."

"No, Leonard. You look like a delusional soul who can't face reality and is making life miserable for someone he is obsessed with."

"I disagree."

"Leonard, who exactly is the psychiatrist here?"

"I don't care, Mother. I'm staying for Penny and that's it."

"Then I suspect you should be prepared to spend more time behind bars because Penny is taking legal action to stop you from coming anywhere near her or her friends."

"I'm pretty sure I can get around that. Penny would never do anything to hurt me."

"Leonard, I'll be quite honest, if Penny were put in a position where she had to do you physical harm to protect herself from your advances, I believe she would be able and justified."

"Thank you for your support, Mother."

"If you aren't here by next week to begin work that opportunity will evaporate. There will not be another."

"I can find my own job, Mother."

"Leonard, I've attempted to get you to be reasonable. What happens next is your own responsibility. Goodbye."

As Leonard was putting his phone in his pocket a black Escalade rolled up.

"Get in, Dr. Hofstadter."

"Where are you taking me?"

"You'll find out soon."

"This is kidnapping."

"No, actually it's not."

"What is it then? You forced me into this car…"

"We invited you. You didn't have to get in."

"I didn't get the impression I had an option."

"Oh, you had an option, Dr. Hofstadter. It wasn't a pleasant option, but it was still an option."

After a while the car pulled up to Union Station in Los Angeles.

"Dr. Hofstadter, your train leaves in ten minutes. That rather large gentleman over there will be your traveling companion all the way to New Jersey. We suggest you not try to get away from him. He has orders to do whatever is necessary."

"You said I had an option."

"You do, Dr. Hofstadter. You have the option to either get on the train under your own power or be put on the train. But, rest assured, you will be on that train when it leaves. Additionally, you will sign these documents. Every one of them. Right now."

"This one says that I'm dropping all charges against Missy Cooper. I refuse."

"Dr. Hofstadter, please understand something. We are not making a request. You will sign the document. You will leave the area. You will not return. We can make your coming hunt for employment difficult or impossible. We are fairly sure you'd prefer just difficult."

"So Sheldon Cooper is pulling your strings, isn't he?"

"We admit that Dr. Cooper has been very helpful to us. However, though he did ask us to do something about you, this particular favor is not for him."

"Who then?"

"You'll find her on the other end of your journey."

"My mother! My mother told you to do this?"

"Your mother has advised us on many projects for a number of years. She even suggested that we might have to get a doctor and drug you to get you on the train. That is still an option."

"Fine, but the world will hear about this."

"Dr. Hofstadter, worse things have been said about us. And _we_ have never taken top secret rocket fuel in order to fuck a North Korean spy."

"You can't prove that."

"Don't need to. Once the story gets around, and it's already started to get around, you'll be lucky to be teaching anywhere. At all."

"So I'm just supposed to disappear."

"That's what everyone here would prefer."

"Even my fiancé."

"Especially your EX-fiancé. The poor girl deserves a chance at her own success without an anchor like you dragging her down. Now get on the damn train."

"No."

Leonard started to walk away. The very large gentleman moved very quickly for a very large gentleman. He grabbed Leonard's upper arm and held it tight.

"Ouch! That hurts. Let me go."

"You're going in the wrong direction, Dr. Hofstadter. The train is the other way."

"I'm not getting on the train. Haven't you ever been in love?"

"That poor girl doesn't belong to you, Dr. Hofstadter. And you are never going to bother her again."

"You don't have the right."

The very large gentleman signaled to his compatriots who, in turn, signaled to a woman standing nearby.

Leonard's eyes lit up. His eyebrows cocked. He recognized the woman approaching.

"Stephanie. You'll help me get away from these assholes. Won't you?"

"Sorry, Leonard. I don't work for you. I don't even like you very much. So when Sheldon asked if I could help the FBI get you out of town I jumped at the opportunity."

The very large gentleman held Leonard as Dr. Stephanie Barnett prepared an injection and quickly stuck it in Leonard's arm.

"You broke up with me via text message. I'm dumping your ass for Sheldon with a hypo filled with the strongest sedative I could get my hands on. Sweet dreams, Leonard."

Leonard Hofstadter woke up two days later in a New Jersey hospital wearing restraints.

"So, Leonard, how are you doing today?" asked Beverly Hofstadter.

"Get me out of here. You have no right to keep me here, Mother."

"Actually, Leonard, among the documents you signed was your Power of Attorney, which I now hold. You will stay in this institution until you resolve the issues that got you to harass Penny and abuse your former friends. I suspect it will take some time. Possibly years."

_Next: Penny is curious. Sheldon tries to explain_

_A/N: Back just as soon as I can._


	65. Chapter 65

_A/N: I'm able to give you a couple of chapters today. I hope to finish this story over the next few days, barring any more RL interference. Sorry to leave you hanging._

**65**

_The next day_

"Hello Sheldon."

"Hello Beverly."

"I wanted to assure you that Leonard is being well taken care of."

"I'm happy to hear that Beverly. He has been in quite a state for the past few weeks and, to be honest, has been a bit off for a long while."

"I assume you've read my book about his early upbringing, _Needy Baby, Greedy Baby_. Leonard's problems have been evident since birth. I had thought that years of therapy would have tempered his overwhelming need for acceptance and odd need for a mythical "traditional" family structure but I can now see that he was only presenting a front. I hope that full-time treatment will help him adjust to a new, more realistic life."

"As do I. I am sorry that he could not handle the changes that have occurred out here but as time went on it became more and more evident that the construct he existed under could not stand any longer. He placed all responsibility for his future happiness and success on poor Penny's shoulders."

"I agree, Sheldon. And that poor girl has enough obstacles in her life. She doesn't also need to be responsible for Leonard's happiness."

"Especially at the expense of her own."

"Indeed. Sheldon, what are your own plans?"

"I am quite satisfied that things for me will settle into a new homeostasis. My sister Missy and her son are quite happy living here with me. I look forward to Penny returning to her apartment across the hall. We have good friends who are supportive of us. And I expect my academic work will flourish with the support of my co-workers."

"So you aren't assuming a life of solitary research and theorizing."

"Beverly, it took me a very long time and great personal pain to discover that I am not an island. Others enrich my life and influence my work. I am now open to collaboration in all areas of endeavor."

"I'm not sure that is the wisest of decisions. I have found that the only one that I can truly trust is myself."

"There was a time not so long ago that I would have completely agreed with you. However, I learned that the contentment I thought I experienced on my own could be magnified when shared with those closest to me. While I don't believe that will really affect my work it will certainly help me enjoy my work a great deal more."

"Then I wish you success. We'll speak again next week. Goodbye, Sheldon."

"Goodbye, Beverly."

_A couple of days later_

Penny knocked on the door to 4A.

"Hi, sweetie."

"Hi, Missy. Sorry to stop by without calling. Alex dropped me off."

"Penny, always welcome means just that. Always welcome."

"Thanks. My new bed is getting delivered first thing in the morning. Is it okay if I crash on your couch tonight?"

"Of course. Or we can share the bed like last time."

"Whatever. Sheldon putting the baby down?"

"You know the schedule. Did you eat? I'm ordering pizza."

"Well, it is Thursday after all. I could eat."

Sheldon came out of Missy's bedroom and washed his hands in the kitchen sink.

"Hi Sheldon. My new bed…"

"I heard Penny. It will be very nice to have you back home."

"Yeah. Alex and Nora were great but I'm really looking forward to living by myself for a while. And getting a whole lot of Penny time when I'm not working."

"I assume you'll still be dropping by here at all hours of the day."

"Shelly…"

"Which you are of course welcome to do."

"Yeah, I figure I'll be hanging out here a bit. You know how much I like my time with the Coopers."

"As we Coopers love spending time with Queen Penelope."

"So I got a weird call from Bernadette today."

"I'm not certain what would constitute a weird call from Bernadette. Almost every phone call I've received from that woman has been odd. The last time she called she just yelled at me for forty minutes."

"Yeah. Anyway, she hadn't heard from Amy in a while so she went over to her mother's house to see how she was. The house has been sold and nobody knows where Amy and her mother went. They just disappeared."

"That is odd."

"And that's really soon after Leonard left for good. Isn't it a coincidence that both of the people you and I were with for so long are just gone now?"

"I guess that would qualify as a coincidence."

"Shelly!"

"Yes, Missy."

"You knew this was gonna come up sooner or later. You have to tell her."

"But Missy, things are just starting to calm down."

"Tell me what?"

"I suppose I should tell you."

"Tell me what?"

"Shelly, you probably want a little privacy for this. Why don't y'all go across the hall?"

"Really? My apartment is still a mess. I was hoping to start the cleanup after the bed got delivered."

"Actually, Penny, I took the liberty of straightening up a bit over the past couple of nights. I hope you don't mind."

"Oh, God no. I was dreading it, to be honest. Have you got a new chart for me?"

"I do. I posted it on your refrigerator. Let's go over. There are some things I should explain."

"Okay."

Penny and Sheldon went across to 4B.

Missy took a deep breath. "God I hope she takes this the right way."


	66. Chapter 66

**66**

_Apartment 4B_

Penny looked around her apartment. Everything was in its place and it was sparkling clean from top to bottom. She turned around and gave Sheldon a big hug.

"Thank you so much. I really appreciate this."

"Penny, please have a seat. There are a few things I need to tell you."

"Sheldon, you sound so serious. I'm getting a little worried."

"First, I need to ask you a question. How do you really feel about Leonard and Amy being gone?"

"Well, if you'd asked me that question a couple of weeks ago I'd have said that I was really sad and I missed them and hoped they wouldn't be gone long."

"And now?"

"I feel really bad for saying this but I think that right now the two of us are probably better off without them in our lives. They were kind of manipulating us both and, thinking about it now, neither of us was really very happy when we were with them. They were happy and they wanted us to be happy because of that."

"I would concur with your estimation of the situation, but I have felt that way considerably longer."

"How long?"

"Your relationship with Leonard, especially after you reconciled, I found deeply disturbing. Leonard seemed to have found a way to control you, to make you want to make him happy at the expense of your own happiness. He seemed to find a way to isolate you from others even while you were in the same room as them. I believe the two of you called that being in love. I don't believe that's what it was at all."

"I think you were probably right, Sheldon. I was convinced that being in love with Leonard was all I really needed, that he was the passion that was missing from my life."

"So you now feel that you are better off with him out of your life?"

"Considering how he started acting when I had other things in my life besides him, yeah. He figured he was enough and that he could fill my whole life with his image of happiness. He didn't really care about what I wanted at all."

"Yes, Amy Farrah Fowler was much the same way. She wanted Sheldon Cooper, potential Nobel Prize recipient. She had no desire for Sheldon Cooper, lover of comic books, science fiction, trains and schedules. She despised how I conducted my life. She was not terribly fond of my friends, save you, and I found her affection for you profoundly disturbing."

"Yeah, me too."

"In summation, I would say that we two are much better off and will have potentially much happier lives without Leonard and Amy in them."

"I'm a little to sorry to say this, because they were our friends for such a long time, but I agree with you Sheldon."

"Alright. Then I must admit to you that the events of the last several weeks were not entirely happenstance."

"Exactly what do you mean?"

"The FBI investigations that involved Leonard and Amy did not just happen. I played a part, albeit a small part, in getting them started. I did some things that you don't know about, that almost nobody knows about."

"What are you talking about, Sheldon?"

"While I was traveling over the summer I met someone who knew Joyce Kim and was aware that she had found her way out of North Korea."

"We all know she got out, Sheldon."

"Yes. But I began a correspondence with her, albeit anonymously, and encouraged her to come forward with details of what she had done while at CalTech."

"And expose Leonard's role in it."

"Yes."

"Why did you do that?"

"I felt that Leonard had never taken appropriate responsibility for his role in that matter and that it evidenced a pattern of behavior that led him to his actions in the Arctic, his shameful behavior with a number of women and his horrible treatment of you. I wished to give him an opportunity to finally take responsibility for some of his actions since his behavior over the years showed that he never believed anything he did should reflect badly on him."

"I guess you're right about the way he acted. But do you think you really had the right to wreck his career?"

"Penny, I don't believe I did that. Had Leonard merely admitted what he'd done and why he did it he probably could have gone forward with no more than a reprimand, a possibly diminished security clearance and a reputation as a horndog. But he denied anything had happened and ultimately sought to shift the blame to Howard, Raj and myself."

"Yeah, that sounds like Leonard, alright."

"Everything that happened to Leonard was a result of his own actions. I merely started the proverbial ball rolling."

"I think I understand what you're saying, Sheldon. I'm not sure that I agree that you are blameless but I'm willing to just let that lie for a bit. But what happened with Amy?"

"I have always believed that Amy Farrah Fowler's relationship with her Saudi benefactor and fiancé, Faisal, was a bit suspicious."

"Suspicious would be one word for it."

"When the FBI interviewed me regarding Leonard's role in the rocket fuel imbroglio I purposely let slip a nugget of information regarding Amy and Faisal. The FBI, as I suspected they would, followed up."

"What did they find out, Sheldon?"

"The FBI discovered that Faisal was deeply involved in financing terror activities around the world and in the United States. He employed Amy as an unwitting pawn to distribute funds."

"So he wasn't really supporting her research?"

"He was, but it was research that wasn't going to ever end, therefore providing an ongoing pipeline."

"I don't understand, Sheldon."

"Amy was addicting primates to substances already known to be addictive in order to study the effect of addiction on the brain. That is work that has been going on for many years. She was not interested in treating addiction, just studying its effects. It is not exactly groundbreaking work."

"Is that just you being snooty?"

"A bit."

"And you still haven't told me why Amy disappeared."

"When the FBI uncovered Faisal's network they shut down as much of it as they could and made a number of arrests. They also froze all of Faisal's U.S. bank accounts. Amy was suspended from her job at the lab and her supervisor was forced to resign for hiring her. It was very unlikely Amy would be returning to work there."

"Poor Amy."

"Additionally, some of Faisal's confederates who were not apprehended blamed Amy for their misfortune since she was their only link to Faisal."

"So Amy was in danger. Oh my God. How did she deal with that?"

"Amy dealt with it in the same manner she dealt with anything she didn't understand or appreciate. She was oblivious to it. She refused to believe she was in any danger. Much like Leonard refused to believe that you no longer loved him."

"I kind of see the similarity but Amy is in real danger."

"I agree. Ultimately the FBI asked me to assist them in convincing her to enter the Witness Protection Program, which I did. However, Amy attempted to use the situation as an opportunity to cement our relationship. She sought to convince me to enter the program with her."

"Guess she couldn't stop."

"No, she couldn't. I refuse to join her and ultimately I believe Amy's mother convinced her to go into the program and joined her. As far as I know they've been gone for over a week. We won't be hearing from Amy Farrah Fowler again."

"You know, despite Amy's problems, and she had a load of them, down deep she was kind of sweet. I'm sorry we couldn't at least have said goodbye."

"The FBI would never have permitted that. However, we can rest assured that she and her mother are safe."

"I guess."

"Penny?"

"Yes, Sheldon."

"You look a bit pensive."

"I guess I have some things to think about."

"I don't understand."

"Sheldon, I don't blame you for anything you did. I think that Amy and Leonard did some horrible things to you and it was entirely out of their own selfishness."

"You were a victim also, Penny."

"I guess. But the thing is, you let some pretty terrible things happen to people you once called your friends because they did some not very nice things to you."

"You're correct, Penny. I let things happen. I did not exactly make them happen. Conversely, both Leonard and Amy consciously took actions which ultimately came back and adversely affected them and they also consciously did things that harmed you and me."

"Okay. But I'd like to think that if I was going down the wrong road a friend, like you, would stop me."

"Penny?"

"Yes, Sheldon."

"Is that not exactly what I did?"

"I guess it is. I think I need to think about all of this a bit more."

"I understand. I just sincerely hope that it will not adversely affect our friendship."

"I hope so too. But I am going to need some time."


	67. Chapter 67

**67  
**

Sheldon returned to his apartment, leaving Penny in hers, thinking about what she'd just learned.

_Did Sheldon just finally have revenge on Leonard for the Arctic mishap?_

_Did Sheldon just tire of Amy's attentions and get rid of her?_

_Could she trust him? What if he was just biding his time, waiting to get back at her for some of the things she'd said about him and done to him?_

Penny didn't hear Missy come in and almost jumped across the room when she softly touched her shoulder.

"Deep in thought, huh?"

"Yeah. I guess. Sheldon gave me a bunch to think about. And some of it scares me a little. Well, maybe not just a little."

"I'm not surprised. Wanna talk about it?"

"Missy, how much do you know about what Sheldon did to Leonard and Amy?"

"All of it. We talked through it all before we came back."

"And you're okay with it?"

"Penny, do you remember what Sheldon was like before he left?"

"I know he was pretty confused. I know he was kinda lost."

"Sweetie, my brother is a handful. I know it. You know. He has strange habits and he's sure he's always right and he's got a superior attitude. He thinks he's smarter than everyone in the room."

"He usually is."

"Yeah. Well, when I found him on my doorstep he was none of those things. He was my little brother crying because he'd gotten beaten up by a couple of bullies. The problem was that those bullies were his best friend and his girlfriend and they were tryin' to take everything that made him him away so that they could rebuild him into something more acceptable to them. And, by the way, they were doin' the same thing to you."

"We've been through this before. You're right. What Amy and Leonard were doing to Sheldon was wrong. But that doesn't mean he gets to do something wrong to get back at them."

"Shelly and I talked about this a lot. He had a lot of much nastier ideas about what to do about Amy and Leonard. Much, much nastier. And I'll admit that some of the nastiest and meanest ideas were my suggestions and involved guns, knives, chains and a couple of pick-up trucks."

"Yeah, but we all imagine the ways we'd get back at people who wrong us. But we don't actually do it."

"Penny, we went round and round tryin' to figure out what to do, if anything. Remember, Shelly wasn't even sure he was comin' back. He mighta just walked away. What do you think things would be like for you if that happened?"

"That's a scary thought. I'd still be with Leonard. And I wouldn't have a job. And I'd probably be drinking more than ever."

"Not exactly a happy prospect."

"No."

"Once I convinced Shelly that he had to come back we started talkin' about whether he should really do somethin' about Amy and Leonard beyond just givin' 'em the cold shoulder."

"So you set out to destroy their careers?"

"No. Not at all. Penny, I know you ain't that religious, but are you familiar with the concept of original sin?"

"Basically."

"The way me and Shelly figured it, Leonard and Amy were good people who at some point went off the rails. We thought long and hard about when that happened for each of them. For Leonard we thought it was the Arctic thing for a long time. But that wasn't really it. It was the whole Joyce Kim situation. He stole rocket fuel to show someone who he later found out was a spy so he could get in her panties. And he pretty much got away with it. From that point on he just did whatever supported what he wanted, sabotaged the Arctic thing, cock blocked anyone who got near you, took relish in exposing any of Shelly's mistakes, lied to pretty much any girl he wanted and all the while he said he was a nice guy. What he was was amoral."

"Okay?"

"So, me and Shelly figured that we'd give Leonard a chance to clean up the first thing we knew he did wrong, that we thought sent him down the wrong path. We though that might get him thinkin' about everything he did after that. All we did was open the door. What happened after that was all Leonard."

"You could have stopped it when it went too far."

"You'll have to admit that Leonard went off the rails pretty darn quickly. Once his world was threatened he circled the crazy wagons."

"Yeah, he did do that. But what about Amy?"

"Sweetie, didn't you find it odd that she was engaged to a man that she was takin' tons of money from and dating my brother at the same time?"

"Well, yeah, but she said that things like that happen in funding all the time. Even Leonard had to fuck an old lady to get some big new doohickey for work."

"I think using Leonard as an example kind of makes my case."

"Basically what Amy was doin' was saying the ends justify the means. She also probably never made any effort to find out what else this Faisal guy was doin' besides giving her money."

"She can be pretty focused."

"Not exactly the word I'd use. Anyway, Shelly and I did a bunch of Googlin'. This Faisal guy does not exactly try to hide what he's doin' and who he's doin' it with. His family has a ton of money an' he pretty much does whatever he wants. And that includes killin' people. But I'm pretty sure that Amy didn't know anythin' about that because it had nothin' to do with her."

"Yeah. That sounds about right."

"Shelly and I didn't really know what to do about her. She was involved with really dangerous people. The only thing we did know was that we didn't want her anywhere near the baby."

"Okay. I get that. But why didn't Sheldon just tell Amy what he'd found out."

"You know Amy pretty well. How does she react when she hears something she doesn't like?"

"She pretends she didn't hear it."

"So Shelly figured it was better to get the FBI to tell her what was going on. She still didn't want to hear it. She had a chance to tell them everything that she knew about a guy they could prove to her was killing people but all she would do was swear up and down how wonderful he was for supporting her research and how important she and her work were."

"And now they're both gone."

"It didn't have to go that way, Penny. Leonard and Amy made it go that way."

"But they aren't the only ones who hurt Sheldon. Howard and Raj were in the Arctic. And I did some stuff and said some stuff and helped Amy and Leonard do things that Sheldon wouldn't like."

"When push came to shove Howard and Raj did the right thing, copped to what they'd done and risked everything to do what was right. That's even more than Sheldon expected from them. And so did you. You have tried to be there for Shelly for almost as long as you've known him. Penny, you know that Sheldon has always given you a wide berth. According to the Roommate Agreement Leonard was supposed to be Sheldon's best friend. When Sheldon wrote that he didn't really know what it meant. Over time he realized that Leonard not only wasn't he best friend, but he wasn't really a friend at all. Shelly figured out that another person was his best friend. You."

Penny started to tear up.

"I wasn't exactly much of a friend at all."

"We blame a lot of that on Leonard. Y'see, we think that Leonard could see how close you and Shelly were getting, that you two just gravitate towards each other. And we figure he was jealous and decided to do something about it. Part of it involved encouragin' you to drink more and more, knowing that Shelly has problems with that 'cause of our dad. And he kept getting' you to do things that would piss Shelly off, like the thing with the dining room table."

"We also think that Amy was helping Leonard keep you away from Sheldon by making sure you were hardly ever alone with him. We think she was a little jealous too. We just weren't sure exactly how her head worked 'cause it seemed like she wanted Shelly and she wanted you."

"And Amy and Bernie did always make sure I had plenty of wine and kept pushing me and Leonard together. But things would keep happening and Sheldon and me would keep finding ourselves together."

"Penny, I know you're worried that you mighta done somethin' or might do somethin' to piss Shelly off and he's just biding his time until he does something that hurts you. I promise you that Shelly could never, ever do anything to hurt you on purpose. He only wants good things for you. He wants you to be happy. He probably wants that even more than his darn Nobel Prize. But he'll probably never admit it. You're gonna have to trust me on this, sweetie."

"Okay."

"Now there's probably some pizza across the hall by now. How about we have some dinner and watch us a little TV and then go to bed and have a good cuddle? I know I could use one."

"Yeah. Me too."


	68. Chapter 68

_A/N: Once again, my apologies. I fell out of my storytelling groove and it's been difficult getting it back. Honestly, life got a little chaotic and it still is but I'm committed to finishing this story well. I know where I want this to end up and I think I finally figured out how to get there in not too many steps. So bear with me. And thanks for sticking around._

**68**

Penny had an appointment with her therapist Melanie the next day.

"Penny, how have you been?"

"I'm not even sure where to start."

"Well, how about we pick things up where we left off. You were going to tell Leonard that you thought that you shouldn't be living together, that you two needed time to figure out whether you wanted the same things."

"Yeah, that didn't go so well."

"What happened?"

"Leonard quit his job at the university that afternoon and decided we were both going to move to New Jersey. He was going to temporarily be a high school science teacher and I was going to go back to waiting tables at a local Cheesecake Factory and also keep house for his mother."

"And how did you feel about that?"

"I broke our engagement. Does that sum things up?"

"Actually, that's what you did. How did you feel?"

"I felt like Leonard was making decisions about my life without asking me. I really resented it. I thought he was being really disrespectful of my feelings and my desires."

"And how did Leonard react to that?"

"Not well. Not well at all. I think he couldn't accept that I was making a decision about my life that didn't place him front and center. Me and my friends have spent the last week dealing with him acting out about it."

"How so?"

"He tried to force me out of my apartment so I'd have no choice but to go with him. He implied that I was cheating on him with Nora. He tried to physically force me to go. He had my friend Missy, Sheldon's sister, arrested after she stopped him. He said he wasn't going to give up until I went with him."

"How did that make you feel?"

"Scared. Nervous. Afraid for my friends."

"Penny, you do understand that you don't have to wait for our appointments to speak to me if you're having problems, don't you? I'm available to you if any time you feel you need to speak to me."

"I get that. Thank you. I probably should have called. It's just things moved kind of quickly and between Leonard and work with Sheldon and getting set up at my other job and not really living anywhere…"

"It was a little crazy. I understand. You lost your center. I hope that in the future you remember that I can be helpful with that kind of thing. When stuff like that is going on…that's when you really need to speak to someone, to me."

"I guess I'm kind of lucky then because my closest friends rallied around and supported me. Sheldon and Missy were great. Alex and Nora gave me a place to stay with no conditions."

"What ended up happening?"

"We all got together with a few others and moved Leonard out of my apartment and ultimately out of Pasadena. He's in Jersey now with his mother who has him getting full-time psychiatric treatment. He really has lost it."

"How does that make you feel?"

"Well, we figured out that Leonard was making me responsible for his happiness and that wasn't right."

"Penny, please try to move away from describing the events and conversations. You are really the only one who knows how you feel about what Leonard was doing."

"I guess I feel like I was in a relationship where I didn't really have a say."

"And why was that?"

"I wanted Leonard to be happy and I figured that would make me happy."

"Did it?"

"Did it what?"

"Did Leonard being happy make you happy?"

"Not really. And his happiness was a moving target."

"Tell me about that."

"First he was happy to spend time with me. Then he was happy to have sex with me. He once told me that after we broke up the first time that he would say or do anything to have sex with me. Even after we started going out again he would trick me into having sex with him."

"How did you feel about that?"

"I didn't feel much of anything. To be honest, even though he did lots of research the sex was hit or miss, mostly miss."

"But he was happy."

"He said he was. He kept saying he loved me."

"But how did you feel?"

"I started to think that maybe there was more to a relationship than good sex and that eventually I'd figure out what that felt like if I stuck with Leonard."

"Okay, well there is definitely more to a relationship than good sex. But Penny, physical companionship is important too. You are a physical person. You shouldn't deny that part of your satisfaction."

"But that isn't all there is, is it?"

"Of course not. A good relationship has intellectual, emotional and physical elements that all contribute. It sounds to me like you weren't getting any of those things from Leonard and he was only looking for one of those things from you."

"But I figured that over time the other stuff would happen."

"How long were you with Leonard?"

"On and off around four years plus a couple of years as friends in there."

"And it was still mostly unsatisfying sex along with emotional neediness and a helping of emotional manipulation."

"Yeah."

"Penny, now that the relationship is over, how do you feel about it."

"I feel kinda stupid."

"You aren't stupid. We've only spoken a few times but one thing I would never call you is stupid. Maybe a little naïve."

"I don't understand."

"You thought that because you found someone who said he was head over heels in love with you, who was different from every guy you'd ever gone out with, who met with the approval of your family and your peer group, that you needed to commit to him. You thought that eventually it would feel right and that you'd be satisfied."

"Sounds right."

"You deserved better and you couldn't see a way of getting there so you settled. You're not the first woman to do that. You won't be the last."

"So what now?"

"This is a process, Penny. Hopefully I can help you figure out what you need and what you want and you'll be able to take it from there."

"Sheldon and I kind of figured out the same thing."

"We haven't really talked much about Sheldon."

"I know. It's a little weird. I really care for him and I know it's mutual. He's probably my closest friend in the world. But he's been through some changes too. He was also involved with someone who was pushing him somewhere he wasn't sure he wanted to go. He's still kind of recovering from that. And he just told me some stuff that I'm a little bothered by."

"I'm not a mind reader, Penny."

"Sheldon had a little to do with Leonard's problems at work and Amy's too."

"Did he create those problems?"

"No. No he didn't. But he kind of exposed them."

"Did he do anything that made them worse?"

"No. Leonard and Amy did that themselves."

"Did Sheldon believe he had a good reason to expose those things?"

"Sheldon thought he was giving Leonard and Amy a chance to address some things they'd done in the past which weren't so good."

"I know you're probably getting tired of me asking…"

"How do I feel about that? To be honest, I'm not sure. Leonard did something hat he never took responsibility for and Sheldon gave him the chance to do that. He didn't. He actually tried to shift the blame to Sheldon and a couple of other friends. Amy was involved with a really bad person."

"What do you mean by involved?"

"He was funding her research and she was technically engaged to him."

"I'm not sure what 'technically engaged' means."

"Yeah, me neither. But she referred to him as her fiancé."

"Then she was engaged to him."

"I guess. But when the FBI, who Sheldon told about them, told Amy what kind of bad things this guy did she refused to hear it."

"Okay. I can see how you might be concerned about what Sheldon did. He played around with these people's lives. And that's a bit morally murky. But I think he was hoping something good would come out of it."

"But it didn't."

"Is that really Sheldon's fault?"

"No."

"I sense that you might want more from Sheldon. You should be very careful. You are both very vulnerable right now. You shouldn't mistake mutual need for something else."

"We kinda talked about that. We both think that we're not ready for another relationship right now. We need time."

"That was a good decision to make. I'm proud of you."

"I'm a little worried though."

"Why?"

"Well, to be honest, I like sex. I'm used to being sexually active. And, well, even if we decided to start seeing each other it would probably be a long time until we were physically intimate. He has some issues. I think he'd get there but…"

"You don't know if you can wait."

"I can wait for the relationship. I think it'll be worth it. I'm just not sure I can wait for the sex. And I work for him and live across the hall and I don't know how he'll react, how he'll feel if I just take care of my needs. Nothing more than that."

"Are you sure he'll find out?"

"He'll know. It's not like he's stalking me it's just that he's really aware of me and what I do. Partly because of proximity. Partly because he cares. I don't want to hurt him."

"Maybe you and Sheldon need to have a talk."

"I guess we do"

_A/N 2: I'm sorry that I haven't been very good about responding to your comments and reviews lately. My very dicey Internet connection makes it very difficult. Please know that I appreciate your reviews, favorites and follows very much._


	69. Chapter 69

_A/N: I was a bit uncomfortable with where I left the last chapter. Here's a little coda._

**69**

_Penny is still with her therapist_

"Penny, I'd like you to think about something."

"Okay."

"You've told me you think that there's a possibility for something real and lasting with Sheldon, a kind of relationship you've never experienced before."

"Yeah, I thought that was what I had with Kurt and it blew up in my face and then with Leonard and we know how that worked out."

"And you've told me that sex was a big part of the foundation of both of those relationships."

"Yeah."

"Maybe it might be better to try to stay away from that for a while. Maybe concentrate on building your friendship with Sheldon to give your potential relationship a better foundation."

"I guess that makes sense. But I know me. Sooner or later…"

"Actually, Penny, I don't think you know yourself at all right now. For the first time in your life things are actually looking better. You're supporting yourself doing something you enjoy. You have a better sense of self-worth. You have some wonderful opportunities coming."

"Okay."

"I get that you enjoy sex but up till now it was possibly the most enjoyable part of your life, the only thing you knew you were really good at. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"I think so. That maybe I shouldn't let old Penny literally screw things up for new Penny."

"I'm not sure I would have put it that way but yes. Old Penny was insecure except in the one place she knew she did well and received validation. Now that you receive validation in other parts of your life perhaps you could consider…"

"Holding off. Waiting until I know for sure whether Sheldon is the one."

"Actually, it's more about you. I'd like you to give new Penny a chance to figure out who she is and what she wants before you let old Penny's needs become so important they start affecting your actions."

"I guess that makes sense. It's not like there are guys beating down my door."

"There will be. But I'd like you to seriously consider what you do. I also have another question."

"Okay?"

"How much did alcohol have to do with your sex life?"

"Um, a lot. When I was dating around it involved going to bars and bringing guys home, most of whom I never saw again."

"And you still aren't drinking, right?"

"I'm not and I guess I'm okay with that. I wasn't very happy with my life before and it helped me cope. Now, except for the craziness with Leonard, things are pretty good. My new friends don't drink as much or at all. And I guess I don't miss it."

"So that's another thing to think about."

"Okay."

"What I'm asking you to do is try to accept the changes in your life and see where they take you. I'm here to help and from what you've told me I can see there are others who also want to help you. Try to get centered. You're barely back in your own apartment, which you can now afford. Your job is still pretty new and your other job hasn't started yet but will soon. Your circle of friends has changed somewhat and that's still settling. Leonard and Amy are now out of your life, at least for the immediate future. Breathe. Accept. Don't try to do more than you can. Try to figure out who Penny is now and who she wants to be. And please don't feel you need to be defined by another person. That's something only you can do."

"That's a lot."

"It is, but I think you are absolutely capable of it. Though you've been through a bunch of jarring changes to your life it seems to me that you have adjusted and will continue to adjust. Please don't rush things."

"Okay. I think I get what you're saying. Thanks. See you next week."

"And if you run into anything where you need to speak to someone, please call."

"I will."


End file.
